1771
The illustrated FMLs
By RC3Welly - / Monday 9 March 2009 22:58 / United States
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By  citylights  |  0

hahahahahaha that is fucked

By  Anony_fml  |  0

Pull out method doesn't work. You're fucked for life.

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By  citylights  |  0

hahahahahaha that is fucked

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  TheNinjaCat  |  10

today, I fucked this hawt guy whilste he was drunk. my plan went well too, I have him trapped with me forever, he's gonna be the daddy to my baby, he'll be sooooo happy!! (8)I wanna have your baby, I'm serious like crazy(8)

By  Anony_fml  |  0

Pull out method doesn't work. You're fucked for life.

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  sookie1  |  7

hooked on pull out worked for me :) lol

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  liray  |  4

dude. is that what they taught you? pulling out is only 2% less effective than condoms. combined with birthcontrol. it foolproof. so all of you saying ydi are just ignorant.

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  whoisthisgirl  |  4

Precum can contain sperm moron. get educated.

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  Jonny_Trump  |  0

1604: Yay, I don't have to scream at people through my iPod anymore. :) thank you, I now think there's some hope for humanity.

By  skatingweasel  |  0

that sucks. I would've said i was about to finish earlier to see what she would have done. But thats fucked up. Ill be watching to see the "Today, the girl i had drunken sex with a while ago who wrapped her legs around me told me she was pregnant. FML" Yeah, Il be waiting on one like that

By  spaghetti_fml  |  1

PROTIP: pulling out can still get her pregnant.

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  farsidee  |  0

how?

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  hbomb5150  |  0

pre-cum?

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  amandasoushek  |  16

1809, No, precum contains small amounts of live sperm... This thread just shows that schools need better sex Ed programs! Pulling out is not an effective form of birth control! The chances of getting pregnant off of precum is less than normal, but it is still a possibility and it happens all the time.

By  sniperpie  |  0

Should have punched her so she would let go

By  Mnemic  |  4

Hmm, the chance that she's actually pregnant is still pretty small. It just had to be the right time of the month and thats only 2 / 3 days a month.

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  PRimAl_HUnt3r  |  0

u can get pregnant anytime...even during a period

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  kkris10  |  0

are you retarded? you cannot get pregnant anytime. like above, there is about a 2-3 day window. why do you think women have to plan to get pregnant? if it was that easy, a lot more babies would be born

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  dmhgbz  |  0

Actually, you can get pregnant at any time. It's easier to get pregnant those few days, which is why people plan, but a woman can get pregnant at any time.

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  arienh4  |  0

Sure, the sperm cell will just get an egg and pull it into the womb.

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  guitargirlae  |  0

You cannot get pregnant at any time, or on your period. The only way is if the sperm that entered your body while you were ON your period lived long enough to reach the egg when you were actually ovulating. Which is highly unlikely. Using absolutely no protection, there is only about a 20 percent chance that you can get pregnant. The pullout method can also work. There are new studies that have proved that pre ejaculation does not contain any sperm, only if it's been in there from the last time you actually ejaculated.

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  dralven  |  0

Well I guess the internet just taught me that the degree I hold and all those college courses I took that said you can get pregnant any time of the month are just wrong then. And the text I'm holding right now that says you can get pregnant at any time. Yep. Mr. Internet, you taught me something today.

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  Nooo_fml  |  0

Yes, the internet can teach you what a degree can't and one is that you can't get pregnant any time. Have you not heard about women who have a diary to check when they can get pregnant?

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  onigiriqueen  |  0

No. See, when you OVULATE is when the egg passes into the tubes, and if sperm connects with the egg, then you get pregnant. But the egg is only alive for 1-2 days, max. Sperm lives in the womb for up to 3 days, as far as I know. So in order to get pregnant, you would have had to have sex during five-day window. During your period is when the egg is expelled from the womb until another egg presents itself two weeks later. The sperm doesn't go through your tubes and into the holding place of all the eggs-- seriously. That textbook was clearly written by Opie, and you are even dumber than he is for believing it.

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  iplayrugby18  |  11

Technically she's right...I see a lot of people commenting on how long sperm lives inside the human body. Technically a woman can get pregnant any time of the month IF the sperm lives long enough to fertilize the egg. The textbook you're reading or have read unfortunately might be out of date or their facts are flat out wrong (possibly why we have an on going problem of teenage pregnancies in the world). They are getting false information like you have read. Depending on the source I've seen books state sperm can live inside the human body for 3-5 days. I would imagine this depends on multiple factors such as vaginal pH, protection type, ect. When people cant get facts to line up correctly...just wear a condom.

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now after reading this comment and the one adobe I'm scared of having a child of my own in the future... and i'm thinking that its too hard to get a woman knocked up... seriously you guys were too technically on your comments... no offenses... but they were also smart and I can see you researched first.... IMO this guy of the fml is so fucked up that I want to see a continuation of this fml like today, my son was born... he is alive because I had drunk and unprotected sex with his mom.... btw excuse me... my English it's a little bit rusty

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  stewie1744  |  0

fuck!!! it's like sex Ed back in fuckin elementary school all over again! even if she's not ovulating, you can get her pregnant. u don't believe me? go out and try it, wait and see if the bitch doesn't get pregnant. personal experience fuckin sux

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  amazinggbaby  |  2

you CAN get pregnant without ovulating but I think the point these people are trying to make are that there's a slimmer chance of it. if you could get pregnant at any time you wanted why would couples have to try and plan for even months sometimes?

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To all you accidental babies out there that don't know shit, yes a pregnancy can happen at any time, that's how you were born you failures. gg tardwaffles.

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anyone else horny after reading these coments?

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  iTwitch  |  5

ahaaha

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  AmandaBoo2122  |  5

you people are dumb. obviously you haven't seen 16 and pregnant lmao. you honestly think you can't get knocked up just bc it's a certain day of the month. my cousin thought so too and now she has a 13 year old son. Haha, do some research.

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  BoColors  |  0

wow dumb fucks. everyone knows you can get pregnant at amytime. its justeasier at a ceetqin time of the moth. and people wonder why we have so many teen pregnanvys? educate them better!

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  caaklove  |  0

I got pregnant the day after my period. I was not ovulating and he even pulled out. plus I took a plan b pill the day after. and was on medication that risks the life of a potential child. it was my first time ever having sex. my son is 8 months old today and perfectly healthy. don't tell me you can't get pregnant at any time no matter what the circumstances are. my boy is a scientific miracle and my pride and joy!

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  jooliaboolia  |  6

that's definitely not true. girls can get pregnant during any time of the month, even on their period. what you're talking about is ovulation, and all it does is make her twice ad fertile.

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  Sk8er951  |  3

thank you for proving every dumb fuck wrong, "you can only get pregnant on 2 or 3 days of the month" everyone who thinks that are really fucking dumb. They should look it up and make themselves feel like they're stupid cuz they are

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  Montjo  |  8

You can only get pregnant when an egg is present and in the right place, which is only for a few days each month, and even then you might not get pregnant

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  joeyl1990  |  13

I wish this was a current FML so we could educate people here. There are only 2 or 3 days a month a woman can get pregnant and only about 4 or 5 days that sex can reault in pregnancy (since sperm can live inside the body for several days). There is even a contraceptive method using the ovulation cycle and can be 96% effective. Googleing this before replying would have been the way to go. It takes 30 seconds and is quickly confirmed.

By  missdarcy_fml  |  0

wow that sux... yeah the pulling out method doesn't work.... I am now an aunt cuz my brother in law thought that it would....

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