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Just a quick update from the OP: this isn't the first threat my mother gave me about this. She actually influenced my sister to have the same stance. Me and my sister worked it out, but my mom crossed the line. She brings this up when it benefits her ulterior motive to reunite the family (ain't mad at her for that), but it shouldn't be brought up while we're announcing our engagement, or introducing both families for the first time, or a casual conversation months later about us getting on the same insurance. The saddest part is... Me and the missus were planning on having only our closest immediate family. It was going to be around 10 total people. I told her she doesn't have to worry anymore: no need for them to go. Not even bitter. I just want to keep the focus on the happy couple and not use our day as a family counseling session.

By Zoo - 07/05/2019 14:00

Today, I went to therapy. Previously, I had been given the task to write a list of things I hate about myself so my doctor could see what we needed to work on. I gave her the list, and she simply said, "Wow, I've never had someone give me such a long list." I had 55 items on the list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 849

You deserved it 282

Slippery

By Estranged Fiance - 26/12/2016 05:49 - United States

Today, my fiancé got impatient and passed a lady doing 15 mph under the speed limit. The lady was driving slowly in case the black ice in the other lane was in both. We spun out and drove right into a guard rail. I'd just filled the tank, so now I'm down $40 and need to pay for a rental too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 819

You deserved it 3 325

Take the hints

By Unwanted - 03/11/2015 19:10 - Austria

Today, my boyfriend declared he doesn't feel ready to move in with me for at least "some more years". We have already been together for five years. When he bought an apartment one year ago, he kept it a secret for three months. Maybe I should learn to take a hint. Or several hints. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 930

You deserved it 4 693

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 06:00

Today, I came home from work and found my sister using my vibrator in my own bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 913

You deserved it 250

By anonymous - 02/11/2015 03:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 350

You deserved it 7 541

By deathbysnoosnoo - 24/11/2009 21:42 - United States

Today, while showing my art work at a festival, a very old cougar walked up to me and asked if I wanted to hook up later. After refusing more than one time, the woman walked away with my business card. I've been getting emails with naked pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 944

You deserved it 5 601

By Stevie - 17/12/2016 03:15 - United States - Southfield

Today, I kindly explained to a client that she had calculated her CD interest wrong. She kindly responded that, as a nurse, she would never give me medical treatment if I was involved in a car accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 581

You deserved it 629

Wakey wakey

By Tanya - 30/05/2019 11:26

Today, I found shit smeared into the carpet and I wasn’t sure who to blame, the dog, the newborn baby or the 60-year-old alcoholic mother-in-law whose husband had finally thrown her out. I did eventually find her passed out drunk in my flower bed with shit all down her legs though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 417

You deserved it 157

By sunflowers2k - 10/12/2016 03:27 - Canada - Fort Mcmurray

Today, like most weekends, I got swindled into being the designated driver for our group. Too bad this weekend was my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 225

You deserved it 1 469

sunflowers2k tells us more.

sunflowers2k 0

Saturday 10 December 2016 17:41

Lol! OP here, can't believe this got posted. I've always been the mother hen of my friends, and I really don't mind taking care of them. I'm not a big drinker anyways. But, all my friends had fun and my bf who hasn't been drunk in FOREVER had a great time, so that made it all worth it. Watching drunk people is pretty fun sometimes. :)

No way

By 3sacrowd - 17/11/2009 03:46 - Canada

Today, while I was in the middle of making love with my boyfriend, I mentioned bringing another woman in the picture to spice it up. He looked at me and said, "Let's ask your sister." He then got dressed and called her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 162

You deserved it 30 962

By Jersey girl - 08/12/2016 07:58 - United States - Miami

Today, I requested to have the next Sunday off of my job in retail. Not only did my boss say that we're not allowed to ask for weekends off anymore, but I also have to work on another weekend that I requested off. I guess I'm not going to my sister's wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 602

You deserved it 738

By Anonymous - 14/05/2017 21:00 - France

Today, I had a job interview. After two hours of commute, thirty minutes filling out questionnaires, and fifteen minutes of actual interview, the recruiter told me the post had already been filled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 783

You deserved it 271

Surprise!

By BAMashleyx3 - 06/06/2019 06:07

Today, my dad texted me while I was in the dentist's chair getting my teeth cleaned. The dental hygienist jumped at the notification sound my phone made and split my gum open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 913

You deserved it 678

By KingKralj - 04/12/2016 21:49 - United States - San Ramon

Today, I got an expensive drone for my birthday. My brother got a BB gun and thought it would be hilarious to shoot my drone with it while I was flying it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 809

You deserved it 865

KingKralj tells us more.

KingKralj 31

Tuesday 6 December 2016 21:28

Holy sweet shit, this got posted! Hello guys, OP here! I was angry when making this FML that I left out some pretty important details :P So here we go. My bro and I were having an argument about something stupid, and it escalated pretty bad. I hate full on yell-fests, so I left the scene and decided to fly my drone to relax. My brother, on the other hand, somehow got drunk and thought it would be a good idea to shoot my drone with his BB gun for revenge (no, he didn't get it on my b-day nor are we twins. He had it for a while). Long story short, he loaded the gun and shot my drone several times over. I yelled at him for like 10 seconds (I know I mentioned I hate yelling, but I was angry :l) and left the house. Later, he called me and apologized for destroying my drone and offered to either repair it or buy a new one out of his pocket. I said "eh, just buy it." because the drone was too damaged to be repaired. So the aftermath was we made up, he bought me a new drone, and we lived happily ever after c: