Cars

Am I being detained?

By Anonymous - 15/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 577

Panic mode activated

By Man in car - 11/10/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 287

Bad day, huh?

By Anonymous - 09/10/2024 12:00 - United States - Boulder

Today, I got a flat tire. While trying to change it, I dropped my phone down a storm drain. I had to hitchhike home, and the guy who picked me up told me he wasn't even sure I wasn't a serial killer. I told him I wasn't. He then said, "That's what a serial killer would say." FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 112

Cars these days…

By Kevin - 08/10/2024 12:00 - Canada - Ottawa–Gatineau

Today, my relatively new car locked down, with my keys inside of it, while it was still running. In a panic because it was getting dark and I was already low on fuel, I called a locksmith. He showed up and told me he needed to see some ID before unlocking the car. My ID was in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 103

Axe to grind

By Hope his parents are proud. - 07/10/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, at my workplace, I caught a kid trying to break into my boss's car, as well as my own. After warning him that I'd call the police if I caught him again, he left. Then, after I got home, I heard weird noises right outside my door. It was him again, trying to break into my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 89

All cars look the same these days

By Anonymous - 07/10/2024 06:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, I hopped into what I thought was my friend’s car, sat down, and started chatting away about the trip to Vegas we were about to hit the road for. After a few moments of awkward silence, I looked up to see a terrified stranger staring at me. I was very close to getting maced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 494

You do you, boo

By Anonymous - 06/10/2024 12:00 - United States - Austin

Today, I had to sit in silence at a restaurant table as my friends ripped into the Tesla Cybertruck and laughed about how "shit and cringe" it is. I was silent because I couldn't bring myself to defend it, even though I think they're pretty cool, and I actually want one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 705

Hey good lookin'

By Creepster - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 640

You deserved it 51 495

Creepypasta time

By Saw - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking down the street, when a car started cruising alongside me. I looked over, annoyed, at which point the driver started screaming obscenities and telling me that I'm "gonna get it" for "betraying" him, before angrily speeding off. I'm too scared to even sleep now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 002

You deserved it 2 717

They all look the same to me

By Anonymous - 29/09/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I picked up my daughter from daycare. As we were getting into the car, I strapped her into the car seat, but something felt off. I looked back and realized I had picked up the wrong kid. In my defense, she was wearing the same jacket as my daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 562

Make it stop, please

By Anonymous - 27/09/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I had to listen to my mom give a detailed description of her date last night to her friends via speakerphone... while I was trapped in the car with her. When I pointed out that I was still in the back seat, she scoffed and told me, "I have a sex life, deal with it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 123

Amazing timing

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Antelope

Today, I was walking home, when a car heading the other way hit a traffic cone. I must have been an asshole in a previous life, because the universe decided to make sure the cone flew into the side of my head. The bystanders were shocked for all of two seconds before laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 120

You deserved it 4 410

Wandering eye

By Anonymous - 24/09/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband managed to crash the car because he was too busy looking at an attractive girl with her leggings wedged up her ass crack, and I know he only crashed because he was looking at her, because I was in the car with him when it happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 102

Emotional journey

By sad and embarrassed guy - 21/09/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, my love life is so godawful that I started ugly-crying when the song "Love Hurts" began playing on the radio while I was driving. I had to pull over. Several people passing by stopped to see if I needed help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 318

You deserved it 172

Bystander

By Chops - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking from my office to the place I had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner, I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. When I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100 312

You deserved it 4 522

Thank you for your service

By Paulalala - 11/09/2024 20:00 - United States - Helena

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The cop asked if I had a reason for going so fast. I panicked and said, “I have to poop.” He followed me home with lights on, just to make sure I made it. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 449

Unwelcome home

By Bee Quarantine - 10/09/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, there is a wasp nest right next to my front door. To exit the house safely, I have to use the back door and carefully sneak over to the car. Alternatively, I can just walk everywhere. Or I can become a shut-in, but I don't think I'd last long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 302

You deserved it 164

Vent away

By GregIsGreg - 10/09/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I was getting into a Uber after a long day at work. I opened the door, sat down, and started venting to the driver about my horrible day. Five minutes in, I realized I had climbed into a random stranger’s car. He didn’t even tell me; he just let me complain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 178

You deserved it 459

What we do in the shadows

By suspiciouspeople - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I discovered that sitting in the back of your car from 8 to 9 p.m. talking with a friend in a park area is suspicious enough behavior to have cops called on you, then for backup to arrive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 948

You deserved it 5 355

Don't know, don't care

By Anonymous - 02/09/2024 13:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I was in a car accident. When I came home, I told my mom. She just got angry with me, blamed me for it, and didn't even ask if I was OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 90

