By AudraRose - 07/09/2011 16:57 - United States
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Have a mad orgy with a bunch of black guys right before your next appointment and watch her reaction
And even if your mother does not trust you, as it appears, I still stand by what I said. It would be much, MUCH worse to have a mother who refused you access to medical care because she wants you to stay a virgin. Make the most of the visit by asking about contraception, what the doctor recommends, where you can get it by yourself etc. It's a unique chance! And the doctor is sworn to secrecy.
67, no matter the age(unless they're like 5) the docter must keep it seceret.
I now have a palm-shaped welt on my forehead after having read your post. You fail at reading comprehension. She didn't say that being 15 and a virgin was punishment. She said that her mom forcing her to see the doc is the punishment. Also, she's not having any sex, so why are you preaching to her that she shouldn't be having it if she can't handle going to the doctor?
I don't understand why you got thumbs down! It is true! Com'on... if you are not ready to go to the doctor than you shouldnt even think about having sex... The OPs problem is as well that someone else see's her vagina! Well while having sex that might happen es well...just a hint! Besides the gyn sees so many vaginas all day I doubt he thinks it's anything unnatural.
No, the doctor's secrecy only starts when you are legally an adult. Up until then, they are sworn to secrecy yes, but that means they'll tell your parents only, and not other people. There's no way in hell a doctor is going to refuse disclosing information about an underage patient to their legal guardian!! The kid isn't legally in charge at that point, it's the legal guardian who takes all the heath care decision and hence is legally bound to be told whatever it is. The parents would sue doctors so fast it would be crazy. You might not know but doctors rather dislike being sued...
No, mokkikom (and others) stop pretending you know what you are talking about when you don't. Its enfuriating. In some states a doctor has the right to disclose medical information to a parent or guardian whereas in others a 'mature minor' has the right to confidentiality. I feel sorry for the OP, at least she cares but you can say no.
I think some of u r missing the big picture.. If she's a virgin, and the doctor sticks that pendulum into her, he may break her hymen. Her mother should know that. That's torture, and cruel, and I know from experience. Secondly, the doctor must keep ALL info about her private unless she has an STD or AIDS, then by law he has to tell her parents, because everyone that's come in contact with her needs to know.
Better safe than sorry, I guess? That does suck though, seeing as it's not necessary until you are sexually active. So that's a lot of discomfort for nothing. Your mom not trusting you is pretty rough, too. Sorry, OP!
OP, don't worry yourself too much. It's just for your own good in a way. Think of it like this though, although it's sort of different. A lot of guys at the same age as you get checked out by doctors too because testicular cancer is high in teenagers. So don't worry or feel embarrassed is what I'm trying to get at.
My stepmom almost forced me into one of these appointments. (shes a bitch) I didn't want to because I was 14 so I called the doctor. She said that I wouldn't need one until I'm 21 and that they've stopped doing this to younger girls because the results have come back bad but with further testing it showed that nothing was wrong. It doesn't matter if you're sexually active (at least up here) you just need to be over 20.
I disagree with anyone that disputes hyphenation of people. It's a description of ones culture and ethnic background. Just because you were born in and grew up in America doesn't prevent you from also being something else, as through the influence of your parents, other immigrants, etc., you still have your heritage from the place of your ancestors. You still likely had food native to the place of your ancestors. You still likely have a similar sense of what is and what isn't polite. with the people living in the place of your ancestors. I can go on and on. You people just don't understand probably because you all live in mainly homogenous communities.
Homogenous? Did you fucking wiki that first? Most of you are fuck sticks! Putting a hyphen doesn't make you a dual citizenship, and it doesn't give you heritage. Your either fucking Irish, Italian, African... etc... or American. While you may be American with one of these as a heritage, it is a made up word so the rest of us will think twice before lumping you into another category. Mam!!!! LMAO
@178, so let's say that I'm an immigrant from asia who's gotten his US citizenship, but mainly interact with other immigrants from asia who speak the same asian language in the asian parts of a city in america. Would I be American? Would I still be of the nation I immigrated from? If i WAS american, how can I be the same American that my neighbor might be, if his ancestors have lived here since colonial times, his ancestors fought in the American revolution, and his ancestors traveled the Oregon Trail? The heritage and the culture are way too different to simply lump us all together. No matter what country they live in, people call others of Jewish ancestry, Jews. So if they're Jews, why do they live in tons of countries besides Israel? What's really going on is the refusal of the new home country to accept these people as their own. P.S. what's wrong with the word homogenous?
