brokenDanceDebut · 10 November 2026, 15:00 ·Berlin, Germany

Experimental dance moves

Today, I wanted to kickstart my career as a dance teacher as part of a dance festival. I had my own performance and a kids group. I froze on stage and stopped dancing halfway. They had the wrong music and the kids stopped halfway. Overall, zero sign-ups so far. One rival literally smirked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 You deserved it 19

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Anonymous · 10 November 2026, 12:00 ·Dar es Salaam, Tanzania

Dunno where that hand has been

Today, at a funeral family gathering, I greeted an elderly relative and kissed her palm (it's a family thing). She then took my palm and brought it near her lips, then dropped it and went on her way. I didn't even wanna do that in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 You deserved it 8

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Anonymous · 10 November 2026, 09:00 ·West Valley City, United States

Humblebrag much?

Today, I realized that I went from being extremely fit, disciplined, and well-groomed to a shell of myself due to my girlfriend's lack of sex drive. I used to have 10/10s hitting me up for threesomes and have women breaking up with their men for a chance with me. Now I'm stuck with someone who doesn't care about sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 You deserved it 149

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mr_flarpin · This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff ·Stoneham, United States

Baffled and confused

Today, I got stumped by a childproof door. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 334 You deserved it 7 592

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Anonymous · 10 November 2026, 03:00 ·London, Canada

Gatekeeping

Today, I met this girl and we hit it off. We got talking about growing up. She let me know she had ADHD growing up and it was very hard growing up with it, and she got help. I validated her. I let told her I recently got diagnosed with ADHD and she told me that I’m 29 and should've it figured out. She was very dismissive about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132 You deserved it 27

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Anonymous · 10 November 2026, 00:00 ·Brisbane, Australia

Get a job!

Today, as always, my fiance claims to be a "picky eater." This consists of McDonald's, pizza or Taco Bell. Unfortunately, I have had to do groceries instead due to current funding, and have been advised that they will no longer be eating as they can't stomach anything else. They also refuse to get a job to help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155 You deserved it 72

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Anonymous · 9 November 2026, 22:00 ·United Kingdom

TRAITORS!

Today, my parents love my girlfriend so much more than me that they actually convinced her that she deserves someone better than me. Then when she broke up with me, they started introducing her to better guys, including my cousin, guys from church, and one of my mum's employees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229 You deserved it 29

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Dion98 · 9 November 2026, 20:00 ·Brisbane, Australia

What gives?

Today, my fiancee gave me back her engagement ring because I refused to drive her to get cigarettes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 190 You deserved it 43

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Selina · This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff ·Trenton, United States

NOT NOW!

Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 998 You deserved it 5 356

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Joh · 9 November 2026, 15:00 ·Singapore, Singapore

Same, tbh

Today, I realized that there are two types of days in my life. Days when I work, and days where I lie on the couch doomscrolling and waiting for it to be late enough to start drinking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 You deserved it 162

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Gerry · 9 November 2026, 09:00 ·United States

Checking out

Today, I was suspended from work. Last week, while working at the hospital, they brought in a patient who was involved in an accident. He was pronounced DOA (Dead On Arrival). He was a longtime friend of mine, so I posted my grief on Facebook and Instagram. That’s how his mom and sister found out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 You deserved it 594

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SchoolSucks · This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff ·United States

Get me away from her(e)

Today, it's my first day at a new school. I transferred here halfway through the year to get away from a girl who bullies me. She's apparently bullied her mom into transferring her here as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 683 You deserved it 3 242

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Anonymous · 9 November 2026, 03:00 ·San Bernardino, United States

Judge Judy

Today, we had a family gathering but the whole time my spoiled brat of a sister made a big deal about her “coming out” as polyamorous. She kept going on and on about imaginary struggles and oppression, while simultaneously bragging about all the people (if you can call them that) she’s banging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236 You deserved it 81

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Anonymous · 9 November 2026, 00:00 ·Rolde, The Netherlands

I'm so tired

Today, after a very long day, I got home from the swimming pool at 10:30 pm. I didn’t have dinner, I was super hungry, so I ordered a pizza while walking back home. 35 minutes later, only a can of coke arrived. Apparently, I that's all I actually ordered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 164 You deserved it 123

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Karencut · 8 November 2026, 20:00 ·Toronto, Canada

Hair today, gone tomorrow

Today, I got a professional haircut for the first time in 2 years. I wanted it touching the tops of my shoulders and thats what length the stylist cut it to. After she washed my hair she decided to 'touch it up' and cut way too much off. I now have a Karen cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 239 You deserved it 37

