By bluerhhajfk - 19/08/2013 23:29 - United States - Providence

Today, I walked in on my brother smoking weed. He immediately tried to hide it by dropping it down his pants, still lit. Screaming in pain, he pulled down his pants. The ashes burned his knob. I had to take him to the emergency room. FML
I agree, your life sucks 44 730
You deserved it 3 572

bluerhhajfk tells us more.

Apparently his friend gave him some to try. He's only 14 so I don't think he knew any better. He told me he was experimenting, and I think that's an okay thing to do so long as he learned his lesson. He is just a young stupid teenager. Moral of the story: Don't do drugs, kids. Or you'll burn your penises.

Top comments

ewmoldycheese 14

But.. what if we don't have a penis? Are we safe to smoke weed then?


Jake_Hale 7

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For real #11? I'm glad I dont have a brother like you that would report me to the police for something like that. I'm sure you'd feign it off under a veil of 'for his own good' but it's just a shitty thing to do.

Are you serious? weed is dangerous? it is probably the healthiest drug in existence, no forget the probably, it is the healthiest drug in existence. its healthier than every single doctor prescribed, medicine and drug. not once in the entire history of the universe has any one gotten cancer from weed, died from it, overdosed on it.

Gotta love hyperbole #22 Anyway, this FML proves weed is in fact dangerous, or does it prove idiocy is dangerous? I'm gonna go with the latter. Idiots should come with a warning label :D

22 and 24 I see both your points and understand them, but if the brother was smoking illegally then he deserves to have cops called on him. I mean if OP was a cop would you want OP to just over look this because they're related? No. The world doesn't work like that.

if weed is dangerous, then why do doctors give it as a medicine. and why is it legal then?

It's mostly legal for medical use. I know it's illegal in my state except an official medical reason and judge by the brother's reaction it most likely illegal there too.

#27: He might or might not deserve that the cops will be called on him but he doesn’t deserve that his own brother or sister calls the cops. That’s how most families work. Smoking weed is a minor incident compared to such a betrayal by a close family member, and calling the cops would have long lasting consequences.

Oh grow up. It's not like he's smoking crack and shoved a hot pipe down his pants. It's weed. If it's safe for old people to smoke, it's safe for everyone. I would only be worried if he was 12. The only thing that I can come up with for it to be dangerous is if he smoked it all day every day and got fat and had a heart attack from the munchies.

#11: If I caught my brother smoking pot I'd talk to him about it and not treat him like a criminal and hurt his future with a record. If he was a hardcore meth/crack/heroin/etc drug user I'd call the Police as a last resort.

So 30 then OP should just ignore the law because of family ties? Small incident or not I wouldn't let any member of my family get away with something I know is wrong. If that makes me a bad person then fine.

32 whether it be crack or weed. if it's illegal then it's illegal that's the point.

#35 I personally would hate to be your family. If smoking a little bit of pot is the worse thing your family could do then I congratulate your family. You obviously don't deserve them. Also, get off of your pedestal and stop sticking your nose in the air. One day you'll do something worse than OP's bro.

40 I'm not sticking my nose in the air, I'm speaking what is right. If they told a doctor exactly what happened and the doctor called the cops would the doctor be wrong? If the brother was smoking somewhere on the streets and a random person saw and informed the police would said person be wrong? Family or not does matter.

First off docs don't call the cops unless an OD occurred, if there are kids involved or if someone was seriously harmed. You do know it is impossible to OD on pot right? Stop with all of these "What if this or that..". We get it, you are obviously very young with no experience or your just a snob that will do anything, even turn in your family member over a ******* joint because you need to show the world you're a good person. Would you like to know what the consequences for would be for that? A night or two in jail and the possibility of a fine. Big whoop. But here's the kicker. A record. It'll be harder to find a job, like it isn't hard enough already. Would you like to know what would probably be the consequences for you? People in your family disowning you over it. If you were legitimately worried at all you would sit so called family member down and talk to them about how it bothers you. Or you could mind your own ******* business.

And with that essay typed, I am no longer replying to your nonsense. Good day sir!

