Miscellaneous: Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo...

By calliefml - 26/04/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 795

You deserved it 6 164

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By brebre101 - 31/07/2011 09:05 - Canada

Today, I walked in on my brother performing voodoo on a doll with my picture taped to its face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 181

You deserved it 4 921

By funnymanjoe - 14/09/2011 11:06 - United States

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 762

You deserved it 5 738

By roomingwithevil - 09/05/2012 23:26 - United States - Slinger

Today, I found out who my randomly assigned roommate was. Out of 10,000+ people, I just happen to get assigned a girl who threatened to kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 762

You deserved it 2 069

By Woops - 27/08/2014 22:57 - United States - Secaucus

Today, a schoolmate I've always secretly hated came over to my place to hang out. She found her way to my room and instantly noticed my dartboard, which I'd taped a picture of her face onto. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 817

You deserved it 47 299

By piece of shed - 31/08/2011 14:00 - United States

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 250

You deserved it 3 504

By HousemateHorror - 20/11/2017 19:00

Today, I walked into my dorm to find the guy I have feelings for sleeping with my roommate. I signed a lease with them for next year and can't back out now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 264

You deserved it 579

By Anonymous - 07/01/2014 21:24 - United States

Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 367

You deserved it 5 212

College life

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 11:33 - Germany

Today, I arrived in my dorm at 3 am to find my roommate passed out and a nauseating stench. While I was gone, he got drunk and puked all over the walls, carpet, and both beds. His inebriated attempt to clean up the mess consisted of smearing his vomit everywhere with my shower robe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 993

You deserved it 2 363

By powsser - 11/03/2009 13:38 - United States

Today, my roommate got mad at me for putting away the tampons that were sitting on her desk. She rebelled by hanging hundreds of tampons dyed red from every surface in our dorm room. I discovered this while giving my mom her first tour of the place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 414

You deserved it 5 714

By Anonymous - 02/03/2011 11:20 - United States

Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 578

You deserved it 6 347

jhkmyun 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:07

Yikes, creepy much?

24788 6

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:09

That's some creepy shit.

Comments

samxoxoxolala 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:05

weirdddd first!

maddieguinn 0

Sunday 18 April 2010 22:34

this is soooooo funny!!!!!!!!

rockintothebeat 0

Saturday 1 May 2010 14:15

haha shane dawson did a reenactment(sp?) of this in one of his videos

xlostwithoutu 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 9:42

Shane Dawson reenacted this (:

Ilikecats43 0

Tuesday 11 September 2012 11:08

I remember that!!

jhkmyun 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:07

Yikes, creepy much?

hootersgirl09 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:07

hahahahah WTF maybe thats not an FML but its funny and kind of creepy. get a new roommate btw!

ZiggyMorrison 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:07

I'm thinking maybe this is bullshit but if it isnt than definatly FYL maybe you should sleep with a 9mm from now on

24788 6

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:09

That's some creepy shit.

sLap_fml 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:14

that's pretty ****** up what'd you do?

ammali 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:15

O______o

SpliffyMcBlunt 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:16

good I hope you die bitch! (joke)

fyour_own_life 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:19

made up.

BigLord 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 16:21

If this is real then that roommate and yourself need to talk. Urgently.

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Facebook AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Education Relatable Students Technology Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 536

You deserved it 65 008

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 636

You deserved it 42 714

The Top

Today, on my first day at a new job, my boss asked how old I was. I replied, "Eighteen." She responded that she was my age thirty years ago, which makes her the same age as my mum. When I told her, she gave me a puzzled look, so I repeated myself. She was my age thirteen years ago, not thirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 271

You deserved it 14 385

Today, my boyfriend posted a status on Facebook saying what a great girlfriend he had. Flattered, I commented on it, saying that I felt the same about him. Turns out he was talking about his other girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 772

You deserved it 286

Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 164

You deserved it 4 478

Today, I was supposed to hear from my supervisor about whether or not my company was going to be letting me go. I've been on continual probation for the last 6 months, waiting to hear when they'll decide. She'd said last Friday that I'd definitely hear from her today. It's now 5:30 p.m. She's gone home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 490

You deserved it 622

Today, I realized that the woman I love, who is my best friend, deserves better than me at the nadir of my life. We're still just friends, but she's been a much better friend to me than I have been to her. It's time to disappear and fix myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 427

Today, I was replacing some outlets for work and I got surprise-electrified. I threw my wire strippers in the air while yelling, "Oh fuck me." The homeowner and his 2 kids were standing 3 feet away. He was not happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 337

You deserved it 670

Same thing different taste

College life

Top comments

Comments