Love, Gross, Insects and My ex: The Summoner

The Summoner

By Anonymous - 14/09/2020 05:02

Today, I've lived in my apartment for over 5 years with no bugs, as I'm phobic of them. I broke up with my ex, who smirked at me and declared war. I now have thousands of roaches that I can't get rid of. Coincidence? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 558

You deserved it 154

Love Gross Insects My ex

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Bugging out

By Ernest - 30/11/2022 06:00

Today, my girlfriend won't stay over at my apartment anymore. Why? Because she saw a few roaches. Pest control comes every week and I spray every other day, so there's only so much I can about it. The worst part is now it's extremely difficult to spend time together because she lives with her mom and sister, who argue nonstop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 247

By Anna Lete - 12/07/2017 21:31

Today, my apartment was flooded due to a broken pipe, which caused a huge family of cockroaches to disperse. Did you know they can fly? FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 918

You deserved it 328

Little *****

By Anonymous - 09/05/2022 06:00 - Australia

Today, and every other weekend for the past 4 weeks, my boyfriend has made the 2 and a half hour drive to come stay with me. For some reason, every time he comes down, we see 1 or 2 cockroaches in my house. I'm at home most of the time, and I never see any cockroaches. I swear they're conspiring to make me look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 038

You deserved it 152

By Stevski - 11/09/2012 15:08 - Australia - Port Macquarie

Today, after moving in with a couple of vegan zoologists a few weeks ago, I discover that they don't believe that we have the right to kill cockroaches, and will not allow me to do so. The house is infested, and it's spread to my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 246

You deserved it 4 009

Plagued

By Anonymous - 20/03/2022 12:00

Today, I just moved into my second apartment after the first one was infested with fruit flies, which were coming out of cracks in the floor. We discovered they had tried to cover this fact up so we'd move in. Guess what this new one has? Bed bugs. I asked if there was a history of bug problems and they said no. Lies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 216

You deserved it 97

By youngboob - 21/10/2014 15:42 - United States - Topeka

Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 201

You deserved it 3 685

By WhyGodWhy - 18/10/2016 06:33 - United States - Addison

Today, I spent the first night in my new home as a first-time homeowner. I was relaxing and enjoying the feeling of having my own space when I reached over to get my glasses and came back with a cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 654

You deserved it 804

Creepy crawlies

By Anonymous - 27/07/2020 17:01

Today, a friend of mine told me, after coming over to my house for years, that she has tiny "bugs" that are attached to her and follow her wherever she goes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 434

You deserved it 119

By creepycrawley247 - 01/05/2013 02:50 - United States - Ellington

Today, after being nearly homeless and couch-hopping for the last few months, I finally signed a 1-year lease. When I got home, I was surprised to see a picture of my new complex on the front page of the newspaper. It turns out that they are fighting a serious bedbug infestation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 268

You deserved it 3 807

My little friends

By Annonymous - 18/10/2012 14:41 - United States

Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 425

You deserved it 1 923

tounces7 27

Monday 14 September 2020 7:30

Rather depends on how much access he had to your apartment alone and/or if you had the locks changed after breaking up.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 14 September 2020 5:55

Yes. The roaches heard you were single and decided to make their move on you. They have lots of confidence considering how short they are. They might listen to Tom Cruise motivational tapes.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 14 September 2020 5:55

Yes. The roaches heard you were single and decided to make their move on you. They have lots of confidence considering how short they are. They might listen to Tom Cruise motivational tapes.

tounces7 27

Monday 14 September 2020 7:30

Rather depends on how much access he had to your apartment alone and/or if you had the locks changed after breaking up.

JasonThorn 19

Tuesday 15 September 2020 3:18

Go to Amazon for "Advion Syngenta Cockroach Gel Bait" and BUY IT. I had an infestation of roaches I brought from my apartment, got this stuff. Killed them all, haven't seen one since. You'll be sweeping up/vacuuming up dead roaches for a few days, but keep using it.

BurnInDemonFire 33

Tuesday 15 September 2020 3:36

Yes. She left, and your powers as an entomancer were awakened at the same time. By the way... what was your secret before the roaches came calling? Five years with no bugs? I get like a dozen creepy crawlies in my place as soon as I open a window.