Today, I had to be treated for chemical burns, because my mother got the bright idea of using paint thinner to clean me up after I'd painted our living room. FML

By Anonymous / Thursday 11 October 2012 19:03 / United Kingdom
By iblamethetories / Thursday 11 October 2012 17:49 / United Kingdom - Colchester

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

By wdunn69733 / Thursday 11 October 2012 14:30 / United States - Macon

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

By goodeyesight - / Thursday 11 October 2012 14:02 / Brazil - S?o Paulo
By Failed Parent / Thursday 11 October 2012 06:59 / United States

Today, I was placed firmly in the friend-zone. By my wife. We've been married 10 years. She doesn't want a divorce, she says it'd be too "time-consuming." FML

By agh marriage - / Thursday 11 October 2012 05:56 / Australia - Albany Creek

Today, a haunted house opened up next to my restaurant and they've gotten into the habit of scaring me as I'm cleaning up at night. They stay open for another month. FML

By Wolf145 / Thursday 11 October 2012 05:28 / United States - San Francisco

Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML

By Anonymous / Thursday 11 October 2012 05:08 / United States - Amarillo
FML - The follow-up
AdamwithanA Say more :
There wasn't much I could do. She was there then gone and I have no idea who she was.
By AdamwithanA - / Thursday 11 October 2012 03:36 / Canada - Surrey
By maniac11 - / Tuesday 11 October 2011 00:58 / United States
Loading data…
  Spicy