Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mom announced to everyone that she wants at least ten grandchildren. I'm an only child. FML

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to be a stripper when she grew up, just like daddy's girlfriend. We're still married. FML

#8300891
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39297) - you deserved it (3455)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:58pm - love - by ShayisPay101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant with me. She had a beer in her hand. FML

#16966151
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42749) - you deserved it (3455)

On 07/03/2011 at 10:02pm - health - by wastedbaby - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I bought $250 worth of groceries and was feeling rather good about myself because it's the first time I've been able to do so in months. When I returned home I found my fridge/freezer broken. Most of the food I bought was dairy or frozen. FML

#20875436
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47392) - you deserved it (3455)

On 09/10/2013 at 3:35am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while lifeguarding, a kid thought it'd be hilarious to take a crap in the pool. The other kids freaked out and rushed to get out. Several of them slipped on the way out and hurt themselves fairly badly. Two parents are now threatening to sue us, and my boss blames me. FML

#21096273
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41709) - you deserved it (3455)

On 03/25/2014 at 5:53pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML

#7967953
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32904) - you deserved it (3454)

On 02/07/2010 at 9:18am - work - by Ryan - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

#13442719
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27617) - you deserved it (3454)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my fiancé decided he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML

#18135623
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38909) - you deserved it (3454)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:49am - love - by heatherjo - United States

Today, my dad decided to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together, causing mud to fly all over me. This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wearing my white wedding dress just before getting married. FML

#20989738
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56023) - you deserved it (3454)

On 12/12/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by >.> (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at my aunt's wedding, the time for the tossing of the bouquet came and the announcer asked for all the single ladies to gather behind the bride. I was the only one. FML

#17479569
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39656) - you deserved it (3453)

On 08/15/2011 at 10:45am - love - by single lady - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

#19633395
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22200) - you deserved it (3453)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:38pm - misc - by HK (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I had a dream that my ex-boyfriend had become a vicious serial killer and was hunting me down because I broke up with him. I don't know what scares me more: the way he hunted me in my sleep, or the fact that it wouldn't surprise me if it actually happened. FML

#19958664
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22787) - you deserved it (3453)

On 07/19/2012 at 11:55am - love - by InsomniacToBe - United States (Utah)



FML's blog

  • Essa's illustrated FML
  • Yesterday was labor day in the US. FML is international, and and specifically US-centric, but we still sat around doing nothing because we'll take any excuse to do anything. We'll endorse any national…

Friday 1 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: