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Sunday 13 July 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I ran into my boyfriend of 5 years. The weird thing was that he was supposed to be in Iran. The even weirder thing was that he was with his wife and kids. FML

#21212869
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72472) - you deserved it (5722)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:49pm - love - by someonepleasehelpme (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65501) - you deserved it (8423)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching adult videos in my apartment. I'm deaf, so I didn't realize my volume was at full blast until I put my hand over the speaker. FML

#21206881
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62834) - you deserved it (13375)

On 07/12/2014 at 10:00am - intimacy - by weeping_angel_ - United States (New York)

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML

#21210956
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59510) - you deserved it (4433)

On 07/16/2014 at 4:09pm - love - by betrayed (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had my third date with a lovely guy. After I got home, I figured I'd try to see if I could find his Facebook profile. I did. His pictures were nice; lovely wedding photos for sure, and his newborn baby is adorable. FML

#21207995
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59415) - you deserved it (5028)

On 07/13/2014 at 2:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house, intending to break up with him. Instead, I was greeted by his whole family throwing me a surprise party. I had to sit and listen to his whole family talk about what a great couple we are and how we're going to last forever. FML

#21215195
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57263) - you deserved it (9189)

On 07/20/2014 at 1:59pm - love - by I Feel Horrible - United States (California)

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML

#21213268
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57014) - you deserved it (10918)

On 07/18/2014 at 7:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML

#21210892
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55155) - you deserved it (3865)

On 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm - kids - by fuck you, kid (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55151) - you deserved it (7452)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

#21211411
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55064) - you deserved it (4714)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm - misc - by Is that..? - United States (Colorado)

Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML

#21209385
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54533) - you deserved it (6750)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:25pm - intimacy - by thedoc (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, every house in my neighborhood was vandalized. They skipped our house. Everybody thinks it was me. FML

#21209396
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54360) - you deserved it (4049)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:35pm - misc - by chloecamp - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML

#21214404
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54175) - you deserved it (7616)

On 07/19/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by Death By Parent (woman) - United States



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