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By  leary96  |  15

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By  leary96  |  15

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  Jayy_Dash23  |  9

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  guitarman1400  |  3

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  audreys510  |  15

#4: I've been thanked several times by elderly African American men for "dressing like a lady" while out running errands. I think that your scenario is perfectly plausible.

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  noxvita83  |  8

That's a different story. If that was the case, he would have said, "Thanks for dressing like a lady" or "Thanks for having some semblance of humility" or something along those lines.

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  snoopy325  |  23

I've been thanked numerous times for my modesty. Chances are, he wasn't referring to her figure at all. Why shouldn't a religious man go to a water park if he enjoys it? Women are in skimpy clothing at the grocery store, there's really no escape from it. I like bikinis as much as the next girl, but I wouldn't have taken his comments as an insult unless he actually said the suit was better for my body type.

By  leary96  |  15

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By  Adam5858  |  17

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By  olpally  |  32

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By  Mauskau  |  32

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By  Polynomial  |  28

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  singer0421  |  32

@73, I totally understand your idea that a person's character isn't defined by her clothing, but you have to understand that *typically* women in really tiny and revealing string bikinis are looking for attention through their clothing whereas women in reserved swimsuits such as one-pieces are not. That's why women in conservative suits normally appear to be more respectable.

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  RatPoison  |  7

I mean...Dude...It's a stomach. What's so conservative about whether or not you show a stomach while swimming? Who's going to be like: "Unf. That stomach's got me all riled up". o_o

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  singer0421  |  32

It's not only a stomach though. It's literally every single part of a girl's body except for those socially unacceptable to be revealed in public. It's fabric that's pretty much smaller than underwear. Plus, decency is relative. If someone were to wear the equivalent of a tankini in a work setting, she'd be indecent because the people around her are in more conservative clothing. At a beach, though, a girl in a tankini is considered conservative because the people around her are in tiny bikinis. That's why just revealing or not revealing a stomach can completely alter the view on how decent a girl's swimsuit is. Relativity.

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I think this debate is stupid honestly. We'll make women who wear bikinis feel like they aren't classy? What if she just lost a lot of weight want wanted to show off what she accomplished? While clothing can change the perception of someone's dignity, that doesn't mean they aren't a classy person personality wise. There are exceptions.

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88, "typically"? Where are you getting your information? Sounds like a whole lotta judgement rather than actual facts about a woman that dresses a certain way. Even if someone wore less to attract attention, why's that bad? Everyone needs attention, it's natural to crave it. It amazes me how boys take women dressing a certain way to mean they're desperate for their attention. People dress for themselves, not you, which is why someone bigger weight-wise might wear a bikini. I feel really bad for the women in you guys' lives if you honestly think that a manner of dressing is indicative of anything other than what they like to wear.

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And @78.... you can judge a prostitute all you want, but the fact remains that there's a difference between prostitute and someone wearing a short skirt. Correlation does not equal causation, folks. It's scary that wearing certain clothes can make you lose respect for anyone, especially someone you don't even know. Try placing value on actual traits and personality, I guarantee you'd weed out "unrespectable" people a lot more effectively that way.

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  singer0421  |  32

There's nothing wrong with wearing something just because you like it. But why do you like it? Is it flattering? Is it reserved? Is it skimpy? Maybe you just like the polka dots. But behind every outfit is a reason to be wearing it. The reason behind wearing the tiniest bathing suit possible is *typically* (yes, typically) to show off your body. Whether you lost weight, you think it's flattering, you want a boyfriend, or whatever the reason, tiny bikinis are used to show off a woman's body. I understand that choosing to wear a bikini doesn't define a person's character or mean she's a bad person. However, wanting to flaunt your body by revealing as much of it as possible *typically* means you want some sort of attention. On the other hand, going some place without flaunting as much skin as possible is respectable because it shows that the person doesn't need other people's approval of appearance, thus showcasing the person's independence, decency, self-discipline, and self-respect. I also know that lots of women wear bikinis to showcase self-confidence in her body. But a person can be self-confident without telling the whole world about it. When you choose to not tell the whole world, your confidence shines through your personality, not your body. Personally, I consider that to be respectable.

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  singer0421  |  32

In response to your #148 comment, as much as that would be ideal, society will never not judge appearances. Appearance *typically* (not always--I know there are exceptions) reflects a person's character. If your were a manager, who would you hire: the woman in a classy business suit or the woman in a crop top and miniskirt (assuming they both had similar experience and credentials to offer)? If a guy hits on you, is it creepy or flattering? If he's ugly, he's taken to be creep. If he's good-looking, he's taken to be a confident flirt. As great as it would be if it didn't, appearance will always matter, at least a little bit.

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149, I'm actually a little disturbed by you judging a person's decency, self-discipline, and confidence on what they wear. In your job interview situation, yes, there is absolutely an appropriate and inappropriate thing to wear based on the manners and customs of the business. But a formal interview and someone walking around in a swimsuit is a very different thing. I find it even more alarming that you're a girl, because the idea that a woman is equal to what her clothing suggests is very misogynist and harmful. People are not what they wear. Placing any assumption on what someone is (or isn't) wearing and assuming they're looking for anything in particular by wearing it is just unfair and inaccurate and leads to more extreme beliefs that use that same logic.

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  singer0421  |  32

I don't think you heard everything I said. I quote: "I understand that choosing to wear a bikini doesn't define a person's character or mean she's a bad person." It would be great if society never judged a person based on appearances. That's obviously the ideal situation. I'm just saying that it's not completely realistic. I don't make cemented-in-stone judgments on a person's character only based on her clothing. I do, however, take it into consideration because this person directly and voluntarily chose to present herself in this particular manner to everyone. Realistically, clothing is a choice which is often based on an already developed character; this usually causes clothing to reflect at least part (whether that part is tiny or giant) of a person's character. Also, I'm not a misogynist nor do I equate clothing to complete character. I merely take it into consideration.

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  JonDG  |  12

#73 actually, nobody deserves respect until proven otherwise. im not gonna respect someone just cuz they exist. I might be acting respectful towards you but that doesnt mean that I actually respect you. I do believe, however, that everyone deserves to be talked to respectfully.

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