Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML
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By
Doortje
| 29
So you thought a ham was an animal? What did you think it looked like? What sound did you think it made?
By
ScaryyMary
| 14
Actually, ham is a fruit. Haven't you ever driven past a ham farm and seen the inbred Republicans plucking the ripe, juicy, pink hams from the tallest trees? I can take you to one, it's such an inspiring sight. Afterward, we can go snipe hunting, I know a GREAT spot.
COMMENTS
By
Winter247
| 2
pigs are smarter than dolphins.
Reply
ScaryyMary
| 14
Nuuuuuuuuuuuh uhhhhhhhhh, dolphins are the second most intelligent life form on Earth, second only to mice.
Reply
Winter247
| 2
you can't argue with a face like mine.
Reply
ScaryyMary
| 14
I just did.
Reply
Winter247
| 2
you're obviously a bimbo.
Reply
ScaryyMary
| 14
At least I know how to use the 'Shift' key.
Reply
thatsparksguy
| 0
ScaryyMary, are you saying that mice are smarter than humans?
Reply
allmidnighteyes
| 10
If the FML community is a fair representation of humanity's intelligence as a whole, then I'd say we're somewhere around the 10th percentile.
Reply
SirEBC
| 7
Midnight, that's being too generous.
Reply
sloppyflow
| 1
pigs are smarter than op
Reply
VianaJ_Garcia
| 14
Humans are the smartest only because they can build weapons the are able to kill the other animals and that is it.
Reply
the_ace1337
| 0
61 that's not how you measure intelligence lol.
Reply
Troll1
| 0
but it is
Reply
StoryOfTheYear
| 13
Mice, Mice, baby, Mice
Reply
TheShadesMaster
| 0
65, That is how you measure intelligence because we are the obvious outcome of survival of the fittest and are dominant on this planet; therefore, we are the most intelligent.
Reply
XxPurplePandaxX
| 0
87-Exactly.
Reply
epic13
| 12
dolphins are the only other mammal that have sexual intercores for pleasure.
Reply
emmeau
| 1
haha was that a reference to hitchhiker's guide? :D
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Yes, but humans are the only ones who can spell "intercourse".
Well, some humans...
Well, some humans...
Reply
Macromartyr
| 3
What animal does tooth paste come from?
Reply
collegegirl87
| 0
91, Actually bonobo monkeys do too
Reply
rickydebacle
| 0
I like how nobody got ScarrMary's reference
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Ricky, not everyone has read whatever the hell ScaryMary is referring to. I know I haven't.
Don't panic!
Don't panic!
Reply
Triad24
| 0
Hahaha ^^ -Like-
Reply
someindiandude
| 6
Actually, Bonobos fall under apes, and I learnt a new thing about them assuming you are right.
Reply
ScaryyMary
| 14
I like how no one can spell my name. Who the hell are these ScarrMary and ScaryMary people?
Reply
Kelita
| 0
#5 ur an ass for putting that as ur profile pic. U think that's funny but it's not. That person is prob going through alot and there u go thinking it's funny. Ur ridiculous.
Reply
iluvu2death
| 0
126 I was going to say that .. y do u have that picture u heartless guy.
Reply
Doortje
| 29
Ah, don't worry Mary, no one ever gets my name right either :( It's always Dortje, Doorje, Dorje, or, this was the worst, I'll remember it for the rest of my life: Doogri.
Reply
The_Dude_Abides_
| 0
If dolphins were so smart they would stop getting caught in tuna nets and my tuna sandwiches would not taste as good they do.....yummmmy dolphin and mayo on white bread!!!
Reply
bariforlife
| 0
agree wit 87 and 126
Reply
MrBond007_fml
| 6
sorry doortje, I said doortji last time
by the way, you still want to see a pic of doc right? ( the funniest thing just happened, I just hit "I" instead of "o" for doc on my I pod, that would have been awkward, bullet dodged!!)
by the way, you still want to see a pic of doc right? ( the funniest thing just happened, I just hit "I" instead of "o" for doc on my I pod, that would have been awkward, bullet dodged!!)
Reply
Doortje
| 29
I doubt he's ever going to show one, now matter how many times you bring up the subject ;)
Reply
JohnBoyFsYL
| 10
#126- You're an ass for putting THAT as your profile picture. that girl is probably going through a lot. it's not funny.
Reply
Kelita
| 0
182 can't b worse than ur pic.....at least ppl can tell Wut sex I am. Wit that bein said....male or female?
Reply
gress269
| 4
Humans and Dolphins are the only two creatures alive (that we know of) who enjoy sex. So, us two are obviousky the best.
Reply
kiss_1214
| 17
What about humans?? We're are animals
Reply
capslockisgood
| 19
3 - Crows are smarter than dolphins.
By
Jessa_Bo_Bessa
| 0
Wow.
Reply
FMLandurstoo
| 9
I'm stupