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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend got a detention for public display of affection. We go to different schools. FML

#20937522
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50936) - you deserved it (3518)

On 10/29/2013 at 12:24am - love - by cmart_9 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, the creepy regular customer found out I was lying about having a boyfriend in order to keep him away. He now thinks this is me playing hard to get. FML

#20916055
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38252) - you deserved it (4071)

On 10/11/2013 at 2:09am - work - by Itsnotmeitsyou (woman) - Australia

Today, I went with my boyfriend to his church youth group for the first time. I found out a girl there likes him, when she decided to pull me off him while we were hugging, and take my place. FML

#20903481
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40892) - you deserved it (2664)

On 10/01/2013 at 4:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML

#20902324
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35027) - you deserved it (8105)

On 09/30/2013 at 6:41pm - intimacy - by A.Summers (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my boyfriend called me a selfish bitch and dumped me after I told him I'm planning on getting much-needed breast reduction surgery. FML

#20903440
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51772) - you deserved it (11288)

On 10/01/2013 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Ggirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposed to come today and do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML

#20939175
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40830) - you deserved it (12618)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by English_Nut117 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

#20927152
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41059) - you deserved it (4183)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:06am - love - by ShittyProposal - United States (Ohio)

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

#20929399
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28759) - you deserved it (9644)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, trying to be romantic, I started coming on to my wife while in bed, only for her to yet again say she wasn't in the mood. When I asked why she never is lately, she sarcastically blamed it on the government shutdown, then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#20916670
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48901) - you deserved it (5224)

On 10/11/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by (-__- ) ( ^.^) (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boss told me that my attitude to work is awesome and that he'd follow my example of coming in half-an-hour early every day from now on. I relish those 30 minutes as the only time I can get work done without him constantly interrupting me. So much for that. FML

#20919859
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42632) - you deserved it (2903)

On 10/14/2013 at 6:38am - work - by Karansuni (woman) - Germany

Today, someone stole my umbrella. It was pouring heavily, and I was using it at the time. FML

#20914908
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36033) - you deserved it (2552)

On 10/10/2013 at 7:27am - misc - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia

Today, my boyfriend broke a glass in the kitchen and accidentally stepped on it, cutting his foot. He asked me if I could help him clean his cut. Apparently, he's ticklish and I now have a huge bruise on my chest from where he kicked me. FML

#20929509
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36221) - you deserved it (2946)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:24pm - health - by ouch.... (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML

#20923824
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39586) - you deserved it (3771)

On 10/17/2013 at 9:43am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)



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