By - 24/2/2020 02:00 Incomprehensible Today, I arrived in Tokyo and went to stay overnight in a teeny airport cabin hotel with shared bathroom facilities. I used the little wicker baskets to put my clothes on and when I came out of the shower, I found someone had stolen my favorite top. Who steals dirty clothes?! FML I agree, your life sucks 2560 You deserved it 283 115 6 43 57 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 18:00 Bad hole Today, my boyfriend wanted to have anal sex and I was not informed. While we were doing doggystyle, I felt him pulling out and putting it in my ass. I told him to stop because I was not prepared for anal. He didn't listen and put it in anyway. After a few thrusts some poop got on his penis. FML I agree, your life sucks 2334 You deserved it 231 107 6 62 237 32 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 23/2/2020 20:00 That's a mother Today, my mom and I got into a fight about a topic we agreed on. Seems like we're destined to never get along. FML I agree, your life sucks 2190 You deserved it 262 75 11 11 121 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 04:00 Good life above all Today, my boyfriend couldn’t be bothered raising our baby daughter, so he ran off with a rich whore with 3 sons of her own he could be bothered raising since the new perks of parenthood included a Mercedes, a yacht, 4 foreign holidays a year and a comfortable retirement at 45 years old. FML I agree, your life sucks 1716 You deserved it 228 135 4 48 18 29 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 22/2/2020 18:00 My dear neighbor Today, I had a very sweet and romantic love note brutally scratched into the door of my brand new car. It was addressed to Cindy. Cindy lives next door. FML I agree, your life sucks 1615 You deserved it 82 9 3 116 26 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
BLOG FML's 10 Favorite Halloween Stories! 0 By Alan / Thursday 31 October 2019 18:00 It's Halloween today! As you would expect, we've received some Halloween-related FMLs over the years, so here's our pick to celebrate.
BLOG FML's Weekly Horoscope - 27th of October 2019 0 By Mystic Alan / Sunday 27 October 2019 18:00 Find out what embarrassing stuff the dumbass stars and planets have in store for you this week!
By - 23/2/2020 01:00 Very good remedy Today, after suffering with anxiety and insomnia for a nearly a year and exhausting every natural remedy, I could think of, I finally decided to go to a Dr. for help. Instead of writing me a prescription, he told me to drink more teas and think happy thoughts. I had to pay out of pocket for this. FML I agree, your life sucks 1587 You deserved it 157 91 2 39 32 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 18:00 I miss him Today, after a 6 month dry spell, my husband was yet again “too tired” to have sex. I guess I finally found something I miss about my ex. FML I agree, your life sucks 1573 You deserved it 270 107 4 8 36 27 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 27/2/2020 01:00 Stupid boyfriend Today, I came home from work and I find that my boyfriend gave my dog away. FML I agree, your life sucks 1566 You deserved it 98 37 5 190 14 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 22/2/2020 01:00 Ready or not? Today, the girl I love told me that she wanted to marry me. She then went on a date with another person who invited her to eat in a fancy restaurant. The next day she told me that she was not yet ready to marry. FML I agree, your life sucks 1494 You deserved it 151 87 8 19 33 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 22/2/2020 20:00 Too dry Today, I spent the evening with my new wife at the doctor’s because she thought she had a UTI. The doctor sent the nurse to talk to us because he was too embarrassed to tell us that we just needed to use more lube. FML I agree, your life sucks 1433 You deserved it 280 12 6 6 218 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 22/2/2020 14:00 Good old days Today, I drove my first grade son to a friend's house for a play date. Turns out, his friends mom was my ex who cheated on my sophomore year in high school. FML I agree, your life sucks 1416 You deserved it 167 14 3 42 91 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 22/2/2020 05:00 I took a rake Today, I found out the guy I’ve been talking to for almost 6 months just had a baby with his wife (they’re not legally divorced yet). He told me that we were just a fling. FML I agree, your life sucks 1266 You deserved it 350 64 2 41 23 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 05:00 What a pity Today, I met my old love I haven't seen in 30 years. We are both married with kids. After talking 5 minutes with her, I fell in love again. It isn't mutual. FML I agree, your life sucks 1263 You deserved it 2971 164 5 47 51 30 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 20:00 Who loves well chasten as well Today, my girlfriend asked how I was feeling because I’ve been feeling down and experiencing a lot of anxiety lately. I said was feeling a lot better and, I finally think I’m on my way to get well. She did not agree and started a fight over it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1248 You deserved it 107 71 4 26 19 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 23/2/2020 05:00 Great disappointment Today, I found out thru a friend that my crush actually thinks that I am creepy and disgusting, when all this time I was nice to her, paid attention to her whenever I'd see her and talk to her, shared my snacks with her, and such. I feel like dumb, ha-ha fuck love. FML I agree, your life sucks 1212 You deserved it 559 104 6 16 19 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 21/2/2020 14:00 No chance Today, my girlfriend of two years called me over late at night. I got excited, assuming she finally