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By Imnotfromhere - 27/2/2021 05:01

Problematic language

Today, at my new retail job, I accidentally referred to white tank tops as, "Wife beaters." That's what I thought they were actually called, until my boss had to correct me. FML
I agree, your life sucks
80
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38
2 Comments
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By Anonymous - 27/2/2021 00:30 - Germany - Wolfsburg

Hello Alanis ? We've got something for you.

Today, two people at work - both higher up than me - called me out for "stomping" when I walk up stairs. I have a disability that causes this. We work at a place specifically for disabled people. FML
I agree, your life sucks
280
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15
5 Comments
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By Anonymous - 26/2/2021 05:01 - United States - Pittsburgh

Big booming voice issues

Today, like the rest of the past year, I had to hear my roommate as he works as tech support from home. The man does not have an "inside voice" but echoes across multiple floors like a tuba, as he debugs people's software issues over the phone. Talking to him about it only makes him angry… and louder. FML
I agree, your life sucks
383
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32
3 Comments
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By Anonymous - 25/2/2021 17:01

Well done!

Today, I got congratulations at work for being "so focused" and "not spending time on my phone." I didn't have the heart to tell my manager I don't spend time on my phone because I have no friends to talk to. FML
I agree, your life sucks
558
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81
5 Comments
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By Anonymous - 24/2/2021 13:59

So young, so jaded

Today, like every day, I scrolled through my social media feeds, seeing happy couples, people buying houses and landing their dream jobs. I, on the other hand, am a single 23 year-old man in a dead end job that still lives with his parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks
453
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458
16 Comments
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By Anonymous - 22/2/2021 02:01

Working from home rules!

Today, my husband said a cheery, "Hi!" to me after 4 hours of nonstop Zoom calls. I spun around happily and greeted him back. Turns out he just joined another Zoom call. FML
I agree, your life sucks
716
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94
2 Comments
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By Tabby Rosas - 21/2/2021 21:30

Slid right out

Today, after 8 days of being on a medication that makes it hard to go to the bathroom and no luck taking laxatives and drinking coffee and apple juice, I finally got to go. Too bad I was at my desk at work when it happened. I washed out my pants in the bathroom and got to sit in wet pants for 4 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks
845
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56
4 Comments
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By Anonymous - 20/2/2021 16:59

Overcome

Today, I just finished a client meeting. I couldn’t stop stuttering and couldn’t answer their questions. Towards the end, they just ignored me. I’ve been in the job for a year. I’m pretty much in tears now. FML
I agree, your life sucks
741
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169
4 Comments
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By Fuckthispandemic - 19/2/2021 08:01 - United States - Annapolis

A complaint of Karens

Today, while working as a manager in a busy restaurant, I was hit in the face by a grandmother with a balloon, calling me a motherfucker, while her granddaughter chucked a salad plate into the kitchen. Why? I told them they had to leave at 10, which is currently pandemic law in my state. FML
I agree, your life sucks
914
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51
4 Comments
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By Anonymous - 19/2/2021 15:01 - Australia - The Oaks

Sorry, but it's a no

Today, after years of battling mental health and unemployment, I was rejected from a job packing tomatoes. Apparently I'm unsuitable for even the most basic work. FML
I agree, your life sucks
826
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64
5 Comments
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By Anonymous - 18/2/2021 02:59 - United States - West Yellowstone

Alexa, play "Burning down the house" by Talking Heads

Today, a house I'm working in burned down overnight. My entire cordless tool line up and everything else needed to remodel a 3-story home is gone. Almost $14000. The only way I will be somewhat, maybe, possibly, reimbursed is if I stay on to rebuild the home. I don't have anything left to even start. FML
I agree, your life sucks
1063
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92
5 Comments
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By Anonymous - 18/2/2021 02:01

The mainframe had been haxored

Today, I found out my email hasn't been working for 10 days. Normally, this wouldn't be a big deal, but it just so happens that a position opened up for my dream job while this was happening. I would have gotten the job, but instead they gave it to someone I just finished training. FML
I agree, your life sucks
714
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84
5 Comments
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By hannah - 18/2/2021 00:30

Shot from both sides

Today, I was yelled at by multiple people at work for not wearing any makeup. The only reason I don’t wear makeup is because my mom is guaranteed to make me cry before I leave the house every morning, so there’s no point. FML
I agree, your life sucks
1004
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77
7 Comments
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By Anonymous - 17/2/2021 08:01

Karen strikes again

Today, at work as a manager at pizza place, I got yelled by a customer because they got one fewer paper plates than they asked for. FML
I agree, your life sucks
655
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87
2 Comments
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By Amaaaaaaaaaanda - 17/2/2021 00:30

The Based Family

Today, my temporarily unemployed husband had a brain wave. I'm five months pregnant and we have a 4-year-old. He thinks we should start a family vlog on YouTube, so we can get rich. I hate those awful family vlogs with a passion. FML
I agree, your life sucks
736
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82
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By Anonymous - 16/2/2021 14:01

Ghosts!

