All the FMLs

Party time!

By LegallyBored - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Canada - Regina

Today, my roommate went away for the weekend so she could hook up with a guy from Tinder that she's never met. This wouldn't be a problem if we hadn't already made plans for my 18th birthday, which is also today. Here's to a night of Netflix with my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 028

You deserved it 693

Mean girls

By Brahman punjabi - 26/06/2026 15:00 - United States - New York

Today, I'm an Indian man at college and I'm nicknamed "Uber Eats" by half the campus. Every time I walk around, I hear, "Look, it's Uber Eats." I shout at them and demand that they stop but they just laugh at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 23

I can fix him

By John - 26/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Hampton

Today, I found out that my girlfriend still hangs out with her "abusive, violent, psychotic, misogynistic, manipulative" ex. I told her to block him and she pitched a mega tantrum. Now I'm single again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 29

Step-dad no more

By MAN THINGS fuck you - 26/06/2026 09:00 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, I told my boyfriend to stop criticizing my son for his table manners. He said, "It's man things, you wouldn't understand." He acted surprised when I blew my top and told him to leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88

You deserved it 167

Can't win

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my supervisor told me off for doing something. When I reminded her that she told me to do it, she yelled at me for correcting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 507

You deserved it 192

Stuck

By Anonymous - 26/06/2026 03:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, I was in and out of my room to cook dinner at 11:30pm and accidentally locked the door. I couldn't jimmy it by myself so called a locksmith who used two of those inflatable car door things and a screwdriver to pop it in 30 seconds flat. Cost me 180 bucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 166

The Apprentice coded

By Anonymous - 26/06/2026 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, as part of a group project, we are spending a week with the guys who design Formula 1 cars. The role was I assigned was marketing and merchandise, so while the rest of my team get to talk to engineers and work on real engines, I’m sat designing T-shirts and writing fake magazine articles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 234

You deserved it 45

Old school internet athiest

By Fuck you bitch - 25/06/2026 22:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I yet again had to endure one of my patients talking about how their "faith in God" helped them. No bitch, the MEDICINE helped you, not your fake "God" who hates queer people like me. I wish I could yank your IV and see how much help "God" is to you then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 385

I won't share you

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 20:00 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, it's week four of my best friend, who "wasn't interested", still being on a drunken bender after I told her I was possibly going to see someone new. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 226

You deserved it 46

Wine about it

By ojskyguy - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Pearl

Today, I knocked over and broke one of two very expensive wine bottles. As I was using the mop to clean it up, the handle knocked over and broke the other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 524

You deserved it 9 077

Clifford lives

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was transferring video from my camera to my laptop so I could start editing my film project. My wife’s badly behaved dog decided to barrel through my office, knocking everything over. Screen shattered, camera broken, video files corrupted due to the cable coming out mid-transfer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294

You deserved it 82

Referees

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Newark

Today, my very very loud upstairs neighbor's children got ahold of athletic whistles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 33

Not worth a divorce, but still…

By NotMyFault - 25/06/2026 09:00 - Germany

Today, my husband scraped his shin while trying to pull down our window blinds. He screamed and shouted at me, because it was "all my fault." How? I opened the blinds the day before, and rolled them up "too high." I'm staying married despite all this toxicity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 242

You deserved it 136

Invaded

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2020 but it's good stuff

Today, I put solar lights in my yard to finally figure out what my dog has been chasing over the fence at night. It's rats. She's been chasing rats that have invaded my backyard every night for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 499

You deserved it 192

Firehose

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 03:00 - United States - Cleveland

Today, my is still peeing on the toilet seat and floor. When will it get better? My son is 18 years-old and apparently can’t aim in the toilet. I had to sit on the pee he left on the toilet seat the other day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 242

Muffled

By Anonymous - 25/06/2026 00:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was driving to get groceries when my muffler fell off. I need to get it fixed or else I’ll lose my job, and my job is far away from where I live. If I take an Uber or anything, it will be taking most of my paycheck. Man, FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 51

Post-truth world

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, I caught my dad cheating on my stepmom with a man, and I took pictures. She dismissed them as AI-generated and accused me of trying to break them up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 74

I hope not

By Sarah - 24/06/2026 20:00 - United States - The Bronx

Today, I pooped my pants for the first time, ever. At least since I was a baby. I just turned 38; is this what getting older looks like? FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 65