wanted sex. No, she just wanted me to make her mac and cheese and talk to her because she was ‘restless’. FML. I agree, your life sucks 1207 You deserved it 725 34 7 5 112 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 01:00 Again Today, I left my bedroom door open and when I came back to my room, I see that my friend's cat has shit on my bed again. FML I agree, your life sucks 1198 You deserved it 315 15 3 24 64 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 14:00 It's wrong Today, I found out the phrase "painless dentistry" is a dirty lie. FML I agree, your life sucks 1178 You deserved it 146 9 3 18 85 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 14:00 Knock out Today, I treat myself to a Thai massage. The masseuse is so aggressive, she left me with injuries on my hands and back. I paid $60 for someone to hurt me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1149 You deserved it 225 19 4 40 60 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 14:00 Her brother Today, I told my best friend that I love her. After so long, I realized tiny relation weren't going to get her to notice, so I decided to just start acting like we were already a couple. She didn't get mad, so that further reinforced my idea that she liked me. Turns out, she loves me like a brother. FML I agree, your life sucks 1106 You deserved it 663 27 6 46 44 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 24/2/2020 01:00 Well done Today, my ex girlfriend's dad and her brothers attacked me because I hit her, even though she hit me first and there multiple witnesses when she did it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1075 You deserved it 2079 89 6 48 28 50 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 25/2/2020 22:00 Her revenge Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML I agree, your life sucks 1023 You deserved it 452 28 6 19 67 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 27/2/2020 06:00 I do not understand Today, the girl I realized I really liked told me she liked me back but didn’t want a relationship. A week later she hooks up with a random bartender and now she’s talking to me about changing her mind about something serious with him. FML I agree, your life sucks 991 You deserved it 120 64 4 6 12 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 26/2/2020 20:00 No thanks Today, I ask the guy that I like if he want to go to lunch tomorrow at a local restaurant. He answer that he doesn't like their food. I think that's is a no. FML I agree, your life sucks 912 You deserved it 187 69 3 6 11 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 21/2/2020 18:00 Woe is me! Today, Had sex with some random girl off Tinder to make my ex jealous. I received gonorrhea from her and she's pregnant and not going to abort. This random girl is the 2nd girl I have ever slept with in my life. FML I agree, your life sucks 885 You deserved it 4696 42 5 64 205 30 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 28/2/2020 01:00 Not a girl, not yet a woman Today, I got a very accusing phone call from my daughters teacher. According to my daughter, I absolutely refuse to let her eat in the morning. In reality, I told her it’s her responsibility to get herself up and get breakfast on her own before we leave. My daughter is 17yrs old. FML I agree, your life sucks 816 You deserved it 58 11 3 21 43 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 23/2/2020 14:00 The disturbator Today, when I went to work, I had a head room because I haven't slept in two days. My colleagues thought that I was on something and probably think, I'm a cracked, while, I chase the neighbor's cat every night because my veranda has become her litter box. FML I agree, your life sucks 781 You deserved it 291 53 3 15 17 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 27/2/2020 14:00 We did fail Today, on our way to home from work, I farted so bad in the car that my husband gagged and almost threw up swerving the car we almost had a car accident. FML I agree, your life sucks 744 You deserved it 359 7 2 8 118 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 26/2/2020 14:00 My fucking life Today, my life is like a mess even though I think, I did nothing wrong, but I don't know what happened or what I did, but I feel like every day is a day where I continuously keep getting karma. Does anyone feel the same or am I just alone in the dark waiting for someone to save me like my savior? FML I agree, your life sucks 656 You deserved it 427 89 5 4 15 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By - 27/2/2020 18:00 Not really a good idea Today, I decide to let my boyfriend introduce food into our sex life, then a few days after we used melted chocolate I got a UTI. I’ve never had a UTI before in my life so I’m blaming him for the fact it feels like I’m peeing needles dipped in acid. FML I agree, your life sucks 417 You deserved it 803 16 1 6 42 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
I was at the financial aid officethe other day... I looked over and saw someone, who looked exactly like my ex-wife did the last time I was with her, and... I agree, your life sucks 34 You deserved it 7 0 Comments
Today someone broke into my locker and blamed something on me, I got called to the principal's office and I was in trouble for "having drugs on school... I agree, your life sucks 42 You deserved it 4 0 Comments
Today, I decide to let my boyfriend introduce food into our sex life, then a few days after we used melted chocolate I got a UTI. I’ve never had a UTI... I agree, your life sucks 417 You deserved it 803 5 Comments
Today, I decide that when I will have a free weekend I will study, but instead of that my girlfriend wants to fuck with me every chance she gets. So I... I agree, your life sucks 416 You deserved it 1062 15 Comments
