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Today, while on my graveyard shift at an inner-city backpackers lodge, a drunk pissed in a dorm at 4am. I had to clean up after him, wash all the luggage that got dowsed, clean up 2 separate piles of puke, and help 3 drunken Brits back to their room while they abused me. I have a science degree. FML

#8468411
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26528) - you deserved it (3518)

On 02/20/2010 at 2:29am - work - by underachiever (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, thanks to a particularly spicy bowl of noodles, my nose decided it would rather be a fountain. A fountain of blood. FML

#15129596
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26411) - you deserved it (3518)

On 02/26/2011 at 5:59pm - health - by mwja (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend changed his relationship status on Facebook to "Single" and his status to "I'm not kidding, leave your key on the counter." FML

#18763355
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36920) - you deserved it (3518)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:52am - love - by Janie (woman) - United States

Today, I was on the subway head bobbing to my favorite track when the guy across from me gets up, punches me in the face and says, "Don't nod at my wife like that." FML

#19113390
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28777) - you deserved it (3518)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

#20865414
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46220) - you deserved it (3518)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm - work - by smurftastic (man) - United States (California)

Today, I missed my flight. Why? My niece thought it would be funny to empty out my suitcase and hide inside. FML

#4226931
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51409) - you deserved it (3517)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Korea Republic of (Inch'on-jikhalsi)

Today, my girlfriend told me how disappointed and depressed she was that she could never make me hard. She started ranting about her looks and how she fails at everything. I didn't know how to reply. I was hard while she told me. FML

#6030769
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20740) - you deserved it (3517)

On 10/27/2009 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by timmynotjimmy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom and I were escorted out of the KFC because my mom tried to mug and pick a fight with another customer. FML

#14854535
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28835) - you deserved it (3517)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:28pm - misc - by lifesux - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML

#19503572
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25481) - you deserved it (3517)

On 04/20/2012 at 10:48pm - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my obsessive ex, who recently cut my phone line to stop me from talking to my boyfriend of three years, got a job at the same restaurant where both my boyfriend and I work. FML

Today, I had to wake up at 4am because my boss set an important business meeting for first thing in the morning. After making sure everything was ready, I went to work. My boss ended up oversleeping and moved the meeting to tomorrow. FML

Today, I found out that my parents were artists when they met. My mom said that I was one of their best projects yet. My sister, hearing what my mother said, broke my week-old PS3 in a rage. FML

#20699851
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48928) - you deserved it (3516)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:31pm - misc - by H1dd3n (man) - United States (California)

Today, I received a package from my deployed husband. It contained a scarf, a letter, and a bag full of his pubes. FML

#21310077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31788) - you deserved it (3516)

On 12/02/2014 at 12:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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