Negative aura

By Anonymous - 31/08/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend's dad by showing off my "impressive" knowledge of cars. When he mentioned she had a problem with her engine, I jokingly told him it was probably the “flux capacitor” that needed adjusting. He stared at me blankly and said, “You know that’s from Back to the Future, right?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 542

All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff

Today, I waited in the pouring rain for my wife to come pick me up from work. It was only after I was thoroughly drenched that I remembered it was my wife's day off, and that I drove myself to work earlier in her car, which was parked fifty feet from where I was waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 678

You deserved it 45 403

Wakey wakey

By Anonymous - 28/08/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I took a quick nap in my car during my lunch break. I'd set an alarm but forgot to turn my car off, having switched the AC on due to the blistering heat. The cool air lulled me to sleep. When I woke up, my boss was knocking on my window. Apparently, I'd knocked the car into neutral and it had rolled into his parking spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 143

You deserved it 530

Emotional rollercoaster

By ehcanadianeh - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found $20 under my car seat, so I put it in the cup holder, only for it to fly out of the window while going down the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 998

You deserved it 12 357

Kevin REALIZES he's LITERALLY not going home [GRAPHIC]

By Anonymous - 25/08/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I carpooled with my boss for the first time. To avoid any small talk, which makes me really anxious, I turned on my Spotify. Unfortunately, I forgot I'd been listening to a true crime podcast the night before. We spent the next 15 minutes listening to a gruesome murder description before I realized it. My boss looked horrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 487

Groundhog Day

By Steve - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I had a car accident. In the same place, at the same time, and with the same friend in the passenger seat as last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 759

You deserved it 11 918

And you may ask yourself, "Where is that large automobile?"

By gus98 - 17/08/2024 07:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went outside and walked to my car, only to see someone had hit and run my car while it was parked. My insurance company deemed my car a total loss. The person who did this never got caught. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 92

Brain fog

By Anonymous - 16/08/2024 06:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I walked out of the grocery store, loaded my bags into my car, then sat in the driver’s seat. I tried to start the engine, but the key wouldn’t turn. That’s when I noticed the child’s seat in the back, which I don’t have. I was in the wrong car, and the owner was standing outside, laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 189

Haste

By JulieFromMars - 15/08/2024 09:00 - Ireland - Galway

Today, I was running late for work and I was carrying my stuff to my car, handbag over my shoulder, laptop in one hand, and my coffee in the other. As I tried to unlock my car, I spilt the coffee all over myself, the car, and my laptop. Now, I’m sticky, wet, and my laptop won't turn on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 318

You deserved it 250

It's a deal

By Anonymous - 08/08/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my husband bought his fifth car in two years. He doesn't wreck them, but he keeps buying old junk cars "for a bargain" that are one bad day away from being scrapped. The last one lasted two months before the frame broke in half from rust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 75

Keywords

Love Nice Guys Dating Transportation Awkward Cute Coworkers Embarrassing Work Miscellaneous Shopping Parents Money Cheating Health Autism Mental health Stressed out Confused Relatable Relationship advice Gross Family Weddings AITA Am I overreacting? Spiders DIY Kids Fire

The Top

Today, while in a pharmacy, I walked over to the shaving cream aisle. I picked up a can to smell it and unknowingly pushed the button, spraying an old guy in front of me. He freaked out and started telling everyone that the ceiling above him was leaking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 524

You deserved it 17 431

Here's the latest video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com, enjoy! Kay Akana, co-founder of 10secondtraumas.com, is also a stand-up comedian in LA. Do go and check out her performances, she did manage to make us lot laugh! ...

I agree, your life sucks 2

You deserved it 29

The Top

Today, after working at the same place for 3 years, I found out that they are not only cutting my hours but now I have to take orders from some girl I trained because she was promoted over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 507

You deserved it 2 688

Today, I found that my coworker left an "upper decker" in the toilet as a prank. I didn't realize this until I flushed. The poop clogged the top part of the toilet, which would not stop filling. I had to reach into the poopy water to unplug it. All I went in there to do was pee, and I had the CFO of our company waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 73

Today, I told a friend I had become more religious lately. He immediately started mocking me for being a 'stupid creationist bigot'. When I told him how offensive that was, he acted bewildered and started condescendingly lecturing me about how 'science has proven God does not exist'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 815

Today, I read a message from someone on Instagram asking if I wanted to "hook up with a nice guy sometime." It was my uncle – he doesn't recognize his own family before messaging them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 65

Today, I slept through my alarm and decided to call in sick. After falling back asleep, I woke up to my younger brother robbing my kitchen. It seems he's been doing this for weeks, every time I leave for work. He won't even give it all back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 197

You deserved it 2 506

Today, a tornado watch has been instituted in my town. At this moment, I have violent diarrhea, and my toilet sits right in front of a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 275

You deserved it 4 250