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Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML

#17588509
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32207) - you deserved it (2938)

On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

#19477663
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24767) - you deserved it (2938)

On 04/16/2012 at 8:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while entering the building I live in, I walked into my neighbor who winked at me and said last night must have been great. After I asked why, he said he could hear my girlfriend moaning and screaming, and that I must be pretty good at it. I was just coming back from a week overseas. FML

#4394245
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65874) - you deserved it (2937)

On 08/08/2009 at 9:56pm - intimacy - by ouch (man) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)

Today, my boyfriend announced he has stopped wearing deodorant because he thinks his BO smells "manly." FML

#13991584
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28823) - you deserved it (2937)

On 11/26/2010 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I've been on the same train for two hours at a standstill due to "signal problems". We can't get off because it's "unsafe". I'm on my way home from work and I can see my house through the window. FML

#15741918
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42223) - you deserved it (2937)

On 04/11/2011 at 4:07pm - misc - by bananaman - United Kingdom (London)

Today, at work, I slipped and fell on my backside. The creepy security guard offered to 'kiss it better.' FML

#18724362
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28005) - you deserved it (2937)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by only 10 more hours to go (woman) - United States

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

#19598679
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27736) - you deserved it (2937)

On 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, while I was working my shift at the store, my girlfriend appeared and asked to talk to me. Once we were alone, she burst into tears and started sobbing. Turns out someone's dad died in her favorite TV show and she wanted some comfort. FML

#19959059
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24153) - you deserved it (2937)

On 07/19/2012 at 1:36pm - love - by Mitch (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

#21275026
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32711) - you deserved it (2937)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by JulietMarie - United States (New York)

Today, I overheard my co-workers talking about how they don't need flu shots because everyone else gets them. These people are in the medical industry. FML

#21286250
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31184) - you deserved it (2937)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40am - work - by Silbax1 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML

#6268866
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26586) - you deserved it (2936)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:14am - work - by FML (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I went to our school golf banquet, after being with the team and practicing every day for a few months with them. When it came time to get the certificates, all the names were called out. Except for mine. When I asked the coach where my certificate was, he said "Who are you?". FML

#6158191
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31367) - you deserved it (2936)

On 11/04/2009 at 9:12pm - misc - by RKE (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that, if timed just right, the alarm function on my phone can be disabled by a text message. And my dad has an impeccable sense of timing. I was 20 minutes late for work. FML

#7974349
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24767) - you deserved it (2936)

On 02/07/2010 at 1:58pm - work - by Ishii (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

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