Today, I came to the conclusion that you should always tell the truth. While I was busy reassuring her that the condom didn't break, she was telling me how it was okay because she was on the pill. According to the pregnancy test, we both lied. FML
by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 12:52am / United States / Intimacy
by Zmeilerr / 01/15/2011 at 12:38am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
letsgetouttahere's comment : It's probably cause you're one of those people who posts a status like this everyday..
by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 12:15am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by inchetogb / 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm / United States (Kentucky) / Animals
by Gabriel A / 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
ridder215's comment : Ew.
Today, I mailed out a college application that is going to another country. I paid $250 for the application and $11 for shipping. I just realized that I forgot to sign the bottom of the application. FML
by Anonymous / 01/14/2011 at 8:05pm / United States (California) / Money
Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML
by Anonymous / 01/14/2011 at 6:07pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/14/2011 at 3:53pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I clocked into work completely exhausted despite having gone to bed early. My roommates stayed up until 4am watching a movie, blasting music, and constantly giggling like madwomen. This is their "new and improved" schedule. FML
by hoops / 01/14/2011 at 3:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a rude awakening after a traffic accident the day before. I'd fled the scene to avoid having to pay hefty damage fines. I would have gotten away with it too, if my license plate hadn't fallen off and incriminated me. FML
by calidumbass / 01/14/2011 at 2:43pm / United States / Money
jibz's comment : YDI 100 times over OP, never hit and run. man up and own up to your mistakes or stay off the roads.
Today, after staying up all night at my friend's house, I woke up to something I couldn't identify on my cheek, so I slapped it away. When I heard crying, I opened my eyes and realized it was my friend's three year old sister who was trying to be sweet by kissing me on the cheek. FML
by ash / 01/14/2011 at 1:22pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, a friend asked me to come with her to the art building at school, so I could pose in the stance of a figure she was drawing for her exam. I obliged and sat for the pose. When the art teacher walked by she looked at me, then at the sketch, pointed to the legs and said, "make them fatter". FML
by humiliated / 01/14/2011 at 11:28am / United Kingdom (East Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous