Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML By FML Team FML under the sheets PETA we are sorry about today's comic. Yes it involves cats being farted on but it's not what it's really about. What it's all about... 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share By Anonymous / Sunday 7 June 2009 15:53 / United States
By FML Team FML under the sheets PETA we are sorry about today's comic. Yes it involves cats being farted on but it's not what it's really about. What it's all about... 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Owned - Taiwan Today, me and a friend I met in the club were sandwiching this blonde girl dancing, when 5 minutes later she turned around and said that I should get another girl and gently brushed me aside. FML I agree, your life sucks 7893 You deserved it 28208 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - San Francisco Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML I agree, your life sucks 55408 You deserved it 4565 85 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Greg - 29/8/2020 05:01 Lovely Rita Today, I went to lunch with a friend in her car. I told her to park in a lot that had signs warning that we'd be towed, saying, "They never tow anyone from here. In fact, if you get towed, I'll pay for it." When we returned, her car was gone. I had to pay $145 in cash to get it back. FML I agree, your life sucks 418 You deserved it 3395 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lingling - United States - Germantown Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML I agree, your life sucks 28018 You deserved it 5944 221 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lorbibo - 14/1/2021 17:00 Yeet the guy Today, I was trying to set up a date with my boyfriend of two years, but he said he didn’t want to, and then to interrupted me to talk to his friends on Discord. FML I agree, your life sucks 708 You deserved it 134 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jess - 16/12/2020 06:02 - United States - Denver BO Central Today, I was loudly asked if I'd rubbed poop all over myself this morning. I shower three times a day, brush my teeth for 10 minutes twice a day, and wear copious amounts of antiperspirant. FML I agree, your life sucks 1231 You deserved it 1427 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML I agree, your life sucks 83014 You deserved it 6173 285 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anon O'Mous - United States Today, I was taking a shower at the gym when hearing a loud popping noise. Surprised and startled, I jumped and slipped, hitting my head against the shower wall that left a small gash. The pop noise was just someone blowing bubbles from their gum. FML I agree, your life sucks 25514 You deserved it 5677 127 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - United States Today, while at the dinner table, my grandmother told me she backed over a cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 34097 You deserved it 4435 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By luckycharmed - United States Today, my roommate played a "prank" on me. He taped a length of clear cellophane at ankle-height just outside my bedroom door, causing me to trip and faceplant the floor, and busting out a tooth. I now look like a hick, and my roommate is refusing to cover my dental bills. FML I agree, your life sucks 49631 You deserved it 4375 137 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Germany Today, after five long years of having been together, my boyfriend told me that he wanted to take our relationship to the "next level". We now have a Sims relationship. FML I agree, your life sucks 33658 You deserved it 4952 139 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was at Wal-Mart where all the aisles had been moved. An elderly woman asked me where the pet products were, so I told her that I didn't know, but showed her where they could be. An hour later, she came back with security. She'd told them I'd purposefully gotten her lost. They threw me out. FML I agree, your life sucks 32558 You deserved it 3374 117 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I was blaring the radio to drown out the sound of the kids in the apartment upstairs. They then started jumping in time with the music. FML I agree, your life sucks 3462 You deserved it 796 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By robbed - United States Today, I realized I was happy because we finally started having friends come visit us after months of not having company. I also realized that our secret stash of money was stolen last night while we had company. FML I agree, your life sucks 28737 You deserved it 4375 75 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 23/1/2021 01:02 - United States - Minneapolis Mr Nice Guy Today, it was our 12th anniversary. My husband only remembered because family members texted to wish us a happy anniversary. When he went out to the store to get groceries, he didn't even buy me flowers. He's also irritated that I "seem sad or something." FML I agree, your life sucks 929 You deserved it 154 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 5/1/2021 23:02 FEED ME Today, I woke up in a military hospital, after having all four wisdom teeth out yesterday. A nurse came in with a breakfast trolley full of eggs and bacon, looks at my pleading face, looks at her clipboard and says, "Only non-solid foods for you, private." FML I agree, your life sucks 784 You deserved it 116 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sneeuwbal - Belgium - Dilbeek Today, my girlfriend's dad called to say she wasn't allowed to come with me on a three-day trip on New Year's. He waited until Christmas to say it, even though we booked and paid for the trip nearly a month ago. Now he ruined both holidays. FML I agree, your life sucks 36691 You deserved it 3176 89 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I made out with a guy that I had just met at a party. It was my first kiss. I don't know what's worse, the fact that my first kiss is at the age of 23, or the fact that I saw him making out with a different girl later on in the night. FML I agree, your life sucks 35049 You deserved it 16572 155 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SaveMeTeddy - Canada - Burnaby Today, it hit me that I'm incredibly pathetic, when at the age of 21, I tucked my stuffed animals into bed with me, facing in different directions so they could keep watch for monsters while I slept. FML I agree, your life sucks 48004 You deserved it 16185 271 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ThunderThighs - United States - Flemington Today, I was so ashamed of my weight when I sat down and the suction of my thighs made a loud fart noise, I admitted to it being a fart rather than my fat rolls. FML I agree, your life sucks 38105 You deserved it 20405 88 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anon mom - United States - Manassas Today, my 9 year-old daughter had really bad constipation. When I took her to the doctor, he had to 'break it up' with a gloved finger, and then he sent me home with directions on how to administer an enema. I do not recommend trying to give an enema to a kid that doesn't want one. FML I agree, your life sucks 13636 You deserved it 953 50 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By PookaKay02 - United States Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML I agree, your life sucks 29944 You deserved it 8589 195 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 6/12/2020 22:02 - United Kingdom What a coinkydink Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his best friend. Who just so happened to be the guy who made my high school years a living hell. FML I agree, your life sucks 979 You deserved it 51 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bl3ur0z3 Today, I learned that my new apartment complex does not allow "altercations in community areas". This includes pulling my child out of the pool and reprimanding him for holding his cousin under water. I can't parent outside my apartment. FML I agree, your life sucks 2946 You deserved it 231 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML I agree, your life sucks 71720 You deserved it 6372 407 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By rainyday - United States Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I said that at least I was always there for him when he needed me. He said "When did I need you?" FML I agree, your life sucks 36945 You deserved it 6287 34 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I tried to discipline my two year old son. Whenever I do this, he starts pointing and imitating me, and I can't help but laugh. This explains why he never listens to me. FML I agree, your life sucks 10559 You deserved it 37695 127 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By alyssabree42 - United States - Estacada Today, I learned that when you hear a bump in the night, it's best not to check your parents' room. Some things cannot be unseen. FML I agree, your life sucks 17912 You deserved it 23115 138 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By parent Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML I agree, your life sucks 5125 You deserved it 2759 40 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By VoodooPriestess - 28/11/2020 14:02 What a catch Today, my boyfriend of 2 years responded to my opening up about how I felt like I was always put on the back burner, was to ghost me for a week, and break up via text. Don't