Motherly Love · This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff ·United States

Hello? Is it me you're looking for?

Today, I was at the airport to pick up my mother since my baby is due soon. As she arrived, I smiled wide and opened my arms for a hug, but she walked right by me. Apparently, being pregnant makes me unrecognizable. My husband and I had to tell it her was me, her own daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 305 You deserved it 3 030

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Anonymous · 11 October 2026, 03:00 ·United States

Unacceptable!

Today, I went through another breakup. This will be my fourth in two years. None of them could handle or accept that I'm still best friends with my ex-husband, who is actually gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 You deserved it 31

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Anonymous · 11 October 2026, 00:00 ·Ringsted, Denmark

Nervous Nelly

Today, I thought I'd try to play Marvel Rivals, but my anxiety over having to interact with other people got so bad I panicked and never made it past the main menu. I really wanted to make friends or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 You deserved it 42

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Anonymous · 10 October 2026, 22:00 ·United Kingdom

Not going out

Today, I asked my husband if I should wear my black or red heels with my dress. He looked me up and down from the sofa and said, “We needed to leave 45 minutes ago to have any prayer of getting there on time, I'm now watching TV, so you and your heels please leave me alone now.” Oops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 You deserved it 321

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jshibbz0993 · This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff ·United States

Cheap and gross

Today, I was complaining to my boyfriend about our excessive water bill. He then says, "Don't look at me, I don't even shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 665 You deserved it 6 139

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Anonymous · 10 October 2026, 12:00 ·United Kingdom

How? Why? What?

Today, via the power of crooked lawyers, it is possible for a husband to dump all three kids on his ex-wife whilst keeping the house for himself and paying no child support. I’m the ex-wife, and my three kids are sharing a blanket on my dad's sofa, with school in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 239 You deserved it 75

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Anonymous · 10 October 2026, 09:00 ·United Kingdom

What have I done now?

Today, my girlfriend caught the bouquet at her friend's wedding, then shook them in my face like an accusation. I joined in the laughing with everyone else, but it put her in a mood, and she now hasn’t spoken to me in two days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201 You deserved it 76

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caught out · This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff ·London, United Kingdom

Toilet humour

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 900 You deserved it 7 481

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Anonymous · 10 October 2026, 03:00 ·Conneaut, United States

Gonna miss you

Today, my baby goat was diagnosed with a liver shunt. There is no treatment, not even reasonable palliative care. She will be euthanized tomorrow and a necropsy will be performed to make sure. Her sire can no longer be used for breeding, either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 226 You deserved it 32

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Anonymous · 10 October 2026, 00:00 ·United States

Thanks mom

Today, I learned that I may have lung cancer. I've never smoked a day in my life but it could be from secondhand smoke exposure from all the years of my mom smoking around me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313 You deserved it 44

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Anonymous · 9 October 2026, 20:00 ·Toronto, Canada

Second opinion

Today, despite me getting my period every two weeks and bleeding heavily enough that I faint if I move too fast, my doctor told me that it's normal and to just "take it easy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 339 You deserved it 37

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Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff ·United States

Harsh but fair

Today, I had to pick up my drunk mom at bar. While we were driving home, she thanked me over and over again, and then said, "Thank god you have no life!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 978 You deserved it 4 549

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SisterDharma · 9 October 2026, 15:00 ·Oakland, United States

Shook

Today, I was watching a Facebook reel of this guy who tried to kill a giant spider with a shoe. All of a sudden the spider disappeared, then came running up his arm towards me so fast it spooked the fuck outta me and I threw my phone hard as hell down the stairs! The worst part is I’m sure he knew that was gonna happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 You deserved it 256

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Anonymous · 9 October 2026, 12:00 ·Brighton, United States

Values over money

Today, I'm a game dev with hardly any money at the moment, and I got offered to sell my game's source code for a fat stack of cash to train AI models. I refused because I don't want to be replaced, but I feel bad because I'm still poor af. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291 You deserved it 86

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Anonymous · 9 October 2026, 09:00 ·United Kingdom

A knight's fail

Today, my boys fight a lot, and I watched as one of them revealed he bought a frigging knight's shield to protect himself, so his brother punched the shield, which flew backwards, hit him in the mouth and broke a tooth. I could not make this up if I tried. JUST GET ALONG ALREADY! FML

I agree, your life sucks 116 You deserved it 196

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soundslikeadumbcommentersituation · This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff ·Brampton, Canada

Hear this?

