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Today, I really wanted something to drink . I looked in the fridge, an found some of my looool grandma's soy milk . I decide to take a swig, an instead of tasting soy, I tasted rotten chicken . Turns out my grandma knew I drink her soy milk an decided to swap it with expired chicken broth . FML

#6689235
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8564) - you deserved it (36286)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:41am - work - by souped (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. mega FML

#6688959
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33940) - you deserved it (2352)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:24am - work - by g_unit (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today I was walking through the bar area of the restaurant I work at and fell on ass!! Customers complained to manager that I shouldn't be drinking on the job!! FML

#6688829
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24457) - you deserved it (2542)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:14am - love - by Melinda (woman) - United States (California)

Today... I went down on my grlfriend after sharing a romantic moment. As I was licking... she giggled and said "You sound like a dog." Romance ruined. FML

#6687460
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17449) - you deserved it (3853)

On 12/09/2009 at 10:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Yesterday, it was raining downtown. I saw an elderly woman crossing the street so I lend her mah umbrella looool and help her across. When we get to the other side, she says "Thank you Toby," and then refuses to give back "her" umbrella to me, loudly enough fir a nereby cop to hear. mega FML

#6686703
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27890) - you deserved it (2435)

On 12/09/2009 at 10:26pm - misc - by MynameisntToby (man) - United States (Texas)

Yesterday, I pulled out three chips from a bag. There were two round ones, an a skinny one, making it look like a penis. I laughed. I'm 33. FML

#6686658
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8234) - you deserved it (29131)

On 12/09/2009 at 10:24pm - misc - by HarryBeast (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was attending a drug-free lecture at school. The speaker said, ( There r many ways to quit smoking. You can try patches, gum, or even quitting cold turkey. Any questions? ) I raised my hand, and she called on me. I asked, ( How does cold turkey help? ) And then I realized. FML

#6683898
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8624) - you deserved it (36518)

On 12/09/2009 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today , I received a 4 page letter in the post from a woman telling me she was Alan's wife!! She spoke about their wedding in 2004 , their two beautiful kids who love their daddy very much (she included pictures) , and how much she loves him!! Alan is mah husband of 7 years!! real FML

#6683091
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48104) - you deserved it (2640)

On 12/09/2009 at 6:47pm - love - by _RobotInDisguise (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

kitkatkelly's comment : Hey, you had him first. Seriously though, this is so sad :\

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MY GIRLFRIEND BROKE UP WIT ME FIR BIENG SUPERFICIAL. SE SAID I WAS SUPERFICIAL CUZ I PAID $100 FIR ACNE MEDICATION , CUZ SE ALWAYS COMPLAIND ABOUT OW MUC ACNE I AD. FML

#6682554
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32268) - you deserved it (2368)

On 12/09/2009 at 5:19pm - love - by Superficial (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today... I was looking at my wedding pictures I ad just orderd an I trid to flick someting off one of te pictures... but it wouldn't come off. In a panic I quickly lookd troug all of my pictures an realizd tat I ad a booger sticking out of my nose. No one told me. FML

#6681986
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32523) - you deserved it (3662)

On 12/09/2009 at 4:06pm - love - by boogerbrain (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

I was going into an office building. There was a boy and a man ahead of me, and the boy held the door open for me. Surprised, I said "What a nice young man," and he said. "It's ok, ma'am; my dad says to always hold the doors open for old ladies." I'm 43. FML

#6681968
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24386) - you deserved it (5640)

On 12/09/2009 at 4:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watcing TV wit my mom . Te new Trojan Ecstasy looool condom commercial came on . I sat tere awkwardly wile my mom pulld out er sopping list . I bet you can guess wat se addd . FML

#6680888
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20653) - you deserved it (2025)

On 12/09/2009 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by aawkward... (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I received my camera in the mail. I had sent it back to the company because it wouldn't turn on. As I was reading the note they putted in, it said, "Battery was putted in backwards. No other problems found." FML

#6680274
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5668) - you deserved it (41671)

On 12/09/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by her0x3her0ine617 (woman) - United States (New York)



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