Oh how you couldn't be further from the truth. I'm not a good person what so ever. I'm the complete opposite I enjoy ruining the lives of others and I'm not as young as you may think. So what does it matter that the brother gets a record and have trouble finding a job it's his own fault and as for being disowned by family so what. I don't care for other people let alone family. I know the brother wouldn't get much but I just enjoy the simple idea of ruining part his future. It's just fun how you can do the right thing for the wrong reasons.

#35: I don’t know whether this makes you a bad person or just a weird person; I simply don’t want to argue about the correct English word to be used for, especially since I’m not that familiar with English. I’m just saying that you will be a very lonely person as soon as you have to deal with a situation where you act against a family member or close friend in order to keep up with your image of a law-abiding citizen and go to the police. To the people close to you - family and friends - you will become unreliable.

@49 I feel like the word for this fool would be 'douchebag' sense the person purposely tries to ruin people's lives. A lonely life is in order for this fool.

#54 I wouldn't even associate him with something I use to clean my lady parts with. Let's just say he's a hornswoggling curmudgeon.

monnanon 13

ok we get it weed is the wonder drug. it cures everything, it cant possibly be bad in any way. while i do agree that it is highly unlikely for someone to die from weed please remember that it is often mixed with othet substances that can cause damage. i wouldnt have anyone arrested for the occasional smoking of it but if it was a family member or my child i would talk to them about it. nothing is 100% safe. please stop dressing it up like it is and for thr record i would be just as unhappy with a friend who was a heavy coffee or alcohol drinker.

Oh look at all the people I pissed off. And 55 I thought you weren't responding anymore.

62. I do believe she said she's not responding to You. I don't believe in pot smoking. But I keep it to myself. If someone else wants to put it into their body, how is that my business. As long as they're not underage they can make their own choices. Get a life and stop trying to drag people down to your own no-life level.

Hey I can't help that I'm following the law and turning someone in. I just get the added bonus of having a bit of fun.

#62/66: At least you made this thread interesting by talking about your 'douchebag'-intention because this thread (I mean the replies to comment no. 1) accounts for roughly half of the entire comment page. Anyway, your comments weren’t good, just entertaining. By the way, 55 wasn’t responding to you.

66- with all your bullshit logic, I should call the cops on my mom for going over the speed limit or California rolling a stop sign. Get real. I would hate to be your family.

66 - There's a special place in hell for traitors.

#66, you most certainly can help it. You've been attempting to alleviate yourself of responsibility and justify the choices you would make in this discussion on the basis of being a citizen who does the "right" (legal) thing. But failing to recognize that things are usually not absolute and that the law does not always coincide with morality is highly unsophisticated (or possibly just inexperienced. Your posts radiate youthful ignorance, which is nothing to be proud of if you're not "as young as you seem"). If you're really the type who would call the cops in this situational for your own amusement (though I suspect that whole thing was an act put on to evade having to admit being wrong), then your efforts to defend yourself are futile, as that is a truly indefensible position.

I'm with #11. Weed is very dangerous. If you're stupid. For example, this one guy shoved a lit blunt down his pants and burned his dick.

All of you guys are so biased with your opinions. Yes, I'm more pro weed but you can't say that weed is this magical power that doesn't have any side effects. If you smoke it for a prolonged period, you have a chance of getting cancer or respitory problems. My buddy got cancer because of the fact that he's been smoking for over half his life. Weed definetly is not dangerous (safer than most of over the counter prescriptions) but it can have side effects.

#84 Your friend is full if shit. Forgive me if I an wrong but I am almost absolutely positive that weed has been shown to not cause cancer, infact right the opposite.

