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Friday 15 November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house at 9am to surprise him on our 1 year anniversary. In the process, I gatecrashed another celebration he was having with his second girlfriend. FML

#20962153
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57914) - you deserved it (4105)

On 11/18/2013 at 1:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was jogging on my farm when I discovered a cave. Unfortunately for me, I discovered said cave by tripping and falling into it where there was still a 10ft drop to the bottom. FML

Today, the guy I like shoved me out of the way so he could talk to another girl. FML

#20964674
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48808) - you deserved it (4630)

On 11/20/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at the gym, I realized the guy who has been staring at me for the past 3 days is the same guy I promised to text back 5 months ago. FML

#20954898
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22161) - you deserved it (45683)

On 11/12/2013 at 6:18am - love - by awkwardencounters - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while taking an order over the phone for the customer at work, I began to hear slight moans. The moans gradually became faster and louder, until climax was achieved and I realized I was being used for phone sex. FML

#20955245
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43328) - you deserved it (3501)

On 11/12/2013 at 3:29pm - work - by long day - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML

#20959118
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44747) - you deserved it (4315)

On 11/15/2013 at 8:53pm - kids - by I don't know, son (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while on a family Disney world vacation, I saw a kid shitting on a public bathroom's floor. It was my kid. He's 10. FML

#20960450
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42057) - you deserved it (10844)

On 11/17/2013 at 12:33am - kids - by Anonymous -

Today, I was cussed out by a customer who was unhappy, and he asked to speak with my manager. When I told him I owned the store, he said that that was the problem. Apparently women are "too flaky" to run a bakery properly. FML

#20964215
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42847) - you deserved it (2833)

On 11/20/2013 at 2:59am - work - by bakingwomannnnnnnn (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I forgot I left my tampons in a grocery bag packed with food that I put into the fridge. I realized two hours later while frantically looking for a tampon. I'm still cold down there. FML

#20966555
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40539) - you deserved it (11865)

On 11/22/2013 at 1:53am - misc - by InsertPopcicle (woman) - United States

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45730) - you deserved it (6995)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

#20957459
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41273) - you deserved it (4442)

On 11/14/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by CallmeEddie - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML

#20960650
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43509) - you deserved it (3979)

On 11/17/2013 at 8:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML



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