Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was supposed to take a test, but the professor didn't have it ready because he went to a concert last night. I sold my own tickets to that very concert in order to study for the test. FML

#12411757
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42595) - you deserved it (4449)

On 08/09/2010 at 1:44pm - misc - by goodstudent (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in the car with my parents' friends. I was in the back with my window down when I felt something strange hit my ear. I then realized that the person sitting in front of me was picking their scab and throwing it out the window. FML

#12411056
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30119) - you deserved it (2512)

On 08/09/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Scabs (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, the sprinklers in the hotel room came on and stayed on. There was no fire. My family is currently living in the hotel, so everything we own is soaked. FML

#12410355
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30097) - you deserved it (2774)

On 08/09/2010 at 12:08pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML

#12409274
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41366) - you deserved it (27825)

On 08/09/2010 at 10:38am - love - by Forgotten (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML

#12408550
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45035) - you deserved it (14310)

On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Mikey832 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML

#12408546
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13606) - you deserved it (52501)

On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I misspelled the word "failure" in front of all my co-workers. Now I'm not given any writing tasks. FML

#12406299
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9077) - you deserved it (31270)

On 08/09/2010 at 4:29am - work - by Fml24609 - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the grocery store and this hot guy was staring at my ass, so I smiled at him. My mother noticed he was checking my ass out, and she approached him and said "I know she has a big ass, but it's rude to stare, son." FML

#12405087
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43676) - you deserved it (5435)

On 08/09/2010 at 3:07am - intimacy - by hard - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I couldn't fall asleep till 3am and was woken approximately every hour or so. Why? I found out my new upstairs neighbors have a very active love life. She's a screamer. FML

#12404191
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36244) - you deserved it (3159)

On 08/09/2010 at 2:18am - intimacy - by SleeplessInSoCal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my father I registered for the Marines, and that I'm leaving for bootcamp next week. He asked if this means that he doesn't have to pay child support anymore. FML

#12401273
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31671) - you deserved it (3376)

On 08/09/2010 at 12:03am - misc - by Widowmaker - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML

#12396014
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36118) - you deserved it (3663)

On 08/08/2010 at 7:27pm - animals - by L.Lime05 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my "secret admirer" I've been exchanging letters with for the last three months, and even started developing feelings for, is actually my ex best friend trying to pull a prank on me. FML

#12392564
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37058) - you deserved it (6622)

On 08/08/2010 at 3:38pm - love - by pixiegirl (woman) - United States

Today, my cat died. But, before he could bite the dust, he left a goodbye present on my bed: a decapitated baby rabbit. FML

#12390101
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32189) - you deserved it (4301)

On 08/08/2010 at 12:22pm - animals - by Lifes_a_bust (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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