Health: Today, I was telling my mom that I was really nervous about going...

By taperjeangirl - 21/02/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I was telling my mom that I was really nervous about going to the gynecologist for the first time. Her response, "Oh don't worry, it's not like it's the first time you've spread your legs!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 766

You deserved it 10 556

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Same thing different taste

By trackgurl - 21/02/2009 02:37 - United States

Today, I went to get my blood drawn for the first time. After I explained to the nurse how nervous I was, she replied, "Oh honey, don't worry! This is my first time too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 737

You deserved it 2 992

By Anonymous - 09/04/2013 18:01 - United States

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 052

You deserved it 5 410

Sad but true

By mcginnismr - 13/05/2016 22:57

Today, I went to the doctor's office, where my mother happens to work. When my doctor tried to prank her by saying I have chlamydia, my mother laughed and said she didn't believe it, adding, "Have you even seen the way she interacts with boys?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 267

You deserved it 1 374

By Anonymous - 29/04/2013 16:51 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 780

You deserved it 13 333

Small talk fail

By notapervert - 28/02/2013 07:57 - United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 975

You deserved it 39 677

Relaxed

By Sorry, Doc - 10/09/2022 01:30

Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 224

By Anonymous - 18/06/2013 10:44 - United States

Today, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelled out "Relax" and "Enjoy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 065

You deserved it 4 081

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 06:04 - United States

Today, I had my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 350

You deserved it 21 996

By thanks mom ¬_¬ - 24/08/2013 22:05 - United States - Carlsbad

Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I was showing her the bedroom, when she looked into my opened sock drawer and said, "Using Durex, eh? Yeah, you were born 'cause a Trojan split." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 708

You deserved it 4 741

By UHM - 06/10/2013 21:54 - United States

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 276

You deserved it 4 018

d00d_c0m3_0n 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:10

That's a little mean O.o So it's kinda funny from someone else point of view. Although hopefully instead of being nervous, you were just annoyed at her. So at least she took your attention away from your nerves for a bit x]

Amkii 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:19

#3 - I love you!! But yeah your mom sounds a bit mean about it! So are you a virgin, though? I mean, if you're not, then, it wasn't such a mean comment for her to make.

Comments

d00d_c0m3_0n 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:10

Amkii 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:19

#3 - I love you!! But yeah your mom sounds a bit mean about it! So are you a virgin, though? I mean, if you're not, then, it wasn't such a mean comment for her to make.

KeenanQuinn 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:28

Mom FTW!

Tri_fml 5

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:30

Rofl #3 = win

crazycar 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 4:37

If you're not 18 yet, then the only reason to go the gyno is because u spread ur legs. So.... If u r then.....

audiophileMom 11

Wednesday 17 August 2011 11:56

That is such BS...

LordP123 0

Sunday 22 February 2009 9:41

Yeah...I don't believe this happened...like most of the FML's that involve parents saying things like this.

FriedChicken 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 5:40

#3, niceeee.

pandasrus87 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 1:27

#3 that's actually not funny at all... just because you have sex does not mean that having a procedure where the doctor swabs your cervix is not kind of frightening. So until you have to get that done, you shouldn't try to make smart@$$ comments about it.

daymann 0

Thursday 7 October 2010 19:54

douche with no life ^^

britannie 0

Sunday 9 January 2011 2:49

26, you're a douche with no life, not 18. Why can't she be nervous? Just because she's had sex doesn't mean she WANTS some creepy gyno stuffing their hands. up her vag. Dimmick.