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Hey guys OP here! Unfortunately I live in Texas and license plates are required on both front and back of vehicles :( He was driving illegally hence why he hit me and took off, the cop also said he was texting since I was parked whenever he hit my car, the trunk is dented in from the back and top is caved since he was driving a lifted SUV and I can no longer open it without causing further damage Thanks for the concern, i am fine ?

By Oli974 - 22/10/2015 13:08 - France - N?ves-parmelan

Today, it's job interview day. In the elevator on the way there, I overheard potential candidates talking about the boss of the company, mocking his alleged lack of credibility. Who's the boss? Me. They don't know that yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 599

You deserved it 67

Tasty snack ideas

By Stellarum - 18/08/2014 15:13 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I listened to a little girl explain how her scabs taste great with lemon juice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 653

You deserved it 4 232

Quandary

By Anonymous - 18/05/2022 12:00

Today, my nana died today of a heart attack in her sleep. I’ll never know if there was something I could have done, because while it was happening I was upstairs with a dildo, as it’s been a month since I had sex and I had the urge. I feel so selfish and ashamed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 603

You deserved it 302

By Username - 29/05/2019 12:15

Today, my brother announced his engagement. I'm going to be the Maid of Honor. My ex, who told me after five years of dating that he didn't believe in marriage, is going to be the Best Man. I get to walk down the aisle with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 019

You deserved it 172

By meegs - 17/10/2010 00:31 - Canada

Today, my sister asked me if she could go into my closet to borrow my favourite dress for a party she was going to tonight. When I asked her where she was going, she said to a Halloween costume party. My sister is going as a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 043

You deserved it 31 798

Make it so

By MissArizona - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my dad shaved his head. This wouldn't be so bad if he didn't expect me to address him as "Captain Picard" 24/7 now. He won't answer me otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 970

You deserved it 4 134

By Anonymous - 16/06/2012 00:00 - United States - Medina

Today, my son paid the price for emulating his idols, aka the sub-human scum on Jersey Shore. He called me from jail and actually had the balls to try to guilt me into bailing him out, after he'd been arrested for punching his girlfriend at a liquor store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 611

You deserved it 4 708

By Anonymous - 06/06/2019 14:00

Today, my ex said I had a lot in common with his new girlfriend. His new, grossly overweight, college drop-out, clinically depressed, constantly pot-smoking girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 717

You deserved it 407

Giggles McGee

By Shitmetalseller - 02/08/2014 22:37 - United Kingdom - Wilmslow

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 805

You deserved it 5 150

By Anonymous - 03/12/2016 09:54 - United States

Today, I've had so many family members die in the past 4 years, I now think of which pictures would look good at people's funerals when I look through photo albums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 981

You deserved it 668

By Anonymous - 11/06/2019 06:00

Today, I was picking up after my dog with a poo baggie over my hand, like a mitten. Too bad the bottom ripped open and my bare hand poked through it just as I grabbed a big handful of steaming dog turd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 876

You deserved it 306

By mackmackey - 18/05/2013 23:15 - United States - Phoenix

Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 758

You deserved it 3 920

mackmackey tells us more.

mackmackey 9

Monday 20 May 2013 5:28

hey OP here, thanks to many of you for suggesting a lawsuit, I'll consider it! Btw, it was at an urgent care and not a real hospital

By Terra - 19/11/2016 05:14

Today, I logged on Facebook and saw my friend who'd been engaged, then broke the engagement, then got back together announce their new wedding date: three days before my wedding. She also sent me a message asking if I'd move my date. We've been planning our wedding for two years. She got engaged six months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 547

You deserved it 810

By ohman - 02/10/2010 06:28 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because 'I look like his hamster when I'm eating sunflower seeds.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 622

You deserved it 5 864

By ezrocks4u - 20/09/2015 13:58 - United States - Charlotte

Today, the nicest present I received for my 18th birthday was a free razor in the mail. It was then stolen by my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 013

You deserved it 1 706

ezrocks4u tells us more.

ezrocks4u 29

Monday 21 September 2015 1:05

Hi, OP here. To give some context, I got a few t shirts for my birthday. My birthday was a month ago(thanks for the birthday wishes!) but only found out about the fact that my mom stole said razor a day ago, because I saw the package addressed to me in the trash. Needless to say, it is too late to steal back. I had posted another birthday FML(from the actual day of) never got posted. Got locked outside of my car in the rain for 3 hours, couldn't afford a locksmith, and missed my birthday dinner.

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 719

You deserved it 9 550

By Ugh - 13/09/2015 06:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that I moan too much when we have sex. I actually just fake my moans in an effort to cover the sound of my cracking hips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 432

You deserved it 5 919

By Bill Harrison - 19/07/2011 15:19 - United States

Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 457

You deserved it 6 751

By Anonymoose - 08/09/2015 19:12 - United States - West Long Branch

Today, I found out I wasn't cool enough to be invited to a college party that happened last night. The one in charge of inviting people was my girlfriend of two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 299

You deserved it 2 118

By Savviecat97 - 25/07/2019 00:01

Today, I finally got to see the results of the new timesheet I made to make things simpler for both the employees and the managers. Apparently, 75% of them don't know how to read. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 497

You deserved it 211

By unforgettablee - 29/04/2013 07:08 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 768

You deserved it 13 054

By Anonymous - 13/07/2011 13:31 - United States

Today, at a family reunion, my dad announced to everyone that I'd finally started my menstrual cycle. My grandmother started sobbing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 390

You deserved it 3 099

By Anonymous - 16/06/2014 16:33 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, my laziness reached an all-time high. I had a dream that I was at school and had spilled all the contents of my backpack onto the floor. I then purposely shook myself out of my sleep to avoid cleaning up the mess in my dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 721

You deserved it 11 012

By freylero - 27/10/2009 19:35 - United Kingdom

Today, my son's hamster died. It was overweight and got stuck in its plastic tube. My 6 year old son came downstairs to me smashing a plastic tube with a dead hamster in it on the kitchen table. He thinks I killed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 654

You deserved it 5 249

freylero tells us more.

freylero 5

Wednesday 28 October 2009 11:55

Basically, he's had hamsters that have dies before, and we always gave them a funeral... so I didn't want to bury him in a plastic tube so my husband gave me the job of removing the hamster....