FML : Your everyday life stories

Funniest FMLs of the Day

Weirdest FMLs of the Day Most Commented FMLs of the Day

Man Ignites Home Trying To Burn Spiders

Here we go again...

By Gloria Borger - / Thursday 25 October 2018 17:35 / United States - New York

Today, a bear dragged my neighbor's garbage across the street and stopped right in the middle of my front yard, where it proceeded to scatter the contents and have a feast. When it was finished, it took a massive dump on my lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By idrow - / Thursday 25 October 2018 22:08 /

Food Coma

Let me just take a quick nap...

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By FML Videos - / Thursday 25 October 2018 12:30 / United States - New York

World

Philippines

Today, I was at the mall with my 7-year-old granddaughter. When we entered a clothing store, she pulled me back, saying loudly, "Grandma! This is 'Forever 21'! 'Currently 58' is down that way!" I blame my son for this little troll. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Damn millennials! - / Thursday 25 October 2018 23:45 / Philippines - Taguig

David Schwimmer Responds To Police Hunt For Look-Alike

Ross? Is that you?

By Gloria Borger - / Thursday 25 October 2018 17:17 /

Today, I had to get a pre-exposure rabies vaccine for school. My boyfriend thinks I'll give him rabies and refuses to let me sleep in the same bed with him or initiate sex. I need two more shots over the next 3 weeks, which means sleeping on the couch for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By VetTechStudent - / Thursday 25 October 2018 15:30 /

Today, I was fired from the job I've had for 15 years. My boss recently hired his daughter as a senior manager and she made several cuts because, as she put it, the sales team was "too old and lame". I didn't know being a young bitch was a requirement to work at a furniture warehouse. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Anonymous - / Thursday 25 October 2018 08:00 / United States - Floral Park

Today, my husband started a new job as an OTR truck driver. He was assigned one week of home time each month, which happens to be the same exact week my period comes every month. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Nosexever? - / Thursday 25 October 2018 13:30 /

World

Australia

Today, 4 weeks after I told my housemate I was moving out, she told me she expects me to continue paying rent beyond when I leave, despite giving her plenty of notice. Now I'm dealing with lawyers and it's more drama than I can handle. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By screwedover - / Thursday 25 October 2018 06:00 / Australia

Today, after a year and a half of growing out my hair, I decided to get it trimmed at a Superclips. I walked in with a full head of hair and I left bald. At least it was free. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By twofade - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 23:00 / United States

Today, my boyfriend bought me a vibrator for my birthday. Sounds sweet, right? Then he invited my 10/14-year-old cousins to our house. They surprised me in my room. While I was using it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Ohgodhelpme - / Thursday 25 October 2018 03:00 /

Don't Look...

It's always disappointing!

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You deserved it

By FML Videos - / Thursday 25 October 2018 00:30 /

Student Suspended For Clever Backpack Ban Protest

No backpacks? Fine. I'll use something else...

By Gloria Borger - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 23:30 /

Today, after months of being told I'm just being paranoid, my hallmates admitted and proved that there really is a dorm-wide conspiracy to socially isolate me. I don’t know what I did wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Depressed and clueless - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 15:00 / United States - Manhattan

Gym Motivation

You can do it!

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By FML Videos - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 12:30 / United States - New York

Today, it was my first day going to work with new hours where I'm in the office alone for an hour. I managed to lock myself out without my jacket, my phone, and my keys. It was raining. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Veronica Rambo - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 17:30 /

Robbers Arrested After Coming Back For More

Crime doesn't pay, kids.

By Gloria Borger - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 16:00 /

Today, I had a lovely gluten-free pizza out at a local restaurant. After I'd finished, they informed me it wasn't in fact gluten-free. I am Celiac and this means I will be ill for the next six weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By mrosewrosem - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 15:30 /

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. When she saw the ring, she got so excited that she ran to kiss me and it flew out of my hand, over the balcony of our suite, and fell roughly 45 stories straight down. I could feel my wallet screaming as a £4000 diamond vanished into the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Anonymous - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 14:00 /

Today, I saw Niagra Falls. Not the one in Canada, but the one that was released when I went to check on my period at work. I had no change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Red Face, too - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 13:30 /

Today, I went on a coffee date. It turned out to be a mistake - not because he was bad, but because I forgot how much coffee upsets my stomach. Yup, it makes me need to poop, and I did. In my jeans. As he drove me home. Not quite the "run" of fun we’d planned. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Loose Goose - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 12:00 /

Today, it's 3:42am and my son is crying because I won't let him play with his dirty diaper. FML

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You deserved it

By Angela17 - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 05:00 /

Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML

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You deserved it

By peridot1aa - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 03:00 /

Sit Up Struggles

Too relatable.

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You deserved it

By FML Videos - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 00:30 /

Giant Inflatable Colon Stolen From Hospital

They just want their colon back!

By Gloria Borger - / Tuesday 23 October 2018 23:55 /

Today, after taking a massive shit, I flushed the toilet and it clogged. It flooded to the brim and the shit came rising to the top. I didn't know what to do so I grabbed some toilet paper and picked it up, ran to my balcony, and launched it. It landed on my neighbor's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Malakai - / Tuesday 23 October 2018 22:00 /

Today, I got high-fived in the face by a jellyfish. Twice. #FML @KillingerExp

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By @KillingerExp - / Tuesday 23 October 2018 14:10 / United States - New York

Today, I was walking around my block when a random stranger pulled up next to me. He assumed I was a woman, and started catcalling me. I'm a 34-year-old man with a wife and kids, and my hair isn't even long. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By B-377 - / Tuesday 23 October 2018 11:30 / United States - Sarver

Urine-Soaked Seat Ruins Couple's Vacation

Not even business class is safe.

By Gloria Borger - / Tuesday 23 October 2018 10:15 / United States - New York

Today, I witnessed a postal worker with an important parcel stopping before knocking on my door, shrugging, getting back in his van, and driving away. I couldn't get the door open quickly enough before he left. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Millar - / Wednesday 24 October 2018 00:30 / Australia - Carlton North

FML

Nearly

Today we left the cat alone all day for the first time in months. Came back home 11.5 hours later to three enormous puddles of vomit. We then spent $450...

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You deserved it

Today, I received a notice that I’m being fined for failure to renew my Florida license. I’ve lived in Maryland for the last seven years and I’ve never...

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You deserved it

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World

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Philippines

Today, I was at the mall with my 7-year-old granddaughter. When we entered a clothing store, she pulled me back, saying loudly, "Grandma! This is 'Forever...

Australia

Today, 4 weeks after I told my housemate I was moving out, she told me she expects me to continue paying rent beyond when I leave, despite giving her plenty...

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Photos

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Spicy

Today, my girlfriend sent me a video of herself masturbating so I could watch it on my business trip. As I was watching it, I realised someone was filming...

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

Today, I got to see my fiancé for the first time in 3 months. While we were having sex for the first time, he slipped out and slammed into the back of...

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You deserved it

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