I guess I should have been more clear. Sorry. Asia is a continent as well as Africa. If I were to cal you Asian you would be offended. Oh. And Jewish is a religion. Just like catholic or budist. I have no issue with the word, just the use of it so he/she sounds smarter. I technically have no issue with the hyphen, just how people that their families have lived here for generations all of a sudden start using it. And by the way if you are a citizen of the United States then you are American. If you want to keep the Asian title, then take your ass back to Asia where you fled from.
That sucks . Hope everything went fine . She was just looking out for u
Im also 15 and extremely uncomfortable with just taking my clothes off at check up's, so I can't imagine how hard it'll be to have a gyno appointment. Sorry about that :/
Girls get checked for hernias regularly too, ya know. It's not as invasive as when YOU have to turn your head and cough but there's some hand to pube contact goin' on. I'm having a hard time seeing, however, how your situation is as bad as having a speculum crank your vag wide open to put on display. I can testify it's not comfortable. Maybe we can chat again after you've had your first prostate exam. I think I could sympathize a little bit then. But just a little bit ;)
Wow I cannot believe there are men here saying their prostate exam is worse than our pap smears.... They stick a large cold speculum in there and crank us open then they scrape our insides and if you are lucky like me I had 2 biopsies on the same day in that position I got needles stuck up there and pieces of my cervix and uterus taken out with scissors and a tong
Amen 184! However, it can be uncomfortable (even hurt) for some women! It's a good idea to take 1 extra strength Advil/ Tylenol an hour before your appointment to reduce any discomfort. The good news is that if you've had 3 consecutive negative papsmears you only need to go in every 2-3 years instead of yearly :)
Wow You're lucky you're boyfriend has a degree In this medical field, my gf would be happy if I was a gyno specialist...... You fooken dumb beyotch grow a pair of hairy bawls and get checked out you hella nazty gaz mazk FUH-REAK @djee-pee....... Wtf name iz dat? What youse peein on, youses boyfrand
Well, that's why we're usually encouraged to use two different birth controls, like being on the pill, but also use a condom. I used a birth control implant in my arm, which lasts for 3 years and it's 99,9% secure, so if you get pregnant; it's Chuck Norris you're giving birth to. :
It is uncomfortable for the first time, but you know what is worse? When you realise you have cancer which could have been spotted way before. Or when you are getting sexual active and you are having an "accident" with 15... how do you imagine yourself with a baby... a baby which might cry all night?
If you go when you're ovulating, your cervix is relaxed and it's way more comfortable and 0 pain. Try not to go right after your period if you can. That's when your cervix is tight and it hurts a little. And where do they only do paps every 2-3 years after three consecutive negative ones? I've had to get one every year for the past 6 years and mine have all been normal. I'd assumed it was just a part of your annual physical since they always do it at mine.
#82 And? We have to get a giant plastic thing (bigger than most male genitalia) shoved up our hoo-ha (which HURTS, by the way, as we're not sexually aroused). And then they upon the giant thing up like tongs so it kind of thrusts against the vaginal walls painfully. Then they stick a giant q-tip up there.
It's not that bad having a pap it is a little uncomfortable. And yes they are super important, If I did not get them I would never have known about the cancerous cells on my cervix and in my uterus. Ladies Young and Old please get the paps yearly. I have never been told to come back every 2-3 years and I am now 27 and been getting paps since I was 16 and they were all normal up until April of this year. Please please please get them done, I would rather have that discomfort then to be faced with chemo and such. Do not say you are too young, My cousins thought the same thing, One died at 24 yes 24 from Uterine cancer and one died at 22 yes 22 from Breast cancer..Had they had their paps and breast exams yearly they may have been able to be saved. Get them done and if the dr. doesn't check your breasts at the pap as them to as they are suppose to just in case you have a lump or something. Never meant to scare you I think being honest is best though
#202, obviously you have either never had to have a biopsy or are just very delusional. pap smears are uncomfortable for most women, even though they are more than beneficial. as previous posters mentioned, take a couple pain relievers and put on the big girl pants cuz it could save your life
Well, you have to get one when your 18. But your moms way out of line doing that. I would refuse.
Still incorrect. Here's the actual guidelines from the people you're attempting to reference: "For women younger than 21 years who have never been sexually active, no routine pelvic examination, cervical cytology, or testing for sexually transmitted disease (STD) is needed. If the women have ever been sexually active, however, ACOG recommends cervical cytology be performed 3 years after the onset of sexual activity, and annually thereafter. Routine pelvic examination should be performed only when indicated by the patient's medical history." In short, you DO NOT HAVE TO GO to a gynecologist until you turn 21 (or 3 years after you start having sex), unless there is something wrong.
