By Anonymous - 29/5/2020 20:00 Addicted to love Today, I was half paying attention to a text message conversation with someone about how addicted we both were to social media. It's wasn't until deep into the conversation that I realized we were actually talking about porn. FML I agree, your life sucks 428 You deserved it 325 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 29/5/2020 08:00 Overdoing it Today, my boyfriend convinced me to "dirty talk" with him. I'd never done it before, so I figured I would give it a go. I ended up getting so excited that I had an anxiety attack. FML I agree, your life sucks 783 You deserved it 143 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 28/5/2020 05:00 Alexa, play "Living Doll" by Cliff Richard Today, my boyfriend dumped me out of nowhere, supposedly because I act like he's nothing but a sex doll. We've been dating 6 weeks and have had sex twice. FML I agree, your life sucks 1131 You deserved it 120 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 27/5/2020 23:00 British Broadcasting Corporation Today, working from home due to the quarantine, things were going slow so I typed "Lola Fox BBC DP porn" into my team chat, thinking I was typing it into my browser. My supervisor took it down as soon as it happened, but people definitely saw. FML I agree, your life sucks 325 You deserved it 1894 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By my eyes!! - 27/5/2020 08:00 Knock next time Today, I walked in on my husband's elderly parents getting it on. It’s beautiful they still love each other, I just wish they hadn’t decided to express that love on our living room sofa. FML I agree, your life sucks 1331 You deserved it 114 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 26/5/2020 23:00 Incognito browsing Today, my dad is super overprotective and can view my search history through his phone. I'd downloaded the Google app to be able search for things he wouldn't approve of. I just realized I've been making all these searches on my school account. I go to a private school and they can view my search history. FML I agree, your life sucks 633 You deserved it 1500 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By KTBeck - 26/5/2020 14:00 Three is the magic number Today, my husband returned from a hiking trip. We had "I missed you" sex and after we were done, he told me about all the ticks he had while on the trail. He then went to shower and while washing, he found a tick latched to his penis. I technically had a three way. FML I agree, your life sucks 1522 You deserved it 210 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By thanks a lot - 26/5/2020 08:00 Stay alert! Today, my state began relaxing the quarantine order. We decided to take the kids for a nice picnic in the park to get them outside. First park we went to, we saw a homeless man openly pissing in the parking lot. Second park, we saw two teens fucking on the table. Day was officially ruined. FML I agree, your life sucks 1372 You deserved it 258 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 24/5/2020 17:00 Let it all out Today, I had too much to eat at dinner. I had to cut sexy time with my husband short because I couldn't do it. I feel bad because it's his birthday today but we stopped. I then proceeded to throw up everything I ate today. FML I agree, your life sucks 1142 You deserved it 481 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 24/5/2020 05:00 Get out Today, while I was working in a department store, two 15-year-old kids started having sex in a changing room. When I found them, the boy pulled out and said, "You want in, bitch?" I then had to prevent his jealous, half-naked girlfriend from murdering me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1729 You deserved it 123 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 23/5/2020 20:00 Feelin' sexy Today, my wife, who NEVER wants to have sex, decided that now is the time. I, of course, had to take antibiotics that make me so bloated I can’t move without extreme pain. FML I agree, your life sucks 1255 You deserved it 101 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pey - 21/5/2020 14:00 Revelations Today, my boss told me I had to fire my co-worker. I didn't want to do it, but I didn't want to lose my job. I told my co-worker that the boss said we had to let him go. He told me that he had sex with my wife. My wife didn't deny it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1993 You deserved it 114 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By whyyyyy - 17/5/2020 23:00 Subjective Today, after months of dating, I finally saw my boyfriend naked. Turns out he has a micropenis. I assured him that I like him for who he was and that we could explore other things. He said no, because oral and sex toys are "immoral." FML I agree, your life sucks 2448 You deserved it 222 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SkipBeatOtaku - 16/5/2020 20:00 A load of hot air Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML I agree, your life sucks 1357 You deserved it 550 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 15/5/2020 23:00 The geyser Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML I agree, your life sucks 3451 You deserved it 241 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 