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 072 You deserved it 7 010

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Anonymous · 9 October 2026, 03:00 ·United States

Who?

Today, a customer got pissed off and called me a "libtard" simply because I admitted that I had absolutely no clue who Charlie Kirk was, but I'm the one in trouble for telling him to GTFO because I don't take crap from people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 252 You deserved it 137

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Anonymous · 9 October 2026, 00:00 ·United States

Free ride

Today, I went to the Cheesecake Factory and treated myself to an appetizer, an entree, a dessert, and some cocktails. The bill was higher than I expected and I was $50 short. I faked having a food allergy and had the staff call 911 so they could take me to the hospital, so I would get out of paying. It worked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 You deserved it 545

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BB_Skylar · 8 October 2026, 22:00 ·Johnson City, United States

Bad timing

Today, I was diagnosed with Bell's palsy. I have exams tomorrow and I have interviews for residency coming up. Sadly, the left half of my face will not work for another two months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 328 You deserved it 42

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Anonymous · 8 October 2026, 20:00 ·Dallas, United States

No time for tears

Today, my wife caught me crying over her miscarriage and she started yelling and screaming at me to "man up" because she should be the sad one, not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 446 You deserved it 55

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Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff ·Kiev, Ukraine

This is a robbery

Today, I was walking to the movie theatre with my boyfriend, when three guys muscled over and told us to hand over our phones. My boyfriend didn't waste any time pushing past me and running like hell, leaving me in tears and almost having a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 518 You deserved it 3 118

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Anonymous · 8 October 2026, 15:00 ·Pomona, United States

Risky Google search

Today, my girlfriend freaked out because I tried to introduce her to me being a Little. Instead of hearing me out or trying to learn anything real about the lifestyle, she just called me a sick pervert because of all the bad crap people write about us online. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 You deserved it 419

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Kylaisnefarious · 8 October 2026, 12:00 ·Brewer, United States

High times

Today, I was heating up my rig and about to do a dab when the rig piece fell out onto my hotel blanket, melting it, and getting plastic on the rig. Then I went to fan the smoke detector and I grabbed a pizza box, not thinking about if it was empty or not, and pizza flew everywhere as I fanned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 You deserved it 469

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Anonymous · 8 October 2026, 09:00 ·Whistler, Canada

The death knell

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me for asking to spend time with him after not seeing him very much in three months, because he doesn’t have time for me and is so stressed out he doesn’t have time for fun. Then he decided he should go to Mexico with the people he works and lives with so they could have fun together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265 You deserved it 66

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Lithiac · This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff ·Ocala, United States

Nice girl

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 828 You deserved it 4 870

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Anonymous · 8 October 2026, 03:00 ·United Kingdom

Pissed off

Today, I caught my husband peeing into the bath. His excuse was that he was simply too tired to pay enough attention to aim properly into the toilet bowl, this way he could just undo his zip, piss without even opening his eyes, then go to bed. I married a wild animal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 266 You deserved it 90

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I hate my lungs · 8 October 2026, 00:00 ·Montreal, Canada

On fire

Today, my parents have smoked for most of their lives and are both healthy as horses. Meanwhile, I smoked for two years, then went through hell quitting, and just had my first asthma attack and was lectured about "long term effects of tobacco, even after cessation." THIS IS BULLSHIT! FML

I agree, your life sucks 224 You deserved it 190

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Anonymous · 7 October 2026, 22:00 ·Saint Venera, Malta

The Betrayal

Today, I found out my boyfriend of 6 years and fiancé has been secretly dating and hooking up with my step-sister behind my back. Now she's pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434 You deserved it 53

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She still loves me. Somehow. · 7 October 2026, 20:00 ·New York, United States

Bad dad

Today, my family and my fiancée's family met each other and my worst fear came true. My asshole dad found out my fiancée's dad is a reverend and his first sentence was, "How's the molestation business these days?" It didn't take long before a brawl erupted and we were kicked out. I'm cutting him off for good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358 You deserved it 83

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Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff ·San Francisco, United States

Full blast

Today, I decided to bring down a very old fan from the attic. I plugged it in, and as soon as I turned it on, tiny spiders were blown all over my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 880 You deserved it 18 478

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