It's your body. You can whatever you please without your mom interfering. Many kids these days do start having sex as early as 15. Tell your mom to get that giant pole stuck up her ass, removed.
8. Are you serious? Some kids smoke and drink alcohol before they're 15 too but that doesn't mean the kids have the right to do that to their body and their parents shouldn't interfere. At 15 years of age she is below the age of consent in ANY US sate. This means she cannot legally have sex with anyone (with some legal exceptions in certain states). Really, if it is illegal for your parents to kick your pregnant ass out, then just listen to them, because they will end up having to clean up your mess.
Nothing wrong with having sex at 15-16, which is the age of consent in Scandinavia. It's such a shame seeing a lot of American people act so hysterical about it, and obviously implying that you need to be able to support a family of your own to have sex, even though it's enough being responsible to use protection. I'm glad sex isn't nearly viewed as a taboo here, and we teach the kids how to not get pregnant when we're around 10.
We just learn the basics at that age, then more information, condom school, watch really awkward sex ed videos and more when we're 14-15, at least in Norway. We also get completely free birth control pills when we're between 16 to 20 years old, and they can't tell our parents or anything, it has really helped and lowered the numbers of teen pregnancies here. :>
94 - The thing that's wrong with having sex before you're ready to support a family is that no protection, besides abstinence, is 100% effective. No matter what kind of protection you're using, be it a condom, the pill, or any other form, there is still A CHANCE of pregnancy. I agree that America needs to have more sex ed classes and sexual education in general. I think that not teaching kids about safe sex because you think it will "encourage them" to have sex is ridiculous. I think every kid should have mandatory sexual education. That is my personal opinion. However, any kid who has sex has a real chance of pregnancy, unless one or both is entirely infertile. That means the kids will be affecting the lives of not only themselves, but their entire families and the life of the child as well, if they choose to carry it to term and not have an abortion. The problem, in my opinion, is not the having sex part, it's having sex before you are mature enough to deal with the consequences. I realize that there's no magic "age" where someone becomes mature enough to deal with the consequences, but I have never in my life met a 15 year old kid who was ready to become a mommy/daddy.
109-- Well, not exactly... Lesbianism and homosexuality are just as good as abstinence in terms of pregnancy protection. And lesbians have lower rates of STDs than straight couples. And IIRC IUDs (sorry for all the abbreviations!) are 99.99% effective. And if you are super religious, then you might believe that abstinence is not 100% effective (you've got to account for those virgin births!) I mean, yes, it's better to wait until you can support yourself JUST IN CASE, but there are like five layers between you and having to raise a baby (condoms, the pill, plan B, abortion, adoption, etc...) If a fetus can survive all that you should consider keeping it because it's likely that you've just given birth to Superman.
58 Im sixteen now, when i was 15 over the summer in 2 mos i got a car and a job. Only the day of my birthday did i start driving and paying for my car. most of us have their parents pay for it. Im payingfor my car, and workingfor it. my friend got an audi. Hes obviously not paying and doesnt have a job. So what are u saying we are no where near supporting ourself?
44- age of consent only applies to a minor having sex with someone over 18... it isn't illegal for two 16 year olds to have sex no matter what the age of consent is. and to anyone who says teens today are more sexually active than previous generations, I'd like to point out previous generations got married younger than most of us do... and how many of those young couples stayed together...? hmm?
249, "the age of consent is the minimum age at which a person is considered to be legally competent to consent to sexual acts." this is even with parental consent. SOME states have an exception that kids below the age of consent can have intercourse as long as they are within a certain age difference, but that is only some and it the exception to main law. Oblivion, let's talk when half your paycheck goes to rent and you have to pay for diapers and baby formula. You'll get a kudos for managing then. But I agree with sex ed. And sex itself shouldn't be taboo as secrecy and lack of information can only lead to mistakes and rashes where there were no rashes before. There is a difference between educating yourself about sex from the start and getting lots of practice time when you're not young enough to cope with a potentially unwanted aftermath.
286, once again, there are plenty of layers between sex and having to raise a baby. And you're assuming that were Oblivion to get pregnant/get someone pregnant (which is already unlikely with contraception) that they would go through with the pregnancy and keep the baby. If you don't want to raise a baby, you can give it up for adoption, simple as that. Better for the baby, no need to drop out of school, and no reason for parents to complain about paying for/raising another child. But we went over this already, so... Last I checked, the age of consent in most places in the U.S. and Canada is 16 or 17 (some places have 18, but not most...) The OP is not so far below that. Hell, in some places in the U.S. the OP could probably get married with parental consent and a court order! That's far more disturbing than teens having sex, which has been happening for forever. And MOST places DO have that "extra clause" that excuses people with small age differences because if two 15 year olds have sex with each other, who do you accuse of statutory rape? (Don't say the boy-- that's sexist. And boys can be raped, too. Also, this situation rarely occurs between two people younger than 13 because, well, puberty.)
saks, re: oblivion I make no claim that oblivion wants to get knocked up/knock someone up. 58 stated 15 year-olds cant support themselves, let alone family. oblivion countered this by saying at the age of 15 she/he had a summer job and started making payments towards a car. Though it is a commendable feat for a 15 year old, in no universe is paying for a car equivalent to supporting yourself and a family.