13/5/2020 08:00 Frustrated Today, after 10-plus years of marriage, my husband still gets off after 5 minutes. I find myself just wanting to just go down on him, instead of being unsatisfied right when I start to get into it myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 1584 You deserved it 263 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By that'sokay - 12/5/2020 23:00 Deception Today, I found out the guy I have been sleeping with didn't actually break up with his girlfriend. She just moved for a few weeks during quarantine. They are now living with each other, and I'm alone and confused. FML I agree, your life sucks 1498 You deserved it 350 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/5/2020 08:00 Frustration Today, my wife is still refusing all forms of sex, because she thinks if she gets pregnant during lockdown, she’ll be the butt of all her friends' jokes about what people get up to to relieve the lockdown boredom. I know what I’d like to be getting up to right now to relieve my boredom. FML I agree, your life sucks 1685 You deserved it 290 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By naas1201 - 10/5/2020 23:00 It's not working Today, and since the beginning of our couples therapy, my wife and I don't do it anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 1307 You deserved it 218 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 8 Legs plus 1 - 8/5/2020 14:00 - United Kingdom Spider-Maaaaaaan Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She went to the bathroom momentarily, only to be greeted by a 'huge' spider, which disappeared under a cabinet. Due to her chronic arachnophobia, this instantly turned her off and caused her paranoia all night. I essentially got cock-blocked by a spider. FML I agree, your life sucks 1592 You deserved it 210 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By shay786 - 5/5/2020 17:00 My eyes! Today, I heard grunting and then realized it was my tenant with his boyfriend. When I went down to do my laundry, I caught them in the act. FML I agree, your life sucks 1457 You deserved it 254 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 3/5/2020 17:00 Indifference Today, my boyfriend walked in on me having phone sex with another guy. He either didn't notice or didn't care. FML I agree, your life sucks 427 You deserved it 4179 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lynn_27 - 2/5/2020 08:00 Hammertime Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to tell me he couldn't take it anymore because my legs were too hairy. I shaved yesterday. FML I agree, your life sucks 1733 You deserved it 241 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By easyontheeyes1 - 1/5/2020 02:00 Romantic afterglow Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Immediately after we'd finished, he said, "Get off, you're making it hard to breathe on top of me." FML I agree, your life sucks 1487 You deserved it 367 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 30/4/2020 17:00 The View Today, my boyfriend refuses to do doggy style anymore because I, and I quote, "have a weird looking butthole, it’s not dirty or anything, it’s just the strangest butthole I’ve ever seen, it’s really distracting." So now, I’m not only self conscious about my small boobs, but my ugly asshole too. FML I agree, your life sucks 2032 You deserved it 188 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 29/4/2020 23:00 Go back to bed, Brad Today, I noticed that when my boyfriend is sick, his sex drive goes through the roof. Too bad his stamina plummets. FML I agree, your life sucks 1428 You deserved it 156 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sarahir - 29/4/2020 05:00 Classic Dave Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML I agree, your life sucks 1819 You deserved it 313 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By quarantine15 - 28/4/2020 14:00 Oh, so sexy Today, I tried to be sexy and asked my husband of 6 years if he wanted to "put a baby in me." He shook the recent belly fat I gained and asked, "Is there room for a baby in there?" FML I agree, your life sucks 1888 You deserved it 540 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 24/4/2020 20:00 And today on Maury… Today, I was driving my best friend home when he admitted to being gay. I was glad he could trust me with a secret like this. Until he admitted to having sex with my boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 2220 You deserved it 160 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 23/4/2020 20:00 Freudian slip Today, I accidentally sent a very sexually explicit message to my online class because I thought I was typing in a different window. You can't delete messages. FML I agree, your life sucks 775 You deserved it 2063 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, Pretty short and quick, tripped and went complete cannonball down the stairs crashing down on my knees breaking whats called the "ligament". So... I agree, your life sucks 22 You deserved it 5 0 Comments
Today, After years and years of fighting how I truly feel, I finally came to terms with my sexuality. But I can never come out to my family because they... I agree, your life sucks 98 You deserved it 11 0 Comments