All the FMLs

By Tomtom - 17/11/2008 05:04 - France

Today, I put on the same jeans that I had left in a bundle in my bedroom the day before. A few hours later, my boxer shorts decided to make their spectacular reappearance trick at the bottom of my leg in the middle of one of my meetings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 101

You deserved it 11 623

By Pepe - 16/11/2008 05:54 - France

Today, my girlfriend said to me, "You know, you only have to wash 3 times a week to be clean." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 555

You deserved it 7 846

By mimo - 14/11/2008 04:16 - France

Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 501

You deserved it 5 008

By Anonymous - 13/11/2008 08:42 - France

Today, my boss said to me: 'You know, our competitors are also hiring!' FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 342

You deserved it 3 055

By syle - 13/11/2008 06:51 - France

Today, my son forgot to log out of MSN. He had written, "When am I getting out of this place?" and his username was "mother fucker". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 838

You deserved it 7 649

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 255

You deserved it 2 339

The pirate look

By Anonymous - 13/11/2008 03:01 - France

Today, I scratched my cornea and have to wear a large bandage covering my eye. I'm off today, but I'll probably have to wear it to school tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 074

You deserved it 5 979

Ally

By Anonyme - 13/11/2008 02:46 - France

Today, I'm still in love with my ex-boyfriend, who is going out with someone else now. At least I now know that he's gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 673

You deserved it 4 373

By Anonymous - 12/11/2008 08:10 - France

Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 960

You deserved it 11 425

By bipbip - 12/11/2008 07:53 - France

Today, at work, I received an email telling me that viewing porn websites was prohibited and was a good enough reason to fire me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 348

You deserved it 68 855

Awkward

By Lio - 12/11/2008 05:25 - France

Today, thinking I was being very generous, I lent my jacket to a new co-worker. I guess I should have checked my pockets before I did, I’m not sure that leaving 3 different flavors of condoms in them made a good impression. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 084

You deserved it 41 859

By Blazouta - 11/11/2008 08:32 - France

Today, I'm 20 and I'm going bald. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 083

You deserved it 4 582

By Daddy - 10/11/2008 12:06 - France

Today, I gave my son a bollocking for losing a very important paper that I needed for work. I've just found it in my right pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 474

You deserved it 59 725

By lamponau - 09/11/2008 11:26 - France

Today, my 6-year-old son said to me, "You smell nice daddy." Surprised but flattered, I thanked him. He then added, "I like the smell of cheese!'" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 541

You deserved it 6 183

By Noname - 09/11/2008 09:18 - France

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep, poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 703

You deserved it 13 860

By Kat - 08/11/2008 07:51 - France

Today, everyone thought that I was the one who farted in the lift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 438

You deserved it 5 233

By choup - 07/11/2008 21:02 - Australia

Today, I went to have a drink with my friend. On the way I withdrew 20 bucks and when I arrived at the bar I realised I had taken my credit card but not the banknote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 204

You deserved it 27 598

By Ulysse - 07/11/2008 15:33 - United Kingdom

Today, on my first day at a new job, my boss asked how old I was. I replied, "Eighteen." She responded that she was my age thirty years ago, which makes her the same age as my mum. When I told her, she gave me a puzzled look, so I repeated myself. She was my age thirteen years ago, not thirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 288

You deserved it 14 391

By Mandoune - 07/11/2008 14:18 - Finland

Today, I dropped my keys in the drain. Thankfully, my new flat mate generously offered his help to reach the keys via flower pot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 339

You deserved it 4 587

By Tom - 07/11/2008 12:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I crawled into bed at 2 in the morning. At 6 am, the telephone rang, waking me up. It was a wrong number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 919

You deserved it 13 362

By JoLaFritte - 07/11/2008 10:10 - France

Today, thinking that I was alone at work, I started rummaging through my nose, trying to find something interesting. It was only after about a minute that I noticed that my boss was looking straight at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 957

You deserved it 50 464

By Choum - 07/11/2008 06:33 - France

Today, I realized that my ex has REALLY dumped me for a video game. And he will not change his mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 240

You deserved it 6 043

By alice5000 - 07/11/2008 05:47 - France

Today, during a never-ending dinner with really boring friends, I faked being tired and told my husband, "Let’s go honey, we have a long way to drive home." He looks at me and says, "Well… we are at home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 472

You deserved it 70 270

By frog - 06/11/2008 13:01 - United Kingdom

Today, while on holiday in England, a cute boy came up and asked where I'm from. When I said Paris, he gave a look and said, "Oh, strange, I always thought Parisians were the most beautiful women in the world." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 379

You deserved it 4 559

By Yohm - 06/11/2008 09:41 - France

Today, I’m starting my 28th year with 28 cents on my bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 552

You deserved it 12 788

By Rolax - 06/11/2008 09:38 - France

Today, my boyfriend came up with this thrillingly romantic proposal: “I’m paying way too much income tax. How about we get married?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 438

You deserved it 6 057

By Fsd - 05/11/2008 07:35 - France

Today, I'm on holiday, but my alarm clock isn't. It rang at 6 o'clock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 361

You deserved it 47 090

By clubber - 04/11/2008 04:16 - Switzerland

Today, I was in a nightclub with my girlfriend when a beautiful woman looked at me in the most provocative way. I didn't want to upset my girlfriend, so I escaped to the bar. When I came back, I saw the same girl making out with my girlfriend. Maybe I wasn't the one she was looking at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 345

You deserved it 9 048

By steph - 31/10/2008 07:11 - France

Today, my ex-girlfriend told me that she can't live without me, but she has another boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 243

You deserved it 4 138

By Tara - 31/10/2008 07:06 - Sweden

Today, I babysat a four year-old kid, so his parents could go out to party. Once in bed, he yelled, "I want to go party!" After three or four times, I told him to go to sleep. Two hours later, he'd wet the bed, saying, "I told you I want to go potty!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 000

You deserved it 52 329

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I visited my friend in a nasty part of town. When I saw the shattered window of the car next to me, and the missing stereo, I moved my car to a safer location. Luckily, though, I have a common car, so the thieves were able to jimmy the lock and steal my stereo without making any noise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 759

You deserved it 3 229

Today, I'm realizing the woman I've been in love with for 8 years has become completely disinterested in me. I can't even connect on a basic, "How was your day?" level without her her zoning out or getting lost in her phone, only to apologize when I say something and then not even ask what I had to say. We have 2 kids now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 186

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 023

You deserved it 5 350

Today, I went to my favorite bar after work for a drink. On my way to the porch out back, I didn't realize the sliding glass door was shut, and walked straight into it. I was stone cold sober, but the bartender refused to believe me, and cut me off before my first beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 488

You deserved it 4 447

Today, two girls who are in my class tried to talk to me about each other, not knowing the other had already spoken to me. They are best friends, but also hate each other, and seem to have taken me as the one to shit talk to about each other constantly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 87

Today, I got food poisoning. After leaving class 4 times to poop, I sharted in the school bus on the ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 555

You deserved it 211