worry though, we can still be friends and maybe later, when he's ready, start the relationship again. FML I agree, your life sucks 865 You deserved it 156 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By me - Canada Today, I attended an elderly man's funeral. As I approached the casket his wife said, "Thank you for coming." I replied with, "No, thank you." FML I agree, your life sucks 12000 You deserved it 30228 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Username - United States Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML I agree, your life sucks 64680 You deserved it 7871 531 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By matt - 12/3/2021 08:01 People disprove Today, I, a forty year-old man, went to the store with my teenage daughter and infant son. I got some very dirty looks. FML I agree, your life sucks 1026 You deserved it 91 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By RetailScapegoat Today, I was fired for job abandonment. Yesterday, my boss told me to go home early because we were so slow. After I reminded him, he laughed and said, "Oh yeah... You're still fired." FML I agree, your life sucks 4439 You deserved it 254 18 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Humble Today, on my first driving lesson, I crashed my instructor's car. I didn't even make it out of the parking lot. FML I agree, your life sucks 26160 You deserved it 11044 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ohyaknow - United States Communication Today, my boyfriend asked me if I have ever or would ever fake an orgasm. I assured him that I wouldn't, when he has actually never given me one. I didn't have the heart to tell him. FML I agree, your life sucks 12953 You deserved it 37423 171 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Angela - United States Today, I went to the doctor's office. People kept staring at me and I couldn't figure out why. Later, I realized my sister's puppies had chewed a noticeable hole in my pants' crotch. FML I agree, your life sucks 28464 You deserved it 5563 142 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out of nowhere a giant bug hit me in the face. I went into instant ninja mode, screaming and flailing. When I stopped, I realized it was just a leaf and everyone was staring at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 39004 You deserved it 17828 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Cat Ashes - United States - Dewitt Today, I received an unexpected package from my mother. It contained my cat's ashes. Apparently he died 3 weeks ago and she thought this was the best way to tell me. FML I agree, your life sucks 43677 You deserved it 2781 65 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By MafiaWarsWidow - Australia Today, I was on the phone to my boyfriend in England. I live in Australia. What did he talk about for 15 minutes straight? Mafia Wars on Facebook and how far he had got. FML I agree, your life sucks 27364 You deserved it 5456 90 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By genius_man16 | 0 #279518 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:23 BAHAHAHA You got owned by a kitten. YDI so much. Send a private message 604 10 Reply
By orangerocker26 | 0 #279520 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:24 why in the hell would you dutch oven your own cat. you deserved it. Send a private message 290 6 Reply
By simpsonman3000 | 0 #279517 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:23 Comment moderated for rule-breaking.. Show it anyway i hope theyre not all scratched up
Reply quade25 | 0 #2748842 - Friday 24 June 2011 12:50 what's there to scratch? Send a private message 32 2 Reply
Reply Muthalecka | 1 #3110480 - Monday 15 August 2011 5:20 #2 you hope? Do you care for this man's balls? Send a private message 36 2 Reply
Reply TheWildRover1 | 12 #5654205 - Monday 2 September 2013 1:55 I hope they are Send a private message 14 1 Reply
Reply m1k3_b0rr311 | 15 #6012470 - Saturday 19 July 2014 15:25 Yea i fucking do ae Send a private message 1 5 Reply
Reply rainbotato | 14 #6207390 - Friday 20 February 2015 3:55 are you retarded Send a private message 0 3 Reply
By genius_man16 | 0 #279518 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:23 BAHAHAHA You got owned by a kitten. YDI so much. Send a private message 604 10 Reply
Reply rawrlily | 0 #1039738 - Wednesday 23 June 2010 0:23 Aha. kittehz don't liek persunz wif a tinee dik. Espeshullee wen thei fart on mee. Send a private message 27 34 Reply
Reply zolltf | 4 #1099105 - Friday 16 July 2010 21:30 I'm still waiting for Perdix to tell some joke about him playing with his sister's pussy, and losing his balls in the process Send a private message 57 1 Reply