Oh, and in addition. If two people under the age of consent do have sexual relations, they are BOTH guilty of having "unlawful sex". No one is sexist here. A good majority of those "extra clauses" just reduces the offense to a misdemeanor (as opposed to a felony), allows the guilty to not have to register as a sex offender, and reduces the penalty o fines/probation/community service.
You seem to have a fundamental misunderstanding of two things: 1. how age of consent laws work and 2. how state-based laws work. I'll address the 2nd one first. In the US, age of consent is a state-based law. That means there are 50 entirely separate laws concerning 50 different places. Some states may have the same law, but they are still separate and completely independent of one another. That means you CANNOT say "some states have exceptions to the general law," because there IS no general law. As for age of consent laws, almost every state makes it LEGAL for to people under the age of consent to have sex. Note that it is NOT, as you tried to say, a lesser charge. It is completely legal, same as if they were both of age. Now, I'm really only familiar with the law as it exists in my state, but if you're interested in comparing, you can look it up for any others. Where I live, age of consent is 16 and the age difference is 4, so a 15 year old and an 18 year old would be legal, a 15 year old and a 19 year old would not. Two 15 year olds would be legal. Two 13 year olds would be legal (as would a 13 year old and a 16 year old). That stops at 12, but I'm not sure what they do if two 10 year olds have sex with each other. Most likely they would investigate the families, since promiscuity at that age is normally the result of sexual abuse. I doubt they would actually punish the kids. My state is a bit more lenient than some, but I don't remember ever hearing about states trying two under-age people for having sex with each other. You couldn't anyway. They can't themselves be perpetrators of statutory rape because that would entail an of age person having sex with an under-age person. They would both be "victims," but with no one to be held accountable, there wouldn't really be anything you could do. That's not to say they couldn't try...people under 18 who have naked pictures of themselves can be charged with possession of child pornography. But it would be a lot harder to do with an act that by necessity involves two people and has no clear instigator.
Wow. If 2 people have sex, it's there business unless of course one party is way older. I seen somewhere in here (but can't find it now) an age of consent to be 16 in Canada. That is not right. Age of consent in Ontario, and I'm almost positive it's Canada wide is 14 years old! However, if you are under 16, you can not be with someone a day over 3 years older. If a 14 yr old was with a person who was say 3 years 1 day old it is statutory rape. Whether or not both parties consented. yet if your 16 you can be with a 40 year old. I do agree with staying well protected! The only thing that gets me, are many young kids being so immature and having multiple partners, not realizing the risk of STD's. And I'm not saying everyone is immature. I met a girl the other day who is 13 and has a 8 month old son. I disagree with that in so many ways. Sure she loves him, but she is missing out and will miss out on so many things and doesn't even realize it because she is so uneducated still. I lost my virginity at 14, to a guy I'd been with for 2 years. I'm now 21, and together we are married, have a 2 year old and own a house. I don't regret my life and I love my daughter, but I wish I would have waited. I think the longer you wait for sex the more you would appreciate it, not speaking from experience. Most girls I knew in high school who weren't virgins, were sluts. Because they had one thing on their mind, yet the girls who hadn't had sex weren't worried about it! I'm not being sexist, I just never talked sex with the boys, lol. All I'm saying is it is a decision everyone at some point in their life makes. I also think it has alot to do with how your raised. If you have strict parents you act out, behind their backs. If you have no rules, then you do it because you can... But if your in the middle, have an open relationship, can talk about anything, have rules but your parents are understanding your more opt to wait, bc you have nothing to prove. I know that I'm going to teach my daughter through out her life sex ed, so that she will just know, and not feel like she's being lectured. I'm going to be open with her and hope she can talk to me about things. She will have rules, but won't be chained down. And I hope it helps, I hope she understands not to have sex just to do it, but rather because you love someone and stuff.. I don't think parents are teaching there kids enough these days. Well in my town anyways, the kids run around like wild monsters and do what they want!
Tell your mom, now that you had something shoved up your vagina by a doctor, you're curious what a penis feels like.