By whytho - 19/11/2019 03:00 Because of him Today, I broke up with my boyfriend, I also found out I have an STD. I was clean before we dated ... FML I agree, your life sucks 392 You deserved it 45 6 0 25 1 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/11/2019 01:00 It is not mine Today, my girlfriend announced to me that she is pregnant and tried to tell me it was mine. I lost both testicles to an infection as a teenager so, no way it’s mine. Somehow, she never made the mental connection that no balls equals no children and no way to convince me I’m the dad, dumb cheating girl. FML I agree, your life sucks 618 You deserved it 25 9 2 17 39 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By "naomi3271" - 18/11/2019 20:00 Loud fart Today, I was accidentally scared my one year old son with my huge smelly fart that was so loud. He now won't come around me without crying... FML I agree, your life sucks 506 You deserved it 190 4 3 4 82 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 18/11/2019 20:00 Hopeless Today, my wife of 2 years told me she was pregnant, after we've been trying for ages. Excited, about to call my parents, then, my wife told me, "Don't get your hopes up it might not be yours, the father could be 5 other guys." And then asked me what I'd like for dinner. FML I agree, your life sucks 1630 You deserved it 94 49 2 191 14 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By princess98 - 18/11/2019 05:00 Revenge! Today, I had to ask my boyfriend to take a shower because he smelt awful and wanted to cuddle. After 45 minutes, he did. I wanted to cuddle and fool around after he was done. I got rejected because he did not want to get dirty. FML I agree, your life sucks 1007 You deserved it 381 6 1 11 115 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 18/11/2019 03:00 Bad friends Today, I was hanging with my friends when out of the blue, I got thirsty. Friends said there was Gatorade in the fridge. Being the trusting person I am, I took a drink, only to discover it was piss. FML I agree, your life sucks 1271 You deserved it 155 5 3 116 28 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sigh - 18/11/2019 01:00 - Singapore - Singapore Lovely parents Today, my parents forgot it was my birthday. They ordered me to scrub the common bathroom, and when I asked if they remembered, my dad's reaction was "Oh! Really?" My mom's was "I thought that it was next week." What lovely parents I have. FML I agree, your life sucks 1152 You deserved it 99 67 4 18 5 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 17/11/2019 18:00 I will always be in her thought Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after being "pressured" into a relationship with another guy. But it's okay, she said she would think of me every time she made love to him. FML I agree, your life sucks 1700 You deserved it 110 56 10 89 22 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Cnscott0205 - 17/11/2019 14:00 - United States - Denver Big one Today, I accidentally touched someone's boobs. It was a man. And I noticed that they were bigger than mine. FML I agree, your life sucks 1027 You deserved it 158 12 7 2 105 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By payge9182 - 17/11/2019 05:00 - United States - Mesa Really stinks Today, while at work I started having stomach problems. I ran to the bathroom just in time for my intestines to completely void themselves. After a few moments, I hear a little girl take a sniff and said, "wow she smells worse than Daddy!". FML I agree, your life sucks 1226 You deserved it 128 5 4 10 145 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - 17/11/2019 03:00 - United States - Jesup He thought that I am a lesbian Today, like every other day, my husband wears women's leotards and ballet tights, wanting me to find it attractive. But I found it disgusting. FML I agree, your life sucks 1233 You deserved it 242 78 5 25 27 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 17/11/2019 01:00 - United States - Chicago So, it is not immoral ? Today, my parents were arguing about their relationship. My mom, who is very Christian, yells at my dad for watching porn. My dad responds, "Of course I watch porn, I've told you! I have shown you!" He is also the one who stressed to me at a very young age that porn is immoral. FML I agree, your life sucks 1157 You deserved it 93 40 4 9 32 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Hide -n- Seek - 16/11/2019 20:00 - United States - Grand Prairie Hide and Seek Today, someone left a note on the front door saying "Let's play Hide and Seek". Who ever left the note apparently took my tires off my truck and scattered them. So far, I found one in my pool, and 2 outside my neighborhood. I still can't find the last one. FML I agree, your life sucks 1544 You deserved it 90 14 7 91 60 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 16/11/2019 18:00 My anal beads Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML I agree, your life sucks 540 You deserved it 1120 5 4 16 143 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By moaner - 16/11/2019 05:00 - Argentina - San Rafael Both of us Today, I heard my handsome neighbor masturbating, and he definitely heard me when I reached my climax. Then, he called me and ask if I am watching porn. FML I agree, your life sucks 1050 You deserved it 594 19 9 8 149 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Meg - 16/11/2019 03:00 It is not fair Today, I came home from college for the summer. And for the first time in 6 months I will have the opportunity to have sex with my boyfriend every day. One week before I came home, my doctor put me on new medication with the side effects forbidden me for not having orgasms. FML