Excavation time

By yankesik - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Poland - Kalisz

Today, I sneezed hard while eating some quite spicy potato chips at my friend's house. Some of the chips passed to the nasal cavity, and I ended up having to pick my nose for some pointy, spicy chips shrapnel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 523

You deserved it 1 881

A bit of an overreaction

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I found out that the reason my ex-fiance didn't visit me in the hospital after my accident, which I dumped him for, was because the hospital wouldn't let him in because he wasn't family. He's blocked my number, returned the ring and everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 594

Meddling

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Augusta

Today, I received a letter from the doctor's office saying that I'd missed an appointment and could be dropped as a patient if I missed another. My mom scheduled the appointment for me without my knowledge, and never told me that I had one. I also can't make it to any appointments right now, because my car broke down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328

You deserved it 65

You're ruining everything

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I hate what my beloved Renaissance Faires have become. Hardly anyone dresses in period-accurate garb anymore. Everything is all dumb mushrooms, slutty “fairies”, and pirates. None of which existed in the time period we’re supposed to be in. Nothing authentic at all! FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 211

Road rage

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 044

You deserved it 34 339

Passionate secret

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 03:00 - Bangladesh

Today, my boyfriend came to my room and we were kissing. He was being exceptionally aggressive and intense when my brother knocked outside my door, demanding I open it. He had to jump out while I was fumbling to fix my top and cover my marks with my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 302

Don't neglect yourself

By Anonymous - 24/06/2026 00:00 - United States - Rialto

Today, I had to send a camper home before the summer session was up. She was very upset and cussed me out. I was then cussed out by her parents when they came to pick her up. She was sent home for refusal to shower and her bunk mates all complained about the corpse-like stench. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 82

Noise annoys

By Stacey02 - 23/06/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, a quiet afternoon at the library turned stressful when my phone started blasting music. Every attempt to silence it somehow increased the volume. After seconds of panic, I realised the sound wasn't coming from my phone. It was a kid's toy buried somewhere in my backpack after a visit from my niece. The reading room people still glared at me like I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 88

Sounds like a catch

By Tina - 23/06/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I was wedding dress shopping. My fiance is only paying for the dress if I buy a size 10 or under. I’m currently a size 18. Apparently, this will give me “incentive to get in shape for the wedding.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 177

So, thanks for having me

By kernelkat - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out the presentation I've been looking forward to and preparing for months only has three people registered to attend. I'll be talking to an empty room for an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 015

You deserved it 2 724

What did you ACTUALLY do?

By Anonymous - 23/06/2026 15:00 - United States - Dayton

Today, I got dumped, so I was sad. I was so unpopular in my friend group that everyone but two people "sided with my ex" in their words; the other two "didn't side." I'd told my ex that I hated her, so I asked my friend to tell her I'm sorry, my ex-friend then replied with death threats. Like WHAT? FML

I agree, your life sucks 78

You deserved it 354

Never gonna happen

By Fuck the rich - 23/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Norfolk

Today, my dad explained to me that it's actually a "good thing" that we have a trillionaire in America now, because he builds rockets, and those are cool or something. WEALTH. TAX. NOW. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 267

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The Top

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 061

You deserved it 4 977

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house, I heard him shout, "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, get back here!" He was talking to his cat who'd run out the door behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 840

You deserved it 3 442

Today, I put on the same jeans that I had left in a bundle in my bedroom the day before. A few hours later, my boxer shorts decided to make their spectacular reappearance trick at the bottom of my leg in the middle of one of my meetings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 103

You deserved it 11 627

Today, our baby cries constantly, except for when our grumpy old feral tom cat comes over to lay beside her, lick her head and so on. This bastard cat is the most ornery sumbitch I've ever met and bites worse than a bear trap, yet he's a better dad than I am. Plus, he looks so damn smug while he's doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 274

Today, I got my report card, and thought I did pretty well with a GPA of 3.58. My parents freaked out over the 3 B's I had, and proceeded to look up which colleges would still accept me. I just finished my first quarter as a freshman in high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 253

You deserved it 125

Today, I found out during my eleventh year anniversary with my husband that he was cheating on me with his recently deceased friend's girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 81