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Wednesday 4 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40176) - you deserved it (3343)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I tried to get my golden retriever to stand in front of our church for a very short time to illustrate the point of a sermon. When I brought my dog up, he mounted the pastor's leg and began humping him. FML

#20873553
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39641) - you deserved it (9335)

On 09/08/2013 at 9:42pm - animals - by sillydoggy - United States

Today, after 8 months of being belittled and treated like trash at my job as a prep cook in a high-end kitchen, I stood up for myself to the line cooks. Not only did everyone laugh at me, I got fired for causing a scene during service and insubordination. FML

#20869973
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39313) - you deserved it (9400)

On 09/06/2013 at 7:45am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I was asked to dumb myself down so the people I was training could comprehend what I was saying. FML

#20868484
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39165) - you deserved it (6754)

On 09/05/2013 at 2:57am - work - by Retarded (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent a large portion of the afternoon playing hide and seek with the door-to-door salesman who saw me sneak in the back door and won't stop knocking. No amount of hiding behind the couch will make him go away. FML

#20867080
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38838) - you deserved it (7107)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by my back hurts - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and best friend decided to "help" by assembling my new front porch while I was away. Ecstatic, they displayed their handiwork. It's charming how the porch is precariously balanced, it leans in such a way that it appears it will fall over if you walk through the front door. FML

#20876742
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38812) - you deserved it (3347)

On 09/11/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

#20865600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38778) - you deserved it (10678)

On 09/03/2013 at 1:03am - work - by CodyS - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that if I say "make a sandwich", it doesn't matter what context it's in, or whether it's a command or just me describing my day; I'll be yelled at anyway by my hipster roommate for being a "sexist cunt", then end up apologizing just to get her to shut up. FML

#20868968
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38700) - you deserved it (5488)

On 09/05/2013 at 3:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a soon-to-be-ex co-worker flew into a rage when she saw she wasn't on the schedule for next week. The boss told her it's because she quit. She reminded the boss she wants to keep working part-time. My new job is inventing tasks for her to do to keep her calm. FML

#20869282
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38556) - you deserved it (2461)

On 09/05/2013 at 7:29pm - work - by Zuzubat (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my new creative writing teacher informed the class that we should consult him before writing anything "dark or disturbing." I only took the class because my therapist recommended that I join the class so I could freely express my darker thoughts without her help or a fear of being judged. FML

#20866346
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38532) - you deserved it (2912)

On 09/03/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by depressed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML

#20866691
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37961) - you deserved it (6805)

On 09/03/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by JustAnotherFML23 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to my first class of the year. The first thing the teacher said was, "I hate this f*cking school." FML

#20867651
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37652) - you deserved it (2979)

On 09/04/2013 at 4:39pm - misc - by swana99 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized how nice it was that, after moving into my ground-floor apartment, I no longer have to worry about being too loud walking on the floor at night. Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbors do not have any qualms about shouting or stomping their feet loudly at night, either. FML

#20865605
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37630) - you deserved it (3409)

On 09/03/2013 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)



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