By dead - 09/03/2010 00:49 - Canada
The Top
By stupidbullcrêpe - 20/08/2012 22:06 - Brazil - Santos
By memphis201 - 26/07/2012 17:20 - United States - Lexington
memphis201 tells us more.
By Anonymous - 07/03/2010 14:08 - United Kingdom
By Dontworryaboutit - 28/12/2009 10:16 - United States
By SecondBest,IGuess - 30/04/2013 17:35 - United States
Tall grass
By Anonymous - 16/06/2011 14:43 - United States
By junkie - 18/12/2012 18:28 - Belgium - Antwerp
Roid rage incoming
By screwed - 22/12/2010 17:56 - Canada
Good one, thanks
By RYZILLAHitZ - 30/06/2011 01:32 - United States
Asshat
By jayc80 - 20/05/2011 17:59 - Bermuda
By Seabiscuit - 06/07/2009 04:03 - United States
By Anonymous - 12/09/2012 21:06 - United States
DELETE! DELETE!
By Hunter101 - 12/05/2012 04:24 - United States - Humble
By fatman - 10/08/2010 02:29 - United States
By NoCnNoJustice - 17/04/2015 13:49 - Australia - Brisbane
NoCnNoJustice tells us more.
You'd be right! I'll try and condense the story for you. So basically, I was playing Counter-Strike: Global Offensive (the game mentioned in my post) and my team was messing about and killing each other. In my frustration, I called the one who was the most annoying on my team a baked potato. It seems that he too must have been frustrated, because the next thing I know, he's called a vote to kick me from my team. Since I'm at the top of the leaderboard and I'm carrying my team (despite losing by a huge margin), I think to myself "Well, it's not like they're going to vote 'Yes', they need me on this team if we're ever going to win!" But, to my surprise, they all accepted the vote and I was kicked, consequently resulting in a 7 day ban from Competitive Matchmaking. Well, that's it! I hope this backstory behind it was sufficient.
By bluerhhajfk - 19/08/2013 23:29 - United States - Providence
bluerhhajfk tells us more.
Apparently his friend gave him some to try. He's only 14 so I don't think he knew any better. He told me he was experimenting, and I think that's an okay thing to do so long as he learned his lesson. He is just a young stupid teenager. Moral of the story: Don't do drugs, kids. Or you'll burn your penises.
Absolute beginners
By dancerr2210 - 09/06/2010 04:01 - United States
Cravings
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Ireland
By StrandedWhale - 03/11/2013 07:21 - United Kingdom
By cumhole - 10/10/2012 02:32 - Canada - Toronto
By Anonymous - 11/11/2009 00:28 - United States
By KatzVKatz - 24/07/2015 21:51 - Slovenia - Novo Mesto
KatzVKatz tells us more.
Hey, I didn't think this would get published, but here it is! Now for some explanations: 1. I did watch Pokemon when I was younger and I liked it. When he dared me to name 10 first gen Pokemon I was sure I could do it ... Guess my memory is not that good, but I already know that :D 2. He did admit eventually that he was sorta kinda joking. I knew he couldn't be serious about dumping me, but he did take the joke a bit too far, like yelling at me and sulking for half an hour. 3. I do take interest in his interests, we talk a lot about the games he plays and the series he watches, and do a lot of stuff together. We do have a lot in common. It's just that where he likes Pokemon to the point of fangirling about it, I'm the same with Harry Potter and Dr. Who. 4. I asked him to name ten spells from Harry Potter and he couldn't do it, so I guess we're even! Ha! :D
Romantic move
By soomeone - 16/02/2010 19:28 - United States
By Lady_Luck - 25/03/2009 19:31 - United States
By Anonymous - 28/02/2010 11:16 - Canada
Kinda sweet
By cakegirl - 26/05/2009 01:15 - United States
By cero_kewl - 05/03/2012 05:12 - United States
By thankzbabe - 04/01/2012 12:32 - United States
By failure - 16/07/2009 16:25 - Canada
Keywords
Just for clarification, I always wash my hands before I use a tampon, but in this case it was an emergency, if you get what I mean by that. I also didn't have the kind that uses an applicator available so I had to actually put my hands up there for the tampon to function properly.