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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I found out the weekly coffee talks my husband was having with his ex-girlfriend stopped involving coffee about 2 years ago. FML

#6647027
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32378) - you deserved it (18790)

On 12/07/2009 at 5:33am - love - by Jane (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

silencerider151's comment : It took you how many years to realize that private meetings between him and his ex could be a problem?

See all the comments →

Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML

#6646693
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20585) - you deserved it (3541)

On 12/07/2009 at 4:30am - intimacy - by roxyriley - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was doing homework in my room when my roommate started meowing all of a sudden. Not only was he meowing, he started to make loud cat noises that resembled a cat being run over by a car. He's gonna be my roommate for the rest of the year. FML

#6646444
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28555) - you deserved it (3058)

On 12/07/2009 at 3:54am - animals - by SeeMeInTheDark (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend invited me for dinner to meet his parents. Turns out his stepmother is my gynecologist. FML

#6645484
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37417) - you deserved it (2588)

On 12/07/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by Twiddle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a new smart phone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML

#6645209
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9433) - you deserved it (43606)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by smart phone mms - United States

Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML

#6644782
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11041) - you deserved it (37476)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by CH (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I told my boyfriend he is good at singing. Now he won't stop. FML

#6644248
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9255) - you deserved it (38722)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:31am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 5 year old son asked me to explain how he was born. After I told him I had a C-Section, he went to school and told everyone he was born at sea. I found out when the teacher called me. FML

#6643821
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23130) - you deserved it (6179)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:07am - kids - by proudparent (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it snowed. So, a guy I like and I decided to go sledding. I really wanted to impress him by going down the hill and casually slowing down at the bottom right at his feet. Instead, I crashed into him and broke his ankle. FML

#6641672
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9197) - you deserved it (31782)

On 12/06/2009 at 10:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was on a red-eye flight, and the woman beside me was chattering loudly to her friend. I opened my laptop and got to work. Suddenly, one of the women turned to me and told me that the clicking of my keyboard was too loud. She then called me an inconsiderate selfish bitch. FML

#6639706
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39298) - you deserved it (2124)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:08pm - misc - by HassledAirfarer (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a birthday present from my boyfriend's mom. It was ProActiv acne solution. He tried to make me feel better by explaining it's because she wants to be able to include me in family pictures. FML

#6636501
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35980) - you deserved it (3001)

On 12/06/2009 at 5:13pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML

#6635616
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25336) - you deserved it (9913)

On 12/06/2009 at 3:42pm - intimacy - by Ballhugger (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML

#6635379
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24390) - you deserved it (16570)

On 12/06/2009 at 3:28pm - kids - by Bill (man) - United States (Minnesota)



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