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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I woke up to see that I had two black eyes from a cheerleading stunt gone wrong yesterday. I decided to curl my hair to distract from them. While curling my hair I accidentally burned my cheek. I now have two black eyes and a huge burn on my cheek. My extended family is coming tomorrow. FML

#6926304
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24231) - you deserved it (6750)

On 12/24/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26949) - you deserved it (11875)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

triciaharris1's comment : 1st RULE: You do not talk about FIGHT CLUB. 2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about FIGHT CLUB. 3rd RULE: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the fight is over. 4th RULE: Only two guys to a fight. 5th RULE: One fight at a time. 6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes. 7th RULE: Fights will go on as long as they have to. 8th RULE: If this is your first night at FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight.

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Today, I found out my mom is getting rid of cable TV. My dad and I bought her a 700 dollar plasma screen TV for Christmas. FML

#6922961
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23491) - you deserved it (2889)

On 12/24/2009 at 2:45pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I learned just how much change a toddler can stuff in to a Nintendo Wii. I also learned that those things are put together with special screws. FML

#6919717
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23504) - you deserved it (3714)

On 12/24/2009 at 10:49am - kids - by Gameless Guy - United States

Today, I found out that I have to work Christmas Day. There's no public transport running and taxis are triple fare. It'll cost me more getting to work than I'll actually earn during the shift. FML

#6917997
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27716) - you deserved it (2081)

On 12/24/2009 at 6:20am - work - by Barstaff (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I used the tanning booth for the first time. Not only was I so white that I received first-degree burns all over my body, but I also forgot to remove my knee-high socks. FML

#6917570
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7041) - you deserved it (42100)

On 12/24/2009 at 5:06am - health - by Ellowise (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I saw the girl I had confessed my love to two years ago on the bus. We chatted for a few minutes and she got off on the first stop, saying that this is where she had to get off. Twenty minutes later, I see her in the bus next to mine. The bus number was 20. Like mine. FML

#6917396
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24310) - you deserved it (4892)

On 12/24/2009 at 4:35am - love - by busrides (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went home, where I live alone, from my dorm room at my university. The only Christmas cards I had received were addressed to the person that lived there before me. FML

#6916745
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22884) - you deserved it (2045)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:18am - misc - by LonelySanta (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I stepped outside for a smoke. It was 1 a.m. Thinking no one was around, I let out a series of loud, nasty-sounding farts. I looked over to my left to see the neighbor, whom I've never met, also smoking, and staring at me. That was his first impression of me. FML

#6915702
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9630) - you deserved it (30242)

On 12/24/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by FlGirl (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

#6914931
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33590) - you deserved it (2780)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:09am - love - by Nemesis2747 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that while anybody can call me a bitch, my husband got mad at his aunt for calling our dog a mutt. FML

#6914800
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25870) - you deserved it (3385)

On 12/24/2009 at 1:02am - love - by stupid_world (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I flew my wife, myself and three kids to pay a surprise visit to my parents who were going to be alone for Christmas. When we arrived, we found out they decided to go on vacation. We have nowhere to go. FML

#6914646
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11260) - you deserved it (24552)

On 12/24/2009 at 12:54am - misc - by homeless4Christmas (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I shared the story of my younger brother's unexpected death with a friend. After telling him the story, I looked at him with teary eyes and he looked back into my eyes and said "I understand how you feel. That is almost as bad as when I lost my cat last spring term." FML

#6914184
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31709) - you deserved it (3024)

On 12/24/2009 at 12:31am - animals - by Beeh (woman) - United States



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