By thxmom - 04/01/2015 17:25 - United States - West Jordan
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She certainly knows the difference. If OP has been in abusive relationships, it's because he didn't learn what a healthy relationship is from his parents, because they were assholes. His mom is still being an asshole by pretending not to know the difference, and telling everyone OP needs anger management.
Congratulations! Many victims of abuse are too afraid to seek help, and I'm proud of you for being so strong and courageous, OP. I completely agree with the above comments- your mother sounds as if she's extremely ignorant around that topic, and she certainly needs to be more empathetic. Try having a civil discussion with her about your past and the real reason you're attending therapy. of she doesn't understand or, for some reason, refuses to believe you, she's just an idiot. It can't be helped. Either way, though, there's nothing wrong with anger management, so I doubt people see you in a different light now. You could always explain to them what you really have a therapist for, too.
Her generation has nothing to do with it, neither does being 'set in her ways'. If her daughter is not in anger management, she shouldn't be telling people that she is. It's common sense. No matter what she thinks of the therapy she can't just go round lying about her daughter because it's 'easier for her to understand'. We have plenty of information, OP's mom is a clueless idiot.
29, there's a possibility that the mother just doesn't understand what op is really there for and that she isn't intentionally lying to people or making fun/little of Op's experience. She just may not actually know or understand what's going on. As oppose to just getting angry, I would try and sit down and explain to my mom what happened in my past relationships and why I now need therapy and what for. Now if op's mom still doesn't understand or refuses to believe op then she's either really dumb or just rude and set in her stupid ways and beliefs.
20 isn't wrong either. There's a possibility, as stupid as it is, that theres a generation thing going on as well, maybe the mother still believes that husband is "head of the household" and that its ok for the husband to be in charge and "discipline" the wife if needed. There are many in the past that did think this way. It's not right but it doesn't mean 20 is wrong.
Someone as clueless as the OP's mother probably won't understand an explanation. "Stop saying I'm in anger management and I'll stop telling people you have herpes!" is much more direct. I'm not saying that's a good starting point, but if explanations don't go anywhere sometimes you need to be more direct.
Sorry, OP, that's really hurtful. Sit her down and talk to her about her ignorance.
the abusive ones. reading is hard buddy. i get that