by Shelbitchh / 07/28/2011 at 5:11am / United States / Intimacy
Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML
by Champion the wonder horse / 07/28/2011 at 4:15am / United States / Work
RebornProblem's comment : Maybe you should take a shower more often.
Today, my husband threw out all of the spices in the cupboard. When I asked him why he said, "Our cat was named Spicy and I can't stand to look at them." Our recently deceased cat's name was Dicey. FML
by Tali / 07/28/2011 at 2:18am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
by anonymous / 07/28/2011 at 1:39am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
MCVelvet1497's comment : Oh, shit balls.
by cocokiss410 / 07/28/2011 at 12:34am / United States (North Carolina) / Transportation
Today, I went to El Pollo Loco for the $10.00 special. I ordered from the pimple-faced kid at the register, pulled out two fives, and he said, "That'll be 9.70, I gave you the senior discount." I'm 10 years away from that. Thank you? FML
by Not That Old / 07/28/2011 at 12:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
lindsaysue's comment : Take the discount and be happy about it! The poor kid didn't have to give it to you...
Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML
by Nickname / 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
by ladytyy / 07/27/2011 at 7:45pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by supergirl7 / 07/27/2011 at 6:21pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by IIIlibras / 07/27/2011 at 5:28pm / United States (Louisiana) / Health
by corasmom / 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML
by Nick / 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by buiuuum / 07/27/2011 at 12:35pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids