By Anonymous - 09/01/2014 17:59 - United States - Imperial

Spicy
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
I agree, your life sucks 65 066
You deserved it 7 760

Same thing different taste

Top comments

********** in front of him & tell him he's not allowed to help

What's the point of him telling you then?

Comments

Haha he's a jerk. Why'd he even call?

Perhaps to be flirty...before realizing he was too close to finishing so he had to "play it cool"?

Me, when I'm horny and sad, is not something any of you guys would ever want to witness!

You're right, cause we're not pervs, (at least I'm not.)

Lavelle1313 11

Thanks for the heads-up Simon.

I know it takes two to tango but I didn't know you could salsa solo.

What's the point of him telling you then?

I'm guessing he finished before she replied...

Lavelle1313 11

He should have manned up and just said "too late" or something, lol.

I I feel like he could be getting back at her from a time she rejected him of sex, when he was horny, and he just wanted to return the favor.

chocolatefrog28 29

If I were you I'd beat him when you got home, but it looks like he beat you to it. Or beat it to you. Whichever!

ThatFancyPenn 18

Not going to do anything. He's already beating himself [off]!

27 - that was the joke, smartypants xP

********** in front of him & tell him he's not allowed to help

Yes, call him a pervert when he wants to help or watch.

Das_is_gud 11

So many fml's about masturbation

If he knows he isn't going to get anything out of it, why would he stay and watch? He could just go and doing something.

97, ever heard of femdom? Maybe he likes being submissive.

buckeye1 9

He would just stand there and watch and probably do it himself while watching so it wouldn't hurt him that bad.

olpally 32

That's a waste of a phone call, and very insulting. He's an idiot for also wanting to ********** instead of having sex with you. What a jag off.

Hey, sometimes sex is too much of a hassle. Sucks that he texted her like that though.

jazzy_123 20

OP: "My fiance is such a douche bag. Texting me for nothing... wasting all my unlimited texting and shit..." haha x)