By Anonymous - 30/5/2020 23:05 What a charmer Today, after surgery on Monday, I can’t do much because of where my scars are until they heal. My husband won’t clean the house at all, dishes are all over my kitchen bar, laundry is all piled up by the washing machine. When I asked for help, he said it’s not his job. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 You deserved it 6 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 30/5/2020 20:00 It never ends Today, I had a "nightmare" where I found out I had more homework than I originally realized, and spent the entire dream doing homework. There is no escape. FML I agree, your life sucks 230 You deserved it 25 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 30/5/2020 17:00 Call CPS! Today, I discovered via my webcam that my brother believes in teaching babies to self-soothe, which in practice means ignoring my baby until she stops crying, only changing the nappy once in the 7 hours I was at work, and forgetting to feed her at all because he’s too busy watching Netflix. FML I agree, your life sucks 418 You deserved it 60 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Madisson Tharp - 30/5/2020 14:00 Station 19 and a half Today, while working on an ambulance, I got a call from my boss saying I’m fired for being sick too often. I cried in front of every patient for the last seven hours of my shift. FML I agree, your life sucks 500 You deserved it 60 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By phlox_fml - 30/5/2020 08:00 Hammocking yourself Today, I fell backwards out of my hammock, busting my shoulder. This weekend, I broke my toe falling out of it. I've used hammocks my entire life, but have become apparently unable to during the lockdown. FML I agree, your life sucks 487 You deserved it 64 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wtf?! - 30/5/2020 05:00 Purple rain, purple rain Today, out of boredom, I decided to dye my hair. I clumsily spilled some of the purple dye on my chest and shoulders. My insane mother is convinced the marks are hickeys I got from sneaking out and having sex with a boyfriend I don’t even have. She won’t listen, and I’m grounded for a month. FML I agree, your life sucks 727 You deserved it 120 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Willow McGarrigle - 30/5/2020 02:00 Condom advertisement Today, my ex messaged me, saying he got his new girlfriend pregnant and that he thinks I have something to do with it. He thinks I put it in her head that they should have a kid together, when he says he didn't want any in the first place. FML I agree, your life sucks 741 You deserved it 60 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bananapie69 - 29/5/2020 23:00 Serial killer Today, during my staff Google Meet conference, I forgot to mute my mic when I joined and I was still listening to a true crime podcast. I started to notice people's confused looks and realized they were all hearing the details of the bodies found. FML I agree, your life sucks 549 You deserved it 447 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 29/5/2020 20:00 Addicted to love Today, I was half paying attention to a text message conversation with someone about how addicted we both were to social media. It's wasn't until deep into the conversation that I realized we were actually talking about porn. FML I agree, your life sucks 534 You deserved it 449 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bh2000 - 29/5/2020 17:00 Pay up Today, I'd purchased a ticket for the train on my mobile app. Some idiot pushed past me on his way out and in the process makes me drop my phone, ruining it. A conductor then came to check my ticket and I got fined 150 dollars. FML I agree, your life sucks 965 You deserved it 79 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 29/5/2020 14:00 Mr Whiskers Today, one of my friends was playing with a laser pointer. When he pointed it in my direction, I swatted at it away like it was a bug. Apparently, I'm part cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 627 You deserved it 189 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 29/5/2020 08:00 Overdoing it Today, my boyfriend convinced me to "dirty talk" with him. I'd never done it before, so I figured I would give it a go. I ended up getting so excited that I had an anxiety attack. FML I agree, your life sucks 880 You deserved it 166 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Miguel Ezpeleta - 29/5/2020 05:00 Never get involved Today, I was working for my cousin. However, two weeks ago I found out my cousin's wife was cheating on him, through lying to her best friend. I told him, and he later told her. They've apparently made up, because I got fired. FML I agree, your life sucks 973 You deserved it 119 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By thanks ma - 29/5/2020 02:00 Today, on Judge Judy… Today, all of my credit cards were frozen due to fraud. The culprit? My own mother. She rationalized it by saying I "owed" her for raising me. She didn’t even raise me. My grandma did. FML I agree, your life sucks 1334 You deserved it 56 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By EdibleCape - 28/5/2020 23:00 Nerves of steel Today, I went out with my best girl friend to spice up my wardrobe. I recently broken up with my girlfriend, who was constantly flip-flopping from being in love with me to being apathetic towards me. After having a great day, on the way home my ex pulled up next to our car and I had a panic attack. FML I agree, your life sucks 1047 You deserved it 205 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By oGxFoopFoop - 28/5/2020 20:00 Shit's going down Today, I was taking a shit in my friend's bathroom when his brother's girlfriend walked in. Nobody decided to tell me that the lock didn’t work. FML I agree, your life sucks 1035 You deserved it 107 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 28/5/2020 17:00 Asking