By doubleCoupon - 24/06/2014 18:38 - United States - San Francisco
The Top
By carpusher - 12/04/2009 02:51 - United States
Mystery pooch
By Scarred - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Marquette
By toxic waste - 12/02/2013 04:18 - United States - Tonawanda
By AppoKing - 19/02/2009 21:14 - United States
AppoKing tells us more.
By CA19oo - 16/01/2012 03:08 - United States
By oooooops - 23/03/2015 00:32 - United States
By silvernights21 - 05/01/2012 23:40 - United States
By ididntdoanythingaight - 02/08/2009 19:04 - United States
Get your facts straight
By Anonymous - 16/02/2010 02:09 - United States
By Anonymous - 18/02/2011 21:36 - United States
By Anonymous - 09/12/2011 18:44 - United States
Greasy
By jroberts - 25/01/2011 15:25
By Anonymous - 25/11/2010 23:39 - United States
By Lizzie - 30/05/2013 22:32 - United States - Rockford
By 2013bchan41 - 19/07/2014 02:22 - United States - Elmont
2013bchan41 tells us more.
Hey guys, this is the OP here, and this is actually my first FML ever :3 This actually happened to me back in September, I was on the highway on my way to school. What happened was the traffic was so bumper-to-bumper, due to a bigger accident ahead. I had my foot on the brake, so the car was stopped at the time (I wasn't driving while looking.) That's when I decided to look around and saw a lady with her eyes shut in the car next to me. I guess my foot slipped off the brake ever so slightly, because next thing I heard was a thump (the cars were so close together it happened in an instant.) Luckily we were able to pull over, and the lady didn't seem too angry at me. Neither of our bumpers were damaged too much, so I just called my dad and had her speak with him. In the end, I just paid them $600 instead of going to insurance, and my car (luckily) didn't suffer too much damage. Yes, I know it was my fault, and I've learned from my mistake, so now, even in heavy traffic, eyes on the road only!
By Miriden - 19/07/2011 14:41 - United States
By nicolo - 27/10/2009 20:10 - United States
By Anonymous - 08/05/2012 02:52 - United States
By LyraAlluse - 18/05/2014 23:35 - United States - Chandler
LyraAlluse tells us more.
He got stuck in one of those oddly shaped bathroom trashcans. And it was his tail end that got stuck, so he was sticking out of the trashcan like a jack-in-the-box. Because the can was oddly shaped it was hard to figure out how to get the cat free and make it as humane as possible. Also, the cat kept trying to roll around in the trash can because he thought it would help. My cat isn't the brightest crayon in the package but he is pretty funny.
By Porcelain - 03/10/2009 13:47 - United States
Weezie_rm tells us more.
So I wouldn't talk and the audience wouldn't hear me. And I didn't make any awkward sounds in the restroom either. All of a sudden the audience just heard a huge "FLUSH!!!!"Which is why the sound guys didnt have time to turn off the mic. And they apologized to me afterwards, but it was embarrassing. Now it's funny.
By peepeepainter - 07/01/2014 02:25 - United States - Jasper
By copenhagen20 - 05/03/2010 20:21 - United States
By 27musiclover - 16/08/2009 14:41 - United States
By boo - 16/02/2010 20:46 - United States
Besties for life
By no cake for me - 07/11/2012 07:31 - United States - Jackson Heights
By joecool3426 - 03/10/2013 06:23 - United States
By sadbride - 26/10/2012 03:58 - Bahamas - Nassau
The book of revelations
By JSeth - 04/07/2009 16:52 - Canada
By Olive14 - 16/12/2010 20:03 - United States
Olive14 tells us more.
Haha, alright, I'm gonna try to clear this up. It wasn't my car. We were with two guys and it was the guy she was hooking up with's car. I was sitting in the front seat talking with the other guy (you know, 'cause I kinda have this thing where I DON'T hook up with guys I've just met), when we heard sounds from the back and realized they were *******. It's freezing here this time of year, so there was nowhere to go and it was wayyyy too cold to get out of the car. Most. Awkward. Moment. Of. My. Life.
Keywords
In reference to everyone who wants to know how he teaches: He uses power points and is able to type, change slides, and use a laser pointer with his foot (I think only one leg is actually real). He teaches psychology and is an amazing teacher.