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Only FMLs I didn't vote on | All the FMLs

Today, after 3 long hours of mowing the lawn with a rusty lawn mower, my dad finally decided to tell me that he didn't get any money out to pay me with. The reason? He didn't think girls could mow a lawn and was expecting me to give up. FML

Today, I fell going down the stairs to the subway platform during rush hour. Someone was kind enough to help me up and someone else was kind enough to steal my iPhone which had fallen out of my pocket and landed nearby. FML

#15581921
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33768) - you deserved it (3534)

On 03/31/2011 at 10:42pm - money - by blegh - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized that the most romantic thing that my boyfriend and I have done in the last month is comb lice out of each other's hair. FML

#6260496
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32134) - you deserved it (10641)

On 11/11/2009 at 5:10pm - love - by kiwi (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me. Via text. With the iPhone I got him for our anniversary. FML

#5601325
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35630) - you deserved it (3532)

On 10/02/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by SezzyJ - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out my wife has been bribing my daughter to keep quiet about her affair with my boss. That would explain the iPhone 4S, the $500 shoes, the $200 purse, and the professional $300 haircut. They told me it was because she had straight A's. FML

#18302011
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44879) - you deserved it (3478)

On 11/20/2011 at 9:05pm - kids - by brokeandalone (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML

#18725237
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25860) - you deserved it (8831)

On 01/06/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while driving home, some idiot kept tailgating me, so I slowed down, hoping he'd overtake me. He didn't, so I pulled to the side of the road. He did the same, in front of me. He kept toying with me until I crashed into another car trying to speed away from him. FML

#21149457
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42988) - you deserved it (14274)

On 05/23/2014 at 6:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my wife of 5 years has decided to change everything: job, clothes, hair style, car, and me. FML

#18723513
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30017) - you deserved it (2639)

On 01/06/2012 at 2:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my horrible boss sent me a Facebook friend request for the fifth time, in her attempt to not only bother me at work, but also through social media. FML

#21254692
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32687) - you deserved it (2877)

On 09/08/2014 at 9:26pm - work - by notyourfriend (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML

#16972351
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29995) - you deserved it (13838)

On 07/04/2011 at 12:09pm - health - by hero to zero - United States (New York)

Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML

#20573161
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32814) - you deserved it (14137)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by nottoosmall - United States

Today, my dad came home from a trip to Arizona and brought back special hand-picked gifts for the whole family. When he got to me, he smiled, and pulled out a free lotion from the hotel at which he was staying. FML

#20729197
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42806) - you deserved it (3480)

On 06/16/2013 at 11:46am - misc - by loveyadad (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing with my pet rabbit when my boyfriend discovered poop on his lap. As he brushed it off, I reminded him that there are a lot worse things in the world than rabbit poop. Almost as if on cue, my rabbit peed on both of us. FML

#14497989
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11797) - you deserved it (18477)

On 01/07/2011 at 3:22pm - misc - by RabbitOwner - United States

Today, I was taking calls at the helpdesk I work at. The caller was a man, and while helping him with his issue he suddenly stopped to tell me I had a nice soothing voice. Then he told me to say something else. As I continued to help him, he started making moaning noises. I'm a guy. FML

#2372451
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51991) - you deserved it (3082)

On 05/28/2009 at 12:52pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
455 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7754) - you deserved it (55627)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

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