Reply Draeven_fml | 0 #1367998 - Wednesday 8 September 2010 5:32 that a whole new level of animal cruelty Send a private message 26 0 Reply
Reply maz_irken | 6 #2596010 - Wednesday 1 June 2011 0:39 feel lucky. it's probable the only time you'll get pu...errr...nevermind Send a private message 27 1 Reply
Reply Herropreez17 | 0 #2683095 - Wednesday 15 June 2011 2:03 Yea. WHAT DID THE POOR KITTY DO TO YOU???? Send a private message 10 4 Reply
Reply pink_raindrops | 26 #2911397 - Sunday 17 July 2011 6:37 I'm glad the kitty attacked your nuts. You thought it would be funny to see what his reaction would be, well you found out. Send a private message 28 2 Reply
Reply iammeorami | 25 #5357673 - Thursday 7 February 2013 4:08 awesome! Send a private message 0 0 Reply
Reply jarockstar27 | 10 #5404694 - Thursday 14 March 2013 6:29 And this dude wants our sympathy why??? Seriously deserved it! Send a private message 11 0 Reply
Reply Duggie1339 | 13 #5879137 - Saturday 8 March 2014 9:21 Okay based on my profile pic u can tell which side I'm on.... He/she is just a kitten, would u do that to a baby? You didn't deserve it... You deserve getting your balls chopped off and hung from your car mirror you sick fuck Send a private message 5 4 Reply
By MakeMeMoo | 0 #279519 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:23 What a moron...got what you deserved. Send a private message 163 11 Reply
Reply toaster468 | 0 #970710 - Monday 29 March 2010 21:59 you don't have testicles, you don't know what it feels like Send a private message 4 10 Reply
Reply lebronesque73091 | 12 #5147438 - Wednesday 14 November 2012 9:46 LOL, that's too funny. You deserve it for doing that though Send a private message 3 1 Reply
By orangerocker26 | 0 #279520 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:24 why in the hell would you dutch oven your own cat. you deserved it. Send a private message 290 6 Reply
Reply brookemurray17 | 5 #4782384 - Tuesday 7 August 2012 5:56 Omg I'm laughing so hard rn Send a private message 5 10 Reply
Reply kittykat1501 | 31 #6319628 - Saturday 13 June 2015 23:29 It's his sister's cat Send a private message 1 3 Reply
By nibas | 0 #279522 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:23 HAHA omg. owned. don't fuck with animals. Send a private message 145 4 Reply
Reply ifmlftw | 0 #853496 - Sunday 14 February 2010 2:20 somebody call PETA!!!!!!!! jk. PETA is a waste of time. but I do love animals Send a private message 11 15 Reply
Reply tencentsakiss | 19 #990777 - Tuesday 11 May 2010 8:12 it's amazing how many people on here do fuck with cats and get owned by getting their crotch attacked Send a private message 14 2 Reply
Reply TheCrazyAli28 | 1 #2721549 - Monday 20 June 2011 9:09 lol I wouldn't mind gettn my crotch attacked. Send a private message 2 11 Reply
Reply abnormalbird | 11 #5824830 - Sunday 12 January 2014 4:49 367 THEY KNOW OUR WEAKNESS Send a private message 1 1 Reply
By kelsey_LYNN | 0 #279525 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:24 Lmfao! Kitty ownage! YDI. Send a private message 46 3 Reply
By ZiggyMorrison | 0 #279529 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:24 Daaaaaaaayyyyyuuuuuumm hope you can still have kids Send a private message 15 76 Reply
Reply Picking_Kuppies | 0 #2101940 - Sunday 20 February 2011 0:55 Why, so they can all fart on kittens? Send a private message 85 2 Reply
Reply wildmonkey | 16 #5672540 - Saturday 14 September 2013 5:23 Idiots like that shouldn't have kids. Send a private message 12 2 Reply
Reply jacqleeen | 11 #6440526 - Wednesday 21 October 2015 5:01 Your comment just made me burst out laughing!! Send a private message 0 0 Reply
By CodeMonkey123 | 0 #279532 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:25 YDI, that you jerk Mittens the super ultra crime solving kitten doesn't take shit from anyone! Send a private message 19 28 Reply
Reply turtlemanz | 8 #2203294 - Saturday 19 March 2011 7:39 literally Send a private message 19 2 Reply
Reply Lqum26 | 0 #2390493 - Saturday 23 April 2011 2:39 8 you made absolutely no sense Send a private message 0 0 Reply
By DarkMirror | 0 #279543 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:26 karma xD But like it's such a bad thing? You probably shouldn't reproduce anyway. Send a private message 53 6 Reply
By lol_chickens | 0 #279544 - Sunday 7 June 2009 20:26 Why the hell would you put a kitten under the sheets? D: Anyhow, your balls must've looked all dangly and fun. Send a private message 76 3 Reply
Today, I'm in a relationship in which the sex was great and constant at the beginning. Now it’s so quick, bad and inconsistent, it’s like going at it with... I agree, your life sucks 433 You deserved it 70 1 Comments
Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to... I agree, your life sucks 816 You deserved it 64 8 Comments
You got owned by a kitten. YDI so much.