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That actually wasn't the reason. The mother was the one that decided on the name, not my dad. She did it so that he could leave my mom and me without 'losing' anything.

By I shaved my legs for this - 02/08/2018 01:30

Today, I prepared for my first date in two years. I shaved my legs, did my hair and nails, painted my face, found the perfect outfit, then waited for hours for a man who never came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 287

You deserved it 342

All you need is hate

By Anonymous - 30/08/2021 09:01

Today, I found out I only exist because my parents hated each other. They both worked in the same office and despised each other, until they had a hate-fuck in a storeroom after a blazing argument, resulting in me. I exist due to sex fuelled by hatred and lust. Yay me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 210

By howtobreakup - 11/04/2016 16:39 - United Kingdom - Worthing

Today, my friend asked me for advice on how to break up with her boyfriend. I've never done it before so I googled it, my own boyfriend happened to walk in and now isn't speaking to me. He won't believe me when I say it was "for a friend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 670

You deserved it 4 303

By foreverAlone - 04/04/2016 19:40 - United States - Chesapeake Beach

Today, I met a cute girl. She seemed really sweet and I was heartbroken to find out that she had fallen on hard times and was living in a shelter. I asked her if I could take her out to lunch. She said, "No." I can't even get a date with a homeless girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 423

You deserved it 5 261

By Unlucky - 04/09/2018 14:30

Today, I received a bill from PayPal stating I owe $350 for an account that's linked to an email that I haven't used since 2015. I can't get into the account because someone hacked it and changed the password and security questions. Customer support is no help because I have no info about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 864

You deserved it 248

By Scarred - 22/09/2018 12:00

Today, my Nana asked me to get her a book from her nightstand, but failed to specify which nightstand was hers. I stumbled across my grandparents' collection of sex toys instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 104

You deserved it 320

By CROCKIN5150 - 14/03/2016 04:32 - United States

Today, while out for a jog, I noticed that you never know how fast you run until you're being followed by someone in a car you don't know, and they're continuously honking at you. I later found out it my dad in his new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 819

You deserved it 2 327

By notsohappilyeverafter - 26/11/2011 21:54 - United States

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 208

You deserved it 3 768

By Anonymous - 13/10/2018 11:30 - United States - Bronx

Today, my cat peed on my long-term project so I had to stay up until 4 am doing the whole thing again... just for it to fall in the train tracks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 270

You deserved it 305

By Red Face, too - 24/10/2018 13:30

Today, I saw Niagra Falls. Not the one in Canada, but the one that was released when I went to check on my period at work. I had no change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 773

You deserved it 283

By DutchOven - 04/07/2009 21:07 - United States

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 419

You deserved it 25 976

By Anonymous - 18/11/2018 05:00

Today, while buying Red Dead Redemption 2, the cashier spoiled the ending. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 252

You deserved it 338

By Anonymous - 11/01/2016 21:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up to my roommate's friend rustling in the attic without permission to be there. When I asked how he got in with all doors and windows locked, he simply said, "It's a secret." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 047

You deserved it 1 414

By Mick_The_Disappointment - 11/12/2018 15:30

Today, my mother once again called me to remind me what a disappointment I am despite having two degrees, a house, a professional job and having never been unemployed at 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 192

You deserved it 210

By Helpless - 16/12/2018 14:00

Today I had to tell my girlfriend that we can't keep taking care of her drug addicted dad because it is ruining out lives. We have a 90 day notice to move and I said I won't move to a new place if she is going to have him live there. Guess who is looking for a new roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 949

You deserved it 415

By LoveSick - 06/02/2019 04:00

Today, I'm getting married. I woke up with no voice to say my I dos with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 595

You deserved it 254

By ouch - 20/02/2019 18:00

Today, me and my hubby wanted to spice things up in the bedroom. He’s always wanted to eat food off my body but never wanted to deal with the mess. He got a little too excited and ended up biting my nipple instead of the spaghetti. I didn’t know someone was capable of biting that hard on soft food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 059

You deserved it 662

By Anonymous - 18/11/2010 02:32 - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend to try and man up and act a bit tougher. He started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 108

You deserved it 20 124

By grapes - 15/11/2015 22:12 - United States - Westfield

Today, I asked my dad for help on some homework I didn't fully understand. He walked away and came back with a huge bowl of grapes and said, "Here's your brain food." Then he left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 328

You deserved it 1 902

By Shoutout1011 - 15/04/2017 22:00

Today, my 6-month-old daughter decided she'd scream every time I'd answer her cries instead of her daddy. He just left for a 12-hour shift at work. Only 11 more hours to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 644

You deserved it 480

By Mehokaay - 25/12/2016 04:23 - United States - Pearland

Today, I was working Xmas Eve. The managers let themselves off today leaving me, a severely inadequately trained employee, to handle the department. Of course the first customer interaction ended with me bursting into tears, all because I blew up her life-sized storm trooper balloon wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 741

You deserved it 863

Mehokaay tells us more.

Mehokaay 14

Monday 26 December 2016 17:03

Wow my first fml. Let me try explain my stupidity. So I work in the floral department at a grocery store. Yes I have blown up regular balloons but never the life size ones. I had seen 1 time before of a coworker using a manual air inflator in one we had on display, so I just assumed we'd use it in all parts. The lady was hovering over me the entire time so that added to me being nervous. I finished and realized I had to put weights on it...and that's when I realized I did something wrong. The lady was yelling at me "What is wrong?!" Like she could even help. And then commanding I get someone over here who knows what goes in it, (but all my floral managers were not here) and I told her that so she proceeded to tell me to call another store...Long story short she was really mad at me understandably for the amount of time I took. And I did tell her from the beginning I've never done one of these before...But luckily there was a coworker in returns who knew how to blow it up so she blew up a new one. It's helium in everything except the gun, and a leg. So it doesn't completely fly away. It doesn't seem difficult at all. Just the anxiety of being watched as you're trying to learn something new. Oh and my title for this fml I was still trying to work on it but accidentally sent it to moderation, whoops

By HighasaCloud - 10/12/2016 02:38

Today, while typing at my desk, I leaned back in my chair to stretch my arms. A spider dangling from the ceiling must have been watching me since it had perfect timing on its descent right into my open yawning mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 648

You deserved it 773