The Top

After being hit, he said, "oh, oops, do you need to get out?" I was let out, and after waiting in a line of about 6 people, I made it to the restroom.

By kam3221 - 01/05/2009 04:33 - United States

Today, I got in the shower, washed my hair and shaved because I wanted to look great for a big date. I got out, brushed and dried my hair and spent an hour putting it up in the perfect hairstyle. Running late, I quickly put on my new dress, looked down and realized i had only shaved one leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 890

You deserved it 54 301

Grow a backbone time!

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 23:01 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I had to stop going to university with 2 years left because my parents feel it's not the right course for me. I am 23 years-old, living with my parents, $2 to my name and no job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 311

Unhappy Birthday

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Atlanta

Today, I should be spending my birthday with my boyfriend of 8 months. Instead he's visiting his ex, who's pregnant with a baby that "may or may not be" his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 514

You deserved it 6 565

By kas - 30/04/2009 17:41 - United States

Today, I was on my way home when I saw a cop hiding behind a Budget truck. I immediately slowed down and prayed that he wouldn't give me a ticket. Then I realized I was walking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 241

You deserved it 351

Valentine's let down

By Loveless - 18/02/2021 07:02

Today, I spent Valentine's Day with my crush. Not as a romantic thing, though. Instead, she invited me to spend the weekend at her house with her whole family for her sister's birthday party. Not the kind of invitation I had in mind, but thanks anyway. At least chocolate won't let me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 892

Lunar-Spice tells us more.

Lunar-Spice 11

Wednesday 17 February 2021 19:57

Hey, OP here! So, to explain, I've been really good friends with this girl for a while. She came out to me about six months ago, and I, in turn, came out to her. We had been dancing around topics like relationships and crushes for a long time. We've kind of flirted in the past, especially during game nights when we would play Truth Or Dare with two other close friends. We don't choose each other's truths or dares; we use an app that comes up with everything. So we have kissed in the past and sat on each other's laps, but I still didn't know how she truly felt about me. After reading some of your comments (21 and 30) who assured me that inviting me to her house was indeed a good sign, I decided to bite the bullet and confess to her. Actually, to be honest, I started by saying "I like you" and couldn't quite get the rest out. She had to make sure I meant in a romantic way. Super awkward, but we pushed past it. And to comment 22, you can go suck a lemon. She actually DOES feel the same way about me. I know, shocking. That's actually never happened before; I usually get rejected, so I couldn't quite process what was happening. And yes, she's known about my ENORMOUS crush for a while now, but for some reason didn't bring it up. It was actually comment 5 that gave me the final push to ask her. I had never heard about The Problem With Lesbian Sheep, so I had to look it up, but I am very grateful that I did. I think it was the visualization of the sheep that spurred me on. We had a movie night last night. She's a big fan of horror movies, so she popped the popcorn and I supplied the movie. I'm not sure where we'll go from here, but it's looking good guys!

Rave on

By poorclubgoer - 14/11/2009 10:11 - United States

Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 735

You deserved it 5 957

By Anonymous - 25/05/2013 22:47 - United States

Today, my parents decided that since summer is almost here, it's a great opportunity to start having nude barbecues. I found this out after walking out into the backyard, hoping to sun myself a little, only to see the living nightmare that is my parents' naked bodies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 637

You deserved it 4 899

By Anonymous - 04/08/2011 23:19 - United States

Today, my landlord told me he is raising my rent next month. I thought he was kidding until he asked if I still wanted to live here. My landlord is also my live-in boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 197

You deserved it 3 984

By fordneagles - 11/06/2012 05:56 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was using a public toilet when someone entered the stall next to mine. Instead of using the facilities, the person in there reached under the stall to steal my bag. Fortunately, I was holding the strap so they couldn't take it. Unfortunately, they decided to take my right shoe instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 939

You deserved it 2 318

fordneagles tells us more.

fordneagles 34

Monday 11 June 2012 15:40

Hey guys, I'm the OP, for those worried about the grossness of the floor, the cleaners had just been in (the wet floor sign was still there), so I just took off the other sandal and looked a bit of a bogan, but better than replacing everything in my wallet! And for the record, my bag was not on the floor, it was resting on my (previously sandalled) feet. I've never noticed any hooks in the stalls, but then I've never expected someone to try and nick my bag either.