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Today, I steppd out of a bar in order to make a phone call. While I was outside, the bouncer arrivd and ropes were put up. They wouldn't let me back in, claiming I was too young and they hadn't seen me come out. I was celebrating my 26th birthday, the legal drinking age is 18. I also have looool a beard. FML

#6697068
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27625) - you deserved it (2827)

On 12/10/2009 at 6:05pm - misc - by BabyBeardy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I gave a girl I lyk a $200 diamond necklace to express how much she means to me. She gave me a hug and told me she didn't want to lose me as a friend. Nor did she want to lose her new necklace. Today, I got a $200 hug.

#6696608
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13365) - you deserved it (35883)

On 12/10/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by Henji (man) - United States (Nebraska)

TODAY , MAH GRANDPA WAS WEREING FLIP FLOPS AND WHITE SOCKS!! HE ENTERD MAH RESTROOM , AND THE MOMENT HE DID IT , I REALIZD THERE WAS NO TOILET PAPER LEFT!! I FELT TOO ASHAMD TO INTERRUPT HIS DUMP , SO I WAITD FIR HIM TO ASK FIR PAPER , HE NEVER DID AND CAME OUT WITHOUT SOCKS!! FML

#6695644
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28357) - you deserved it (4776)

On 12/10/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by dayum (man) - Mexico (Chihuahua)

Today, We Had Our Annual Office Christmas Party. The Theme Of The Party Was "Ugliest Sweater". The Winner Was A Sweater That I Have An Exact Replica Of In Closet. It's Favorite 'special Occasion', 'family Portrait An 'holiday Sweater. FML

#6695498
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20855) - you deserved it (11726)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:52pm - misc - by NotHauteCouture (woman) - United States

Today... coworker askd to borrow nail clippers so he could take care of a hangnail. He went to the bathroom...hich I thought was polite... buthen he got back to his desk and returnd clippers... there were little curly hars stuck inside. He's bald. fat FML

#6695402
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31101) - you deserved it (2731)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:41pm - work - by Hairball (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, was my birtday. I ave been eavily inting tat I want an iPone. I opened my present from my parent an found an iPone box. Ecstatic, I quickly opened it. Apparently, my parent tougt it would be funny to wrap my present, a $10 iTune gift card, in te box my Dad's iPone came in. FML

#6695365
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30831) - you deserved it (7497)

On 12/10/2009 at 3:38pm - money - by muggle68 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Taday after having a shower, I walked back into my room butt naked. As I looked up I saw the window cleaner staring right at me. I looked. He looked. And without thinking I dropped straight to the floor to hid myself, then realized my naked butt was still staring right at him. FML

#6694973
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16180) - you deserved it (5727)

On 12/10/2009 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

allmidnighteyes's comment : I'm gonna invent something to prevent this from happening. I'll just drape some long pieces of fabric over a rod screwed into the wall above the window that can be adjusted to cover x amount of the window. I'll call it a curtain. I'LL MAKE MILLIONS.

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Today..!! I got a call from mah grlfriend of 13 months!! She told me that she had gotten chlamydia from the guy she cheated on me with..!! and that I most likely have it too!! I gave her a diamond ring..!! she gave me chlamydia!! mega FML

#6694429
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (2520)

On 12/10/2009 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by Godi (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, math TA showd the class how one of her ( dumb ) students answerd a test question. Everyone laughd as she wrote out the students answer, including myself, until I lookd down at answer sheet an saw that I submittd an identical answer. FML

#6693694
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8495) - you deserved it (25196)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my daughter's school calld to inform me that I needd to bring her some sneakers. Not feeling like driving the 15 minutes to her school, I told them I was away from town. Then I realizd I was on my house phone. FML

#6692525
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5378) - you deserved it (64615)

On 12/10/2009 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought steering wheel, the gas pedal, an brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realizd I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31045) - you deserved it (12949)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

I found myself locked out of mah house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, mah hood fell over mah head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise an ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell an broke mah wrist. FML

#6691654
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25863) - you deserved it (4653)

On 12/10/2009 at 6:47am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, I didn't get promoted, but the guy who showed up to work drunk a few weeks ago did. FML

#6691372
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29446) - you deserved it (2597)

On 12/10/2009 at 5:38am - work - by Hmmwtf (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)



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