By Mini-wanker - 18/10/2011 17:34 - United States

Spicy
Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks 57 547
You deserved it 8 867
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Top comments

Comments

indielove 13

Mini-wanker definitely defines OP.

51 5
SystemofaBlink41 27

You know what they say, it's the small things that matter...

50 4
ceilingfans 1

C C C COMBO BREAKER

chuymac 3

Lucky, you can say you did a Virgin twice. haha

210 4
MaCOOLiT 5

U shouldve ask her to get her butthole checked if it was still a virgin.

20 93
Caramelox 3

The awkward moment when you couldn't do it right the first time.

96 8
JoshTheMaggot 8

Are you the one that got Mary pregnant?

271 17
The_Troller 14

I guess OP came up short on this one

75 2
MattRoseen 12

62- You're a legend.

10 48
BaconDave 12

That is a good sign that you don't pleasure her enough. Oh, and 128, your shirt fell off

96 3
narf887 4

This is one or those situations where the girl says it it in yet guy replies baby I'm already done ;)

34 8
Jammy01jams 2

I'm going to guess that this is due to lack of cherry pop? Well in that case it's not uncommon to not pop the cherry the first time. I there is actually no physical evidence of a penis bein in there then that is so small that no amount of "it's how you use it that counts" will save you.

29 7
jacquay09 3

Yes. Just well done sir

2 10
Georgieeporgiee 9

You can pop your cherry dancing or horse riding... What kinda doctor did she go to?

16 12
Adman567 9

Hahaha 53 truer words hav never been spoken

2 8
v1kt4r 13

She was a virgin before she became a vampire, virgin for ever

4 20
KELSEYJOHNSON23 5

Who goes to the doctor just because they had sex for the first time anyway?

71 2
itsame0987 18

Glad I scrolled down 88.. I thought the same thing when I read this fml.. That does kinda suck op, but on a happy note this is now in my favorites.

0 5
haw008 14

37 that is way more than I ever wanted to know... This is FML not tell people how long it took to pop your cherry.

18 36
EvilPotato 14

57 this is an FML about having sex, and your flipping over someone talking about how long it took to pop someones cherry, in fact there was an FML about how someone kicked a girl in the crouch, and it popped her cherry, if you can't stand talking about sexuality then GTFO.

40 5
haw008 14

Your name should be hotpotato because you get so damn mad over the stupidest stuff!

3 41
EvilPotato 14

96 you annoy me, only stupid people annoy me, your name should be "iAngerPeople", I only do long comments for stupid people. And if you read your comment over you're saying your own comment is stupid. So STFU before I call KaySL to come beat your ass.

34 1
KiddNYC1O 20

Y I rich and u poor? >.

2 10
Valdrek 26

66- she wasn't speaking for the rest of us folk who very much wanted to hear more detail about your cherry popping saga. You now have the stage.

10 1
haw008 14

I'm sorry all I can do is laugh at this point. Back to more important things now. Oh and please add me to your most hated list. I'd love that :)

2 34
CleverBastard 8

Oh god she has such a huge head but nothing inside of it, it's like she got shot off of a stupid planet, hit a stupid tree, and hit every ******* branch on the way down.

13 1
EvilPotato 14

129 you've convinced me to add you to my shit list, see kids this is why you stay in school so you don't end up this this loser.

10 0
haw008 14

Too bad I'm in college, on the honor's list but you would only assume I wasn't because you are a stuck up prick going through a mid life crisis with nothing better to do than play on the Internet all day calling other people "losers" because you are one yourself and it makes you feel a little less unimportant. So I'm done with this conversation. But thank you for adding me!

0 17
haw008 14

And whoever has anime *cough* 168 as there picture. Definitely has never had sex.

3 9
horserider15 3

You should chill out she didnt go into horrid detail

1 0
haw008 14

Not mad just procrastinating. I really do not wanna read this book! And people that take things to seriously amuse me.

1 3
EvilPotato 14

166 are you on the honors list for extreme stupidity? Or are you just on your period? Or are you a bitch? I honestly don't know, you have me dumbfounded. Now stop commenting before I start raging.

6 0
Docbee 11

170, didn't you say you left a while ago? Now that I see you are still here, I fear for my health as your mental retardation is so immaculate(sp?) that it chokes the air and IQ around you. Do not bother calling me a "fail" as that is the level of your intelligent comebacks. I'll only politely respond with "so was your mom's abortion.":) Anime is awesome=P

3 0
CleverBastard 8

You said you were going to leave like 3 comments ago yet you keep arguing? When you act like a bitchy dumbass, just leave. Some people need to learn to not give a ****.

2 0
haw008 14

Kinda like you? I see you're still commenting.

1 1
_Oblivion_ 12

Bitch its like 50 to 1 against you. Quit bitching and quit being an immature brat. Your parents must have been reallllly stupid to send you to collage, because right now all we see is some prick trying to start shit and doesnt know when to stfu.

1 8
CleverBastard 8

My point exactly. I never said I was going to stop commenting and do "better things with my time" and bitch and moan about stupid shit. People like you give me no faith in humanity.

