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Saturday 4 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML

#20636616
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41895) - you deserved it (6474)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finally got a phone call from a publisher saying they would publish the book I'd written. I'd gotten loads of rejection letters, so I was so excited. Until I realized it was my dad, feeling sorry for me. FML

#20646182
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42888) - you deserved it (3323)

On 05/06/2013 at 7:43pm - work - by sobasics - United States

Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I was cleaning dishes in the back. I started to sing to myself. During the chorus I heard the echo of my voice in my ear. My boss had pushed the talk button on my headset so every staff member and everyone in the lobby could hear me over the intercom. FML

#20653580
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44460) - you deserved it (8925)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:44am - work - by legit247 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had a big party planned. All but one of the guests cancelled. See you at 7, mom. FML

#20630222
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46406) - you deserved it (3654)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands

Today, I was rushed to the ER due to a very swollen foot and high fever. The doctors said I just have a tissue infection but my parents believe I have a flesh eating disease. I can hear them discussing my future with an amputated leg. FML

#20652691
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45012) - you deserved it (2485)

On 05/09/2013 at 7:18pm - health - by iLikeMyLegs - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to end things with my boyfriend, thinking it would be fine since things have never been at all serious between us. He cried for hours before having his grandmother text me to say how heartless I am. FML

#20654207
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44633) - you deserved it (8209)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

#20649324
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42579) - you deserved it (5281)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:42am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I spent hours playing my guitar and singing in the street, hoping to make some extra cash. About 3 hours in, I realized some punk had been walking around with a hat taking money as if he was with me. FML

#20633517
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46436) - you deserved it (5246)

On 04/30/2013 at 8:31pm - money - by honeynuggetviolin -

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68118) - you deserved it (6292)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, my brother's friend was about to drive home drunk, so I convinced him to think and not be stupid. It wasn't an invitation to puke on my floor then try to crawl into bed with me. FML

#20655778
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43580) - you deserved it (5504)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:52am - misc - by GaveAnInchTakeAMile (woman) - United States

Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML

#20643761
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22227) - you deserved it (42276)

On 05/05/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by LilaTheGreat - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mom accused me of being pregnant. She wouldn't believe me when I told her I'm a virgin, and she challenged me to take a pregnancy test. It came back with a false positive. FML

#20634792
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61057) - you deserved it (4438)

On 05/01/2013 at 1:23pm - health - by DemiRawrs - United States

Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML

#20640271
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24568) - you deserved it (31788)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:17am - work - by charishard - United States (Texas)



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