Animals

This one's mine! Kind of weird to see it here. Anyway, the vet did several (pricey) tests to find out why my dog drinks so much and pees everywhere. The title pretty much nailed it, he's an asshole.

Cynophobia

By Anonymous - 01/08/2021 04:01

Today, my new boyfriend is so scared of dogs that he won’t even go in the room where my new puppy's bed is, so even on the days when he’s at home not working, I still have to pay the lad next door to come round and let it into the garden for a pee, because he’s too scared to open the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 572

You deserved it 922

Thanks little buddy

By crushed - 10/03/2021 14:00

Today, I was in the middle of my workout when my cat meowed so loudly, it startled me into dropping a 50-pound weight onto my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 869

You deserved it 292

By Cat’s dildo - 29/11/2018 02:53

Today, I realized after I wrapped myself in a blanket that it was my cat's "humping blanket". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 110

You deserved it 781

Alaina Heuerman tells us more.

Alaina Heuerman 20

Thursday 22 November 2018 14:46

Alright I didn’t really wanna follow up but I need to clarify. HE IS NEUTERED he has been since we got him. Also that was my blanket but it very recently became humping blanket 2. Let’s just say he really likes soft fluffy blankets. So all of mine... (yes that’s him in my profile pic btw)

Cats are like drugs

By Anonymous - 22/05/2021 23:01 - Turkey - Adana

Today, I'd agreed to watch my friend's cats for a few weeks. I'd always promised myself not to become a "crazy cat lady" like her. It's the third day and I danced with the cats and apologised to them for my bad dancing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 808

You deserved it 518

Bye bye Bambi

By Anonymous - 24/05/2021 19:59

Today, I hit two deer at the same time on my way to work around 50 mph. They jumped out of the bushes last minute, leaving me zero time to react. I waited a full year to get this truck, shopped around to get what I wanted, and it's my "dream truck". I've only had it for two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 063

You deserved it 140

By ilovechickens - 15/04/2012 03:46 - United States

Today, I tried to be kind to animals and get my dad to buy cage-free eggs. When I told him it was dollar more, he started yelling and making a scene in the middle of the store, saying that chickens are ugly and they deserve to suffer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 810

You deserved it 6 557

By gabimk23 - 23/03/2016 13:54 - United States - Bethlehem

Today, my dog hates my neighbor so much, she forms a shit barrier in their yard to keep them away from my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 251

You deserved it 1 884

gabimk23 tells us more.

gabimk23 13

Thursday 24 March 2016 4:03

Well, it all started a couple months ago when the girl was living with a different man, they blasted music at 3 am and would tempt my dog with treats. One day I came home and there was a bunch of police cars in front of the house, apparently they were cooking meth and they got arrested. When she got bailed out 3 months later she moved in that house with another man, and ever since my dog goes outside barks at the house, and ***** in their yard. She hates them so much she tries to bark at them if she just sees them in the window. Maybe they gave her a bad treat idk.

Batman

By Anonymous - 05/10/2021 23:00

Today, at work, someone found a bat indoors. I offered my help. They shouted, "Let someone with the right expertise do it." I volunteer as a bat carer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 137

First step

By It_gets_better - 16/07/2021 08:11

Today, I finally got my first job offer in my desired career field at the city animal shelter. I have a bachelor's degree in Animal Science, two minors, and I graduated with honors. The job I was offered? Cleaning kennels, part-time, on weekends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 597

You deserved it 330

It_gets_better tells us more.

It_gets_better 19

Thursday 15 July 2021 4:40

OP here. I realize no matter where I go I'd start at an entry-level job; but even most entry level jobs that require a degree would pay the bills for my family. My biggest disappointment is that I was only offered a barely above minimum wage, part-time job, after a three-month application process. I spent hours watching recorded meetings and looking over the shelter's statistics and brainstorming improvements to present at my interview (because I applied for an entry-level desk job) so it felt like a slap in the face to spend so much time and energy on this only to be hit with, as kfchicken correctly pointed out, a job any able-bodied person could do- and only part time! (I know they had full time positions available, so I'm wracking my brain about who could possibly have been chosen over me.)

Cujo, but for cats

By Anonymous - 25/03/2021 08:01

Today, my cat was incessantly meowing trying to get me to wake up and feed him. Because it was 6 a.m., and I'd hardly slept at all last night, my brain decided that the best solution to get him to shut up would be to hug him. The result was a normally docile and lazy cat giving me a nasty scratch next to my left eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 307

By PityKitty - 24/12/2013 16:53

Today, I pretended to cry in front of my cat because she doesn't cuddle with me anymore. Yeah, I tried to guilt-trip my cat into loving me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 149

You deserved it 12 310

By cheekychimp23 - 24/07/2013 12:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to help my constipated dog by squeezing crap out of her butt. This is a daily occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 183

You deserved it 6 109

cheekychimp23 tells us more.

cheekychimp23 6

Wednesday 24 July 2013 20:07

Just so people know I'm not a terrible dog owner - we have been to the vet numerous times and they told me it happens because her tail was docked too short when she was a puppy! I feed her oil but sadly it does not help. Sigh. Keep squeezing I guess. FML.