Animals

Okay, maybe break the piano was a bit of a drastic solution. It's really heavy and my dad got it as a gift from one of his patients, so I'm not really familiar with the thing. It's really old and out of tune, we do get it tuned once in a while, but it doesn't make any difference. We are trying to find someone who's interested in it, since we don't use it anymore, and for that reason we had placed the piano in a side part of the house. I'm a responsible cat owner and I know that when you get a new cat you have to let it get used to your house room by room. Unfortunately for us, it was the piano room... I still have no idea how she got in, since the piano is a really massive thing, no holes or stuff like that. We had to take of the front (which also happens when it gets tuned) to get her out, but she was completely fine and so was the piano, so, that turned out all right :) For those of you who were asking if I bought or adopted the cat, I meant bought. I really think adopting is better! But this cat species is hypo-allergic, and since my dad is allergic to cats, this was the only way we could get one. I've wanted a cat for whole my life and after 16 years, my dream came true, and everyone here loves our little kitty :) I laughed at all your musical kitty jokes, and thanks for all the advice! Happy holidays xxx

Clumsy nitwit

By Anonymous - 04/05/2018 01:30

Today, while dropping files off at my boss's house, I tripped and fell into his fish tank. We both watched as a crack spread all the way across the glass and shattered, covering his carpet in fish and water. His only words to me were, "I'll see you at work tomorrow. Maybe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 472

You deserved it 635

I think you should leave

By Anonymous - 31/07/2026 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I warned my new boyfriend not to approach my ferret, as he is still quite young and bites when he plays. He ignored me completely because “animals love him”, and when my ferret latched onto his finger, he threw him across the room. Now I can’t find him anywhere in the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 461

You deserved it 92

By GabisayzRAWR - 21/03/2012 16:03 - United States - O Fallon

Today, I was out with my dog, who loves to bury things. He had recently torn apart his toy and buried it in the sand. I saw a piece of it sticking out of the ground, so I picked it up. It turns out that I was not holding his toy, but rather a dead bat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 387

You deserved it 2 786

GabisayzRAWR tells us more.

GabisayzRAWR 0

Thursday 22 March 2012 2:52

Thank you :D we checked my dog and he was ok :)

By anonymous - 17/07/2013 04:48 - United States - Katy

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 683

You deserved it 7 409

Such a rush

By lukey101 - 31/08/2024 16:00 - Australia

Today, I checked my Ring cameras while at work. Ridiculously, my overweight pug-dog managed to climb up onto the ironing board and seemingly couldn’t get down. I valiantly rushed home to rescue, only for him to immediately jump down unassisted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 446

By StefanKa - 09/09/2013 09:30 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, I learned that my parrots now can shit horizontally when I found the wall next to the cage covered in feces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 629

You deserved it 3 902

StefanKa tells us more.

StefanKa 23

Monday 9 September 2013 19:32

OP here, I know that and I let them out all the time but I just didnt expect to find shit between the wall and the cage, where none of them can enter.

By Anonymous - 10/10/2010 04:29 - United States

Today, I swerved to miss hitting a kitten, over-corrected, hit and killed the cat, and totaled my truck by hitting a parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 517

You deserved it 13 908

My new friends

By Anonymous - 15/08/2021 18:01 - Germany - Dresden

Today, on a camping trip, where it’s raining, I'm suddenly popular. With whom? With slugs! I found one in my shoe, one in my bag, two in my cooking pot and the last one I grabbed – surprise! - on the backside of my coffee mug, which was inside the bag, on the bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 111

By d0pey - 20/02/2009 22:02 - United States

Today, I realized that there are more framed pictures of my mom's dog than pictures of me around the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 899

You deserved it 3 457

By Kate - 23/12/2012 08:24 - United States - Kansas City

Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 003

You deserved it 8 991

Supply and demand

By Anonymous - 24/10/2020 20:02 - Canada - Courtenay

Today, I spotted my dad watching a wildlife/nature video. I pointed out to him that the animal on the screen was critically endangered; he rebutted by telling me that it's impossible for the animal on the screen to go extinct because people keep hunting it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 938

You deserved it 117

The master of the house

By Damn cats - 13/10/2022 04:00

Today, I had to use the bathroom when I woke up this morning. My cat was sitting in front of the toilet and absolutely refused to move. I seriously tried every humane way of getting her to move, but she didn't budge. I had to sit really awkwardly on the toilet to do my business. When I stood up, she moved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 2 008

By that_culinary_degree_though - 13/05/2014 02:46 - United States - Auburn

Today, my mom invited me over yet again so I could practice my culinary degree by making an exquisite, gourmet meal for her dog; a three year old Pomeranian who pees in my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 394

You deserved it 5 143

Good boy

By Chyna - 04/12/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I got locked out of my car while the engine was idling. The "good news"? My dog inside the car thought this was the funniest thing ever and barked happily every time I tried to open it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 258

By alexbrooke - 16/09/2013 02:49 - United States - Paintsville

Today, as I started my car, I heard the most horrific sounds coming from the engine. When I lifted the hood I realized I'd found my son's cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 586

You deserved it 4 593

alexbrooke tells us more.

alexbrooke 14

Tuesday 17 September 2013 0:25

Hey! OP here! the cat actually was wrapped around the Serpentine belt! No.it did not survive, and my car is in the shop, being cleaned out with a new belt. Sad thing my son was in the car, he kept saying Mommy! what is it?! The cat has been lost, I actually hadn't drove my car for a couple of days so I'm not sure how long it was actually in there. I am surprised how.many people this has happened to, glad it wasnt just me!

By ChaoticGamer - 23/12/2015 15:15 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up to a horrible smell only to realize that my dog had peed all over my leg cast during the night. I can't get another one because the closest doctors are all on Christmas vacation. Guess this is an early Christmas present from my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 832

You deserved it 1 918

By agent_awesome - 21/09/2011 15:25 - United Kingdom

Today, a fly got stuck up my nose while I was giving a speech. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 668

You deserved it 2 627

agent_awesome tells us more.

agent_awesome 10

Wednesday 21 September 2011 23:36

i popped it out by holding down the other nostril and blowing.it was awkward. but atleast i gave the people a story to tell. one day when its not so fresh i will look back and laugh...i hope