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desigirl · This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff ·Johnson City, United States

Worst argument ever

Today, my boyfriend told me I should stop talking about his major gambling problem because he still loves me even though I gained weight. Apparently that evens things out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 522 You deserved it 3 512

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Anonymous · 8 November 2026, 15:00 ·Atlanta, United States

You would scream too

Today, I got home from work and discovered that my dog dug up my bunny who died a couple of weeks ago. The scream I screamed made the new neighbor think I'm crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 215 You deserved it 72

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Anonymous · 8 November 2026, 09:00 ·San Bernardino, United States

Always be prepared

Today, my boyfriend’s ex is such a vindictive controlling bitch. It was our first time picking up the kids but she refused to give them to us because we didn’t have car seats. Instead of just letting us use hers, she demanded we go buy brand new seats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 You deserved it 794

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juliannamelissa · This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff ·Philadelphia, United States

Relaxing

Today, I wanted to take a bubble bath with the jets in the bath that I haven't used in years. When I got in, it took me a while to realize that the jets had squirted out slime and a family of unidentifiable bugs that have probably been living there for years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 509 You deserved it 9 754

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fiat850 · 8 November 2026, 03:00 ·Chino, United States

Food for thought

Today, we held a funeral for a friend who'd died of food poisoning that he contracted at the funeral for another friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327 You deserved it 36

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Anonymous · 8 November 2026, 00:00 ·United Kingdom

Life's a bitch

Today, a tiny puppy only a few weeks old came out of some bushes and chose me as her human. I took her home and left her with my wife while I went back out for flea shampoo, milk, and a bed. When I got home, my wife had already called a charity to pick her up, because, “We’re not dog people.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 317 You deserved it 92

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Hormonal · 7 November 2026, 22:00 ·Berlin, Germany

Armchair shrinks requested in the comments!

Today, I'm unmotivated, lazy slob who keeps screwing up at work. For half the month. The other half, I'm a hyperactive, super fast worker, who finishes everything, and greedily picks up more tasks. Between the Jekyll and Hyde, my coworkers no longer trust me. Why am I like this? FML

I agree, your life sucks 198 You deserved it 113

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Ashy.Kinz · 7 November 2026, 20:00 ·Garland, United States

From beyond the grave

Today, I found out that multiple people have access to my dead friend’s FB account and have seen every single thing I’ve tagged his account on, sent to his Messenger, etc., Which is mostly spicy novel accounts that do giveaways (where you tag a friend to enter). Thanksgiving might be interesting… FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 You deserved it 269

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althornton2462 · This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff ·Hudson, United States

News to him

Today, I messaged the guy I've been seeing for four months, referring to him as my boyfriend. His response? "I didn't realize you had a boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 706 You deserved it 4 328

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Optic Blast · 7 November 2026, 15:00 ·Makati City, Philippines

Eye to eye

Today, my idiot friends set me up on a blind date. It was about to go well, until her glass eye fell out onto my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 185 You deserved it 99

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Anonymous · 7 November 2026, 12:00 ·United Kingdom

Wrong way down a one-way street

Today, my wife is mad at me because I didn’t let our son win at Mario Kart Racing and he cried. I’m sorry, but it’s almost impossible to let a kid win at Mario Kart when he drives his character off every cliff, runs into every obstacle, and pulls 180s to drive down the track in the wrong direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294 You deserved it 40

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Anonymous · 7 November 2026, 09:00 ·United Kingdom

Piss off

Today, my dad, who only recently came back into my life, decided somewhere in his booze-damaged brain, that I still needed parenting like a teenager. He tried to take my car keys for staying out late, tried to ground me for drinking, and disapproves of me dating. I’m 27 and own my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315 You deserved it 36

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Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff ·United States

Carefully does it…

Today, I was pulling into a parking garage space and using the next car over to judge where the wall was in front of me, but ended up whumping my front bumper as I pulled forward. Wondering what had happened, I got out to see that the car I was aligning myself against had hit the wall too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 463 You deserved it 27 197

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Anonymous · 7 November 2026, 03:00 ·United States

The status quo suits me fine

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after ten months. Why? She found out I didn't vote. Apparently that means I don't care about "her rights" and that's "a dealbreaker." Crazy bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102 You deserved it 707

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Anonymous · 7 November 2026, 00:00 ·United States

The slow wheels of justice

Today, I had court at 8 am. After 4 hours of sitting through other's hearings, they finally told me that there wasn't any time for me. I've already had to go out of my way to request time off from work and get witnesses together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 312 You deserved it 42

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