for it Today, my crush and I were talking about hypothetical situations. I told her, "I love you hypothetically." She said, "I love me too." I even got rejected hypothetically. FML I agree, your life sucks 859 You deserved it 476 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By guiltyschuldig49 - 28/5/2020 14:00 Noise annoys Today, and for months, my upstairs neighbor has been stomping on their floors, hard enough to shake our walls. We thought it was their child, but found out it’s the mother. She took up running, and due to the pandemic, she does it in the living room. She's already been told to stop. Repeatedly. I work 12-hour nights. FML I agree, your life sucks 1356 You deserved it 85 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 28/5/2020 08:00 Lemon or haunted? Today, our boiler broke. Yesterday, it was our fridge. The day before that, the deck collapsed, and a few weeks ago the dishwasher flooded the kitchen. This is after we spent a ton of money to have the house gutted due to a mold problem. We only bought the house a year ago, and have lived in it even less. We need to move. FML I agree, your life sucks 1251 You deserved it 120 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 28/5/2020 05:00 Alexa, play "Living Doll" by Cliff Richard Today, my boyfriend dumped me out of nowhere, supposedly because I act like he's nothing but a sex doll. We've been dating 6 weeks and have had sex twice. FML I agree, your life sucks 1184 You deserved it 122 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 28/5/2020 02:00 Looks aren't everything Today, I was watching "My 600-lb Life". Most of the people on the show are married or in relationships. I cant even find a relationship. FML I agree, your life sucks 984 You deserved it 229 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 27/5/2020 23:00 British Broadcasting Corporation Today, working from home due to the quarantine, things were going slow so I typed "Lola Fox BBC DP porn" into my team chat, thinking I was typing it into my browser. My supervisor took it down as soon as it happened, but people definitely saw. FML I agree, your life sucks 328 You deserved it 1958 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 27/5/2020 20:00 "Now, I ain't sayin' she a gold digger…" Today, my wife wants a divorce. Apparently, she only married me for my potential, since my twin brother is a lawyer, she hoped I’d become a success as well, but since I’m content to be a carpenter, she considers me a disappointment and a failure. FML I agree, your life sucks 1832 You deserved it 108 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 27/5/2020 17:00 Fish and chips is life Today, my husband had his hands full with the shopping, so I was carrying the baby and the bag with our takeaway in it. I tripped down the steps and fell over. Did my husband ask if I or the baby were OK? Nope. But he did ask if I’d squashed his fish and chips. FML I agree, your life sucks 1282 You deserved it 158 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 27/5/2020 14:00 Scarred Today, my niece asked why my veins were so close to my skin. She was referring to my stretch marks. FML I agree, your life sucks 1012 You deserved it 120 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By my eyes!! - 27/5/2020 08:00 Knock next time Today, I walked in on my husband's elderly parents getting it on. It’s beautiful they still love each other, I just wish they hadn’t decided to express that love on our living room sofa. FML I agree, your life sucks 1369 You deserved it 117 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cpiro - 27/5/2020 05:00 Live from the chopper Today, my friend borrowed my car and decided to get pulled over after a high speed chase. My car got towed in a town over 100 miles away. Choose your friends wisely. FML I agree, your life sucks 1227 You deserved it 246 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 27/5/2020 02:00 It's a marathon, not a sprint Today, I found out that the last girl from my graduating high school class is engaged to her boyfriend. I'm now the only guy from high school who's still single and I'm not even 30 yet. FML I agree, your life sucks 957 You deserved it 221 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 26/5/2020 23:00 Incognito browsing Today, my dad is super overprotective and can view my search history through his phone. I'd downloaded the Google app to be able search for things he wouldn't approve of. I just realized I've been making all these searches on my school account. I go to a private school and they can view my search history. FML I agree, your life sucks 646 You deserved it 1531 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By JessicaandGhazi - 26/5/2020 20:00 Expanding universe Today, I told my BFF that I went to the store to buy medium shirts because I had gained some weight during coronavirus. He asked me, "What's the point in doing that when you're getting so fat, those wont even fit in 2 weeks?" FML I agree, your life sucks 1246 You deserved it 279 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today I had to finally give my boyfriend an ultimatum. Either he at least trims his giant mass of unruly pubes or no more sex. I feel I have no choice... I agree, your life sucks 8 You deserved it 0 0 Comments
After finally putting my foot down and trying to kick my husband out for his alcoholism, I got a three hour lecture from his parents about how much of... I agree, your life sucks 6 You deserved it 0 0 Comments
Today, I was half paying attention to a text message conversation with someone about how addicted we both were to social media. It's wasn't until deep... I agree, your life sucks 534 You deserved it 449 3 Comments
Today, my boyfriend convinced me to "dirty talk" with him. I'd never done it before, so I figured I would give it a go. I ended up getting so excited that... I agree, your life sucks 880 You deserved it 166 2 Comments