Animals: Cute

Cute

By eyesightfail - 21/11/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, I saw a squirrel beside a tree. Thinking it was cute, I stepped closer, picked up a pine cone and tried to lure it to come closer. After about two minutes of silently squatting on someone's lawn holding a pine cone, I realized the squirrel was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 478

You deserved it 15 513

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Same thing different taste

It's alive!

By notmyrealname123 - 25/08/2014 00:08 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I found my cat downstairs with a squirrel dangling from his mouth. When I saw this, I yelled at my cat to put it down. He did. Turns out the squirrel was still alive and run. I had to spend the next three hours chasing it out of my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 724

You deserved it 6 422

I don't dare look

By TerribleAim - 12/10/2022 00:01

Today, I was trying to scare a squirrel away from my bird feeder. It was on my privacy fence, so I picked up a rock just to throw at the fence to startle it. I hit the squirrel in the head and he fell off on the other side. I don't know if he's okay or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 1 069

Red or grey?

By Cherry - 11/02/2023 02:00

Today, I tried to take a selfie with a squirrel and it bit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 1 356

By Sid - 10/04/2011 00:58 - United States

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 696

You deserved it 41 746

By Anonymous - 02/10/2015 16:48 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Today, I found a baby squirrel on the pavement and thought I'd try and rescue it. While I googled what to do, it started running around. I tried to grab it, but it ran straight into the path of a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 409

You deserved it 4 046

By ghoul - 08/03/2011 11:32

Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 847

You deserved it 4 224

Psycho

By Anonymous - 12/10/2011 05:14 - United States

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 600

You deserved it 4 229

By orilykid - 31/10/2012 17:23 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 092

You deserved it 1 957

By YOURMOM - 31/12/2011 07:24 - United States

Today, I was at the park feeding nuts to some squirrels. One fell down my shirt and the next thing I know I'm being attacked by a squirrel that looked like it was on steroids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 047

You deserved it 6 001

By RENThead - 13/09/2015 19:02 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was walking down a path in the woods behind my house when I saw a squirrel. It ran away, but little did I know it wasn't running from me, it was running from the dog that had forced Animal Control to sweep the area. I ended up with stitches in my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 858

You deserved it 1 594

Laxloverr24 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:16

haha wow. why would you try to lure it with a pine cone?! sillly., squirrels like acorns. are you nuts?! haha get it? nuts...squirrels. uhh yeaaahh.

morgan_5230 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:13

You used a pine cone? Hahaha. That's actually really sad though! :(

Comments

Jtrain615 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:12

Hah! Awesome.

silvermoonstar3 3

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:07

pinecone? If you find a LIVE one, try an acorn or some birdseed. They love birdseed.

greendaygirl999 5

Sunday 25 April 2010 7:14

Exactly. A pinecone? You can't even eat those anyway

I_iz_special 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 4:25

you can throw them in the fire and have them explode... or so I'm told.

Blabloop_Fishie 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:12

lol that made me laugh

morgan_5230 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:13

You used a pine cone? Hahaha. That's actually really sad though! :(

Laxloverr24 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:16

haha wow. why would you try to lure it with a pine cone?! sillly., squirrels like acorns. are you nuts?! haha get it? nuts...squirrels. uhh yeaaahh.

mkbella123 14

Wednesday 23 March 2011 17:11

haha, squirel puns!:D

zarabsegin 16

Wednesday 6 May 2015 20:57

Squirrel Jokes. -Spongebob

FerrariCake 2

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:19

It wasn't dead. It just didn't like you. YDI for squatting on someone's lawn.

Drunkbunny 2

Tuesday 24 November 2009 20:38

She didn't deserve it. It's not her fault that dead animals are cute. ;)

XxMidnightReader 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 3:17

yeah but how could you not notice the squirrel was dead???

X0XyentroucX0X 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:24

why the hell you would try to lure a wild animal YDI. u got ur life saved

Inky_fml 0

Monday 23 November 2009 6:15

My stepmother kept two squirrels in the house as pets, because they were "cute". They are filthy, horrible, disgusting animals. It's nice to find someone who hates squirrels as much as I do. OP: you deserve it for trying to "lure" an animal that may carry rabies, and BITES, with something that isn't even food.

pleasetryagain 0

Monday 23 November 2009 22:33

Seriously. It doesn't matter how cute they are. They're not tame, and have a good chance of carrying rabies. Jesus, when did everyone get the idea that once an animal has big eyes and soft fur that it's going to be friendly?

mkbella123 14

Wednesday 23 March 2011 17:13

32- win:3

DoctorFoxyNo1 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:30

docfox advice for today: never squat In someone else lawn UNLESS your taking a shit in it!

portlandrima 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:45

did you eat it like god asked you to???

JAB2014 1

Monday 9 April 2012 10:56

Ew...

cthulhu1138 1

Sunday 22 November 2009 1:47

Let me get this straight: you thought that a wild squirrel-- a small animal which considers humans potential predators--would be willing to come closer if you showed a pine cone of all things? Did you plan on meeting Santa Claus and/or the Tooth Fairy sometime later in the day?