1 0
haw008 14

And you were obviously to stupid to get into college because you can't even spell it

1 0
EvilPotato 14

188 but he didn't say he would stop commenting, I don't know how you made it into college your IQ is PU, I could say plenty colorful words but would probably get moderated and banned, so I'll hold back, but you are clearly losing this thread war, so please leave...NOW.

0 0
_Oblivion_ 12

yeah I went at 16 graduated yesterday. You know backing up your shit really helps.

0 1
careless92 5

You know what they say about small penises........oh, nvm.

13 45
somerandomdude19 2

Challenge excepted

4 55
musicphreakk 0

TROLLOLOLOLOL... ;D

0 28
sarcasm17 10

Some guys just aren't big enough...

yellowstar808 6

Some girls just aren't pretty enough either

230 61
yellowstar808 6

Now she knows how op feels saying some guys aren't big enough

60 29
bannedforlife 0

Don't worry. You can work on getting your IQ above 60 and then maybe you'll be "smart enough."

66 21
yellowstar808 6

And who are u talking to?

32 45
number0 8

If your IQ were above 60, maybe you'd know...

86 6
J0gby 0

yellowstar is in denial about his own size...

7 40
LiveLaughFML 10

lol pretty sure yellowstar is a female

49 4
eaglesfootball 1

52 I'm sorry but that is the most random comment I have ever read

9 27
amayasoma 19

Pretty sure 52 was talking to 21.

6 2
bebohacker1 4

21- it's okay, I thought you had a funny point. If your gonna insult someone's "size" you'd think you'd be pretty enough to have seen one first... Ain't that right no.3?

13 4
DHoffmann 9

Meh, we could tell 3 was kidding around. He also used 1's profile pic meme which was pretty clever :)

1 1
yellowstar808 6

Nah I wasn't picking on anyone blondie I was just making a point on how someone can pick on someone who picked on someone else. U also proved my point. ;) I don't understand how some girls can insult a guys dick size when I'm pretty sure the girl has a flaw too. No one ain't perfect. ;)

10 10
ciscmowe 5

270 - Youre not making a point. you're just being a hypocrite by doing what 3 did.

8 5
Freeze_fml 16

She made a point. Not nicely, but the idea was conveyed regardless. As did the responses to her.

7 3
pablo1206 5

Ugly girls can still get dick though, guys tap anything that moves and have a hole

6 1
MommaMuff 6

"No one ain't perfect." Because that makes sense.

8 2
idontknowyou123 0

#21. Your grammar sucks. Go back to school. As for your post, id hit that (@#3), cause beauty is more than skin deep bitch

3 8
Daralea 21

Just be sure you have a big enough dick for her, 297.

3 1
mspeacock 6

And some girls don't rely on just their looks, they have that thing called "a personality". Who cares what she looks like, we all look gross when we're 80.

2 2
idontknowyou123 0

#315 I have a story about my penis. But its a long one...

1 2
himynameiskrista 0

Yellowstar- Bitches like you should stay in their little whorehouses & not be allowed to see the light of day. And at least that chick you were raggin' on isn't a fake lookin little **** like you.

0 0
caysters 12

I learned I was still physically a virgin after a year and a half with my ex... FYL dude.

psychobiker08 4

Sounds like hes got a needle dick! FHL

1 24
curlyfry33 8

Um...u have your profile picture of your baby...whatever physical virginty u had got violently ripped appart during the horrifing beauty of birth.

36 5
caysters 12

Baby is my nephew. lol

15 3
clumsylittleme 11

Why they hell are all the comments on this "D amn"...?

1 18
Biebz4Lyf10 0

haha everyone put thumbs down to every reply :L

0 26
yourlifeisbetter_fml 0

You never mentioned having sex with your ex...

4 3
PeypeyTheBeeotch 1

That's not what the baby in your picture says!!

1 11
cradle6 13

Your name is hilarious

187 5
Xx_Dakota_xX 1

OP that's when u sing "I just had sex"

32 4
Kennzz 0

But I doubt it felt good.

12 6
LiveLaughFML 10

at least a woman let him put his penis inside of her -__-/

34 1
VaanBasch 1

But you gotta wonder if it was truly "inside". Doesn't seem like it.

5 8
False_Stupidity 41

And OP's g/f can start singing 'like a virgin'

20 3
That0therguy 4

That never works, incase you haddnt noticed

39 3
That0therguy 4

That never works, incase you haddnt noticed

22 2
SystemofaBlink41 27

I didn't...

0 5
Decapitation 3

That just sounds like a small problem.

136 9
lovelylittleme 0

Cooooorrrrnnnyyyy.. Haha

1 12
ninjuh_wingman 29

Hey at least you got laid

103 6
Xx_Dakota_xX 1

75- lol "Just Had Sex" feat. Akon

5 16
LiveLaughFML 10

#89: I just had sexxxxx and it felt so good! a woman let me put my peeenis inside of her yeahh

5 17
FUUUandyourmom 16

I'd just like to point out that, at this current moment, you have 69 likes. That is all.

2 8