I agree, your life sucks 1166 You deserved it 183 61 4 20 14 31 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Momming hard - 16/11/2019 01:00 He chooses his dad Today, my 3 year old ran to give me a hug, so I thought cause, instead of hugging me, he ran past me to his dad... I stood their arms open like a dang fool. FML I agree, your life sucks 940 You deserved it 188 15 5 7 59 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sleep deprived - 15/11/2019 20:00 Three years Today, it has been three years since my sister gave me a kitten. Coincidentally, it’s also been three years since I did not have sex. FML I agree, your life sucks 1108 You deserved it 238 20 4 8 73 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 15/11/2019 18:00 Testimony night Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML I agree, your life sucks 1804 You deserved it 318 10 8 77 158 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By horribleawfulnogoodverybadweek - 15/11/2019 05:00 Artificial tooth Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over text because she discovered from my mum that my teeth are no longer my permanent teeth. And she feels disgusted by kissing me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1590 You deserved it 123 91 4 46 10 11 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wet and sad - 15/11/2019 03:00 Completely soaking Today, I was walking to work when it was starting to pour down sideways. I was pretty early anyway, so, I decided to duck into a bus shelter and let it pass. Suddenly, a big truck comes and drenched me with the biggest puddle. Soaking from head to toe. FML I agree, your life sucks 1481 You deserved it 111 59 6 25 19 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By "onefmlafteranother" - 15/11/2019 01:00 Vicious dog Today, I was laying my head on my dad's dog when he walked in. I jokingly asked my dad "I'm cuddling with your dog, are you jealous?" At that moment, the dog lets a massive, earth-quaking fart and my dad promptly responded "Nope!" FML. I agree, your life sucks 1187 You deserved it 405 2 3 5 180 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By IGotFinessed - 14/11/2019 14:00 - United States - New Fairfield Fortunately, she is gone Today, I just realized that my ex-girlfriend has been using my credit card to buy condoms, beer, and dildos just to piss me off. FML I agree, your life sucks 1413 You deserved it 437 15 6 26 96 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 14/11/2019 18:00 She is looking for the best Today, I found out my fiancé cheated. While having sex... She sent him videos in which I am eating her out, and then she asked him if he can do better than me. FML I agree, your life sucks 2045 You deserved it 191 49 7 177 26 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 14/11/2019 21:00 - Hong Kong Wedding anniversary Today, my husband and I decided to have sex after our 2nd year anniversary dinner. When we started taking each other's clothes off, my husband suddenly said that he forgot to turn the water tap off, then he went away and didn't come back, I literally waited for 2 hours! FML I agree, your life sucks 1638 You deserved it 160 33 3 91 32 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 14/11/2019 05:00 Excitation morning Today, when I was in bed, my cat licked my nipple. It turned me on. FML I agree, your life sucks 1305 You deserved it 445 28 5 49 162 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 14/11/2019 03:00 She missed everything Today, my girlfriend fell asleep 3 min into the 25 min TV show sex that we waited all week to watch together. FML. I agree, your life sucks 1168 You deserved it 184 28 2 5 59 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 14/11/2019 01:00 Everyone knows my secret. Today, I was hanging out with my little sister (11 years old) and she turns to look at me, out of the blue and flat out, and asks me "what kind of porn do you watch?" So, then I told her I watch girlxgirl. Now, my whole Catholic family knows I'm bisexual. FML I agree, your life sucks 614 You deserved it 2257 23 6 32 113 24 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 13/11/2019 20:00 My stupidity Today, I got my period and went clubbing. I had to change my tampon and stupidly I only brought one, when I unwrapped it, it fell on the floor, I had to wait in the girl's bathroom for 45 minutes for a random girl to give me a spare. FML. I agree, your life sucks 1386 You deserved it 623 40 6 32 56 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By PNeil - 13/11/2019 14:00 Time wasting Today, after having spent all of last night studying for an algebra test, I find out that the test was on a completely different chapter of my textbook. FML I agree, your life sucks 884 You deserved it 1223 15 4 39 58 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today I found out my brother-in-law and my sister are engaged...she asked him now my sister will also be my sister in law FML I agree, your life sucks 24 You deserved it 5 0 Comments
Today, I realized that my wife is on her 3rd month using an IUD. The side effect is nonstop bleeding. I haven't had sex with her since she got it. I'd... I agree, your life sucks 9 You deserved it 1 0 Comments
Today, my wife of 2 years told me she was pregnant, after we've been trying for ages. Excited, about to call my parents, then, my wife told me, "Don't... I agree, your life sucks 1630 You deserved it 94 17 Comments
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after being "pressured" into a relationship with another guy. But it's okay, she said she would think of me every... I agree, your life sucks 1700 You deserved it 110 7 Comments
Funniest FMLs of the Day
Weirdest FMLs of the Day