By - 18/2/2020 18:00 Who is that? Today, while me and my husband had sex, I called my husband "Gabe". That's nowhere near his name and I don't even know a Gabe. He then asked what that means "Gabe darling". FML I agree, your life sucks 225 You deserved it 89 1 2 3 14 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Beth is shamed - 14/2/2020 12:00 Sensual surprise Today, I wanted to surprise my husband because of valentine's day by being naked with a towel. I waited behind a door for him to enter. When he arrived, I dropped my towel to not only flash him? but to show him also that I am clean. FML I agree, your life sucks 745 You deserved it 788 172 9 10 35 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 13/2/2020 19:00 I don't care Today, my girlfriend sends me a revenge video of her having sex with another guy, because I was cheating on her. I got angry with her but later used the video to masturbate. FML I agree, your life sucks 447 You deserved it 3362 36 8 22 278 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 12/2/2020 18:00 Right in the millet Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and our grandma walked in the room. FML I agree, your life sucks 755 You deserved it 1953 62 16 189 99 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By enchilada_ice_cream - 11/2/2020 18:00 Crazy and Spicy Today, my wife and I tried to spice up our sex by blindfolding her. She started saying it felt good inside her, but I hadn’t gone in yet. I look down and our hamster escaped from its cage and was crawling inside her. FML I agree, your life sucks 1614 You deserved it 475 60 7 325 88 31 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 8/2/2020 18:00 Crazy party Today, I heard that there's a rumour going around that I was caught masturbating while crying at a party after the girl I liked got with someone else. FML I agree, your life sucks 1848 You deserved it 228 21 6 34 134 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 5/2/2020 20:00 Big surprise Today, I went to write "Happy birthday, I Love You" on my girlfriend's car windows to surprise her when she woke up. I was the one who got the surprise when I saw her, in her backseat, having sex. FML I agree, your life sucks 2992 You deserved it 195 77 12 241 88 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 3/2/2020 20:00 I did it Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML I agree, your life sucks 2650 You deserved it 438 15 6 271 123 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 1/2/2020 18:00 Young kids Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML I agree, your life sucks 2255 You deserved it 1105 49 11 294 97 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 30/1/2020 20:00 Someone else Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML I agree, your life sucks 2489 You deserved it 204 81 10 179 53 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 26/1/2020 20:00 Early show Today, I was at work, working on a new play. In the final dress rehearsal, I heard some of the crew laughing so I looked down at the very revealing costume to see that my left testicle was hanging out. FML I agree, your life sucks 1969 You deserved it 404 8 6 37 237 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/1/2020 18:00 Please do it Today, it was my last day with my boyfriend before he went to college. At the store, he got a huge box of condoms. When I asked why he was getting so many, he said they were for the girls he meets at college. He then asked me to steal them for him. FML I agree, your life sucks 2502 You deserved it 264 182 6 113 46 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 23/1/2020 18:00 Just love! Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved his flaming red hair. He told me that he loved the fuzz on my butt. FML I agree, your life sucks 1670 You deserved it 405 9 15 10 270 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 21/1/2020 18:00 Take a walk Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse. When I bent down to pick it up, some guy came up behind me, humped my ass, then ran away laughing. FML I agree, your life sucks 2756 You deserved it 278 103 12 218 139 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 19/1/2020 18:00 Romantic gesture Today, I learned that a spontaneous romantic gesture of arriving home early with flowers and wine is not welcome when your wife is busy having sex with your brother. FML I agree, your life sucks 4489 You deserved it 176 123 12 442 33 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 18/1/2020 18:00 Strange flight Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML I agree, your life sucks 2376 You deserved it 180 27 2 72 160 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 16/1/2020 18:00 I am clumsy! Today my girlfriend was on top during sex. I went to slap her butt, missed and nailed myself in the balls. We had to stop. She wouldn't stop laughing. FML I agree, your life sucks 1718 You deserved it 2054 7 11 13 524 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Oof - 15/1/2020 18:00 Keep calm please! Today, while things were getting hot and heavy with my boyfriend, we were making out and our nose rings got stuck together... it took us 20 minutes to get them unhooked. I was the calm one in the situation while my boyfriend nearly cried like a baby. I agree, your life sucks 1805 You deserved it 1184 14 9 7 294 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 14/1/2020 20:00 - Madagascar Delicious coffee Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML I agree, your life sucks 2821 You deserved it 362 38 16 74 348 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 13/1/2020 18:00 Science teacher Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML I agree, your life sucks 2212 You deserved it 183 24 4 36 309 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By "g_i_raffe" - 11/1/2020 18:00 The end Today, my boyfriend and I had to go downstairs during sex as it was too hot to function upstairs. I threw the bottle of lube downstairs to him, it hit him in the dick. We couldn't continue. FML I agree, your life sucks 1806 You deserved it 991 27 6 12 320 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 10/1/2020 18:00 Volcanic eruption Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML I agree, your life sucks 2382 You deserved it 663 21 12 29 412 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 7/1/2020 18:00 Negative response Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by creating an account on Runescape; his favorite game. After finding him in-game, I started talking to him, not revealing who I was. After a while, I asked him if he had a girlfriend. He promptly said no and asked me for nude pics. FML I agree, your life sucks 3499 You deserved it 1430 210 19 98 158 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 4/1/2020 18:00 The best method! Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML I agree, your life sucks 2284 You deserved it 671 45 29 37 406 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 2/1/2020 18:00 Hard to believe Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML I agree, your life sucks 3263 You deserved it 402 223 9 43 93 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 29/12/2020 18:00 Parents love Today, I walked in on my dad masturbating to a nude photo of my mum on the computer. She passed away four years ago. FML I agree, your life sucks 2169 You deserved it 910 747 21 76 30 24 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 27/12/2019 20:00 Our anniversary Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blowjob from me. FML I agree, your life sucks 2090 You deserved it 398 48 13 22 303 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 26/12/2019 20:00 Christmas shopping Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML I agree, your life sucks 1918 You deserved it 169 18 8 51 223 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/12/2019 18:00 What does it mean? Today, I bought a used car from a friend of mine. After getting the car home and further inspecting it, I found one of my wife's earrings in the backseat. FML I agree, your life sucks 2640 You deserved it 181 40 8 261 41 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/12/2019 18:00 Just a formality Today, my boyfriend of 4 years proposed to me. I said yes and he gave me an engagement ring. He immediately went to call his mom to tell her the happy news. After the phone call, he asked if he could return the ring because his mom needed money. FML I agree, your life sucks 3105 You deserved it 199 104 6 238 39 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, I realised I had 4 (justifiable) FML posts in 48 hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 You deserved it 2 0 Comments