Today, I was written up for bringing my son to work. For safety reasons, bringing kids to work is strictly prohibited. I don’t have any kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks
1094
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65
7 Comments
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By Anonymous - 16/2/2021 01:58 - Australia

Teamwork works

Today, I had a huge amount of work to get through. Two colleagues offered to help, because one had nothing else to do, and the other couldn't work until I was done. My boss got really pissed at me for "making" them do my job and wasting their time. FML
I agree, your life sucks
829
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64
2 Comments
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By Anonymous - 14/2/2021 17:01

Daydream believer

Today, I apparently fell asleep during a work Zoom meeting. I awoke to no meeting on my screen and an e-mail from my boss saying I was terminated, and to do something about my "sleep apnea." FML
I agree, your life sucks
774
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816
4 Comments
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By Anonymous - 14/2/2021 07:58

Seize the means

Today, I found out I make less money than the temps at my job by over 2 dollars an hour. I've been working there the longest and do 75% of the job myself. I was told, "We'll think about it" when talking to upper management about getting equal pay or close to. FML
I agree, your life sucks
973
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78
7 Comments
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By Ann - 13/2/2021 21:28

We're so happy for you, sorta!

Today, my boyfriend, who is also a coworker, proposed to me in the parking of the store we work at when it was dark out. He came up behind me, and, thinking it was some creep, I stabbed him with my car keys. The scar will alway help him remember our engagement. FML
I agree, your life sucks
863
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125
4 Comments
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By ZG1 - 13/2/2021 20:00

Thanks for coming in, Mr Belch

Today, I burped and sneezed during a job interview, I don’t think they were impressed by my talents. FML
I agree, your life sucks
614
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203
3 Comments
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By DamnGurl - 12/2/2021 02:58 - United States - Kula

Too clever

Today, during a programming interview, I provided the right approach and the right answer as agreed by the interviewer, but used some extra variables with proper names. Guess who is not selected for the next round due to those extra variables. FML
I agree, your life sucks
717
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130
2 Comments
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By lukey101 - 11/2/2021 14:01 - Australia

Most likely

Today, I had my half-year performance review. My boss arrived 15 minutes late, paid basically no attention to my presentation, and left 30 minutes early. I guess I’ll go fuck myself then. FML
I agree, your life sucks
813
You deserved it
65
3 Comments
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By Kayladuh - 9/2/2021 21:30

The bitch is back

Today, I overheard a co-worker tell the new guy not to talk to me because I'm a bitch. Apparently, she didn't like it when I told her two weeks ago that she had a drinking problem, which was affecting her work ethic. FML
I agree, your life sucks
776
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203
7 Comments
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By Anonymous - 9/2/2021 17:01

It never rains…

Today, it's my ninth day off work. I should have been back 4 days ago, but whilst resting a swollen knee at home, I got a hair stuck in my eye so badly that I had to go to A&E at 4 a.m. to get it taken out. Now work won't let me come back until the resulting conjunctivitis clears up. FML
I agree, your life sucks
713
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97
2 Comments
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By Faith - 9/2/2021 11:01

Idiocracy

Today, I got my vacation days denied because I'm "too valuable", while the moron I work with gets his days off because he's "easy to do without." Well, I guess I won't be spending much time with my girlfriend who flew across the country to see me. Glad I'm such a valuable employee. FML
I agree, your life sucks
1192
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97
8 Comments
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By Anonymous - 8/2/2021 19:01 - Iraq - Baghdad

Being multilingual sucks sometimes

Today, in our microbiology lab, there's a machine called bacteria incubator, which translates to Arabic as "bacteria hugger." I envied the bacteria because it gets hugs. FML
I agree, your life sucks
592
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185
2 Comments
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By IrialNiall - 8/2/2021 07:42

On the down-low

Today, I tried to quit my job of almost 6 years so I can date the man of my dreams, one of my bosses. When I gave my 3 weeks notice so they can try to replace me, they refused to accept it. My potential boyfriend won't see me anymore until I quit and can't tell my other managers why I need to quit. FML
I agree, your life sucks
737
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1119
15 Comments
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IrialNiall tells us more :
I have another job lined up, no problem, and am already hired in. It made more sense for me to be the one to leave since I'm hourly and he's salary. I love my job, but I hate it at the same time, so it's a bit of both. He never asked me to leave though, I offered to be the one to go somewhere else. He's never struck me as controlling or anything like that before, and still doesn't now. But neither...
By Anonymous - 8/2/2021 02:01

Receptacle

Today, I felt sick at work and tried to run to the bathroom with my hand covering my mouth, but saw a garbage can and removed my hand to let it loose. I forgot to remove my mask. FML
I agree, your life sucks
810
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166
0 Comments
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By Anonymous - 7/2/2021 21:30

Unexpected visitor

Today I went to a much-anticipated job interview. I've been out of work for a month and I really need and wanted this job. I then realized that yesterday's hike was not a good idea when a tick crawled across my forehead in the middle of the interview. FML
I agree, your life sucks
799
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141
5 Comments
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Nearly  
Today,I was forced by my family to take my grandma to the emergency room because she’s had shingles and has been sleeping lots, only to wait 4 hours to...
I agree, your life sucks
14
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1
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Today, I went in to get a shot for a migraine to find out I'm 17 weeks pregnant... I am almost 40 and my tubes are tied. FML
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60
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6
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  Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML
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95
3 Comments
  Today, I woke up with a sore clitoris. I haven't had sex with my boyfriend for weeks, but I did masturbate yesterday. I guess I can't get horny without...
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