Your everyday life stories

588

Today, I finally got a cable box for my TV. When I was connecting the cable, my tv fell and shattered the screen. FML

By icy - 6/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Prairieville

Not fair!

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Today, I was walking to the bus stop for school. And the bus drove past me, I chased it and fell in a puddle, my boyfriend was in the bus, and he laughed. FML

By yolomane - 6/12/2019 01:00

He does not care!

682

Today, I received my package. I ordered a vibrator, I was so excited to use it, but when I was finally ready to use it, I found out that it broke during the delivery. FML

By Anonymous - 5/12/2019 20:00

Broken vibrator

796

Today, I was in the middle of having sex with my boyfriend, and my drunk best friend knocked on our door. We screamed 'go away' and she still opened the door. She then saw us, and asked if she can join. FML

By Anonymous - 5/12/2019 18:00

Crazy best friend

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Today, I was teaching a high school calculus class. I wrote a complex formula on the board. As I wrote, students asked if they could take a picture of the board and circulate it. I said yes, and I was pleased as everybody seemed to be taking pictures. Soon, I realized why: my skirt was tucked into my underwear. Within a few minutes, every student in the school had an email with a picture of my ugliest pair of floral-printed panties. FML

By Anonymous - 5/12/2019 14:00

Taking pictures

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Today, a man I have sex with sent me a video of him, not fucking but MAKING LOVE to a girl we had a threesome with, he's in love with me, but the girl is in love with him, what a sham of a threesome. FML.

By Gal - 5/12/2019 05:00

Sham of a threesome

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Today, we went to our grandmother's house. I have to share a room with my parents, I suffer from insomnia. So I'm stuck trying to pretend to sleep while I hear my mom fingering herself loudly. FML

By "Gamessence" - 5/12/2019 01:00

Insomnia

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Today, I tried to have a game night at my house. Suggesting a popular card game that everyone plays, snacks, and BYOB. No one showed or even said they weren't coming. FML

By Anonymous - 4/12/2019 20:00

Where is everyone?

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Today, while my boyfriend was fingering me, he accidentally pulled out my NuvaRing, he then licked it off and placed it back inside me. FML

By Oregon - 4/12/2019 18:00

Does it taste good?

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Today, I found out that my older brother has been watching incest porn. I am now scared to go home whenever he's there. FML

By Anonymous - 4/12/2019 14:00 - Australia - Bentley

A frightening brother!

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Today, my mom took me to Hooters and I couldn't help, but stare at our waitress... well, her chest. My mom called me out on this and when I got mad at her, she replied, “What? Just because she has large breasts doesn't mean you need to stare at them! You don't see her staring at your tiny penis! FML

By jorgevasquez12 - 4/12/2019 05:00

Staring at...

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Today, my parents went through my room and found a journal that I started writing in 2 years ago up until now. They read it and now they know I'm bisexual, and my favorite pastime is listening to them having sex. FML

By Orange - 4/12/2019 01:00

What is my pastime?

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Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky when we decide to try the old 69. One thing leads to another when her clit ring went deep into my nose, and leaving me feeling like the wrong kind of bull. FML

By buckerooo - 3/12/2019 20:00

Too much feeling!

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Today, my father-in-law caught me, a lesbian, buying condoms. He thought I was cheating. I didn’t know how to tell him that his daughter is allergic to our dildo.

By Notcheating - 3/12/2019 18:00

Not a cheating!

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Today, my girlfriend planned our day, she wanted to play FIFA before having sex. I won 11-0. She stormed out of the room, went home and isn't picking my calls / texting back. It's been 12 hours. FML

By "Tarun Kumar" - 3/12/2019 14:00

Her plan!

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Today, I asked my parents to stop posting pictures of me and my ex-girlfriend on Facebook. They said no because “she’s still nice to them”, despite the fact that she cheated on me and sexually assaulted me. FML

By seriouslywtf - 3/12/2019 03:00

Selfish parents

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Today, I was doing the laundry and changing the bed sheets. I found most of my underwear under my step daughters bed, when I asked her, she said that she liked the way they smelled. FML

By Anonymous - 2/12/2019 19:00 - Australia

Smell good

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Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex and he thrusted too fast. It caused him to come out of me and he tried to shove himself back into me just as quick. It was the wrong hole. I now know and feel the term, 'ripping you a new one.' FML

By Kaylee_Knudsen - 2/12/2019 20:00 - United States - Seattle

Ripping you a new one

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Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

By - 2/12/2019 18:00

She plays tricks on me

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Today, I found out my boyfriend, who is buying me a ring for my birthday is buying my best friend a ring that cost 10 times more than mine. FML

By Lovesucks - 2/12/2019 14:00 - United Arab Emirates - Dubai

Is she better than me?

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Today, I was really excited to go to a party because I need to make more friends. Too bad a snowstorm hit right before I was going to leave, now I'm alone with no power. FML

By LonelyStranger - 2/12/2019 05:00 - United States - Lake Stevens

Alone

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Today, my 4 year old daughter got royally annoyed at my uncle who won't stop surprise tickling her by poking her waist. When he went for another, she punched him square on the nose, making him a laughing stock. Not accepting that he got owned, he started preaching about child discipline to me. FML

By Shut up loser! - 2/12/2019 03:00

Not her fault neither mine

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Today, I'm stuck with sleeping in the same room as my mother. The problem? Her snores are extremely loud and a full minute long. I'm not kidding, I timed it. FML

By - 1/12/2019 14:00 - United States - Tallahassee

Loud and long

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Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

By - 1/12/2019 20:00

Picture game

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Today, I had a dream that I had secret sex with Dumbledore more than once. FML

By anonymous - 1/12/2019 14:00 - United States - Oklahoma City

Secret sex

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Today, my boyfriend of five years finally gave me "a ring." Oh no, not an "engagement ring." He gave me a "ring to apologize for sleeping with his married coworker." FML

By Single Sally - 1/12/2019 05:00 - United States - Brandon

For what occasion

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Today, I had sex with a friend. It was really good too! Until she kicked me in my right nut while changing positions. FML

By man down! man down... - 1/12/2019 03:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Change it!

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Today, I was driving by the carnival and I really had to use the bathroom. I saw a porta-potty next to a house, so I parked in their front yard to use the bathroom very quickly. I came out to see a group of teenage boys urinating on my car. FML

By trippiex - 30/11/2019 20:00

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Today, my husband left his cell phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being a very curious person, I decided to call "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

By - 30/11/2019 20:00

Curiosity!

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