Sigh... I suppose as a smoker of weed myself (hence the username) I should give my own opinion and attempt at setting these idiots straight. 1) Whoever said they don't care about family (the retard who was saying he likes ruining people's lives), it's obvious you went through something in your life that turned you into such an insufferable cuntelope. Good. You deserved it. And with the way you are acting, it's going to continue happening. Good riddance. 2) Some complete idiot said something like (forgive me, I'm not bothering remembering every idiot's number) "if weed isn't dangerous then why is it illegal". Well, dumbass, I'm here to inform your clearly undeveloped and inexperienced child-like mind that not everything that's legal, is safe. Sorry to burst your bubble and brutally murder your innocence like that. Look at cigarettes. Do you know how many ******* poisons and chemicals they put in that? A shit ton. The 3 that stand out for me is rat poison, nicotine, and tar. I'd rather smoke weed than ******* inhale that legal shit. There are also legal ointments out there for helping deal with psoriasis and rosacea that have tar in them and can lead to cancer. Weed is safer. 3) Any of who "holier than thou" snobs who would turn your family in for smoking weed are backstabbing fucktards. Your family knows you best. Your family is there for you. Your family gives a shit about you. Why would you throw this away? Given all that, backstab your family and they know best how to make your life a living hell. What comes around goes around asshole. 4) Whoever was proving all these people these people wrong, (I think you had the word tickle in your username) good job. You know what you're talking about. Whoopee. 5) Some fun facts about weed. There's a theory going around that it helps prevent cancer. Does this make it dangerous? It's used as a painkiller and prescribed to people with painful injuries and insomnia. Yet you can't OD on it. Does this make it dangerous? Put it im brownies and life becomes even more awesome. ^_^ Does this make it dangerous? Think of it as having alcohol, but with better side effects. You go to sleep, no more physical pain, the possibility of reducing your chances for getting cancer, no ******* up your liver, etc. But with that said, you are still responsible for your actions while high and acting like an idiot is stupid. There was more I was gonna say but this is enough for now.

treveyon is hank and OPs brother is walt

Weed is different in every country. It's either legal, or illegal. And in this case... In pretty sure in illegal. OP, next time just say smoking because obviously nit-wits can't read and understand that this FML is about you witnessing your brother put a lit joint on his dingy

35- then you're an asshole and id shoot myself if you were my relative. I could see telling the police if he murdered someone or robbed something. But smoking weed? Really? You're one of THOSE people?

And by the way, calling the police won't do much. He can get rid of it and then what will they do? They dont care enough to give him a drug test or anything theyll say "dont do it again" and move on. Its happened to me before. Your brother wont be punished and instead he'll hate you.

aliiballybee 9

Oh my god... Are you stupid? I'd rather watch my brother smoke a joint and be relaxed rather than drink a lot of alcohol and become violent! Some sibling you are, 'call the police' you'd be disowned in an instant!

um #27 are you aware that weed was legalized in a few states in the US. for all we know the state they live in makes it perfectly legal. (my apologies if this has been said there are too many comments to go through)

Should we start commenting on the FML, now? Way too many arguments these days...

I think he should just mind his own ******* business.

ewmoldycheese 14

In accompaniment to the "I tried pot once, now i'm gay" advert: "I tried pot once. I set my **** on fire!" :')

Proof idiots handling weed is harmful.

You should've just smoked with him. and @2 Anything thats burning can harm someone, obviously. it has nothing to do with weed.

I think 2's comment was one of those jokes

If he were a redhead I bet he could, because both bushes would be burning :)

Pretty sure any colored bush would be burning at that point.

I guess the fire crotch joke was lost on you.

Well I guess he learned his lesson....

Jtx928 5

Quit walking in on people and let people have their privacy idiot

It's as easy as OP walked by his room and his door was open.

Go away #6. You don't know WHY she walked in so just,.. No. Stop

153- despite your profile being male, it doesn't say that on the FML. Dunno why.

perdix 29

That's gotta be in the sequel to "Reefer Madness!" The lengths some people will go to not share their weed! It may have cost him some length, and maybe some girth;)

Obviously people don't get the movie reference. I thought it was hilarious.. It's on Netflix instant for those who have not seen it and are interested.

Grauncho 27

This is our generation, guys.

Idiots come in all sizes, colours, and ages, you know

hcollins1 18

People who smoke weed come in all ages. Working at a fast food restaurant for 3 years, I've seen my fair share of old and young people smoking.

Are you a cop or is he fearful that you'll smoke all his weed?

Or he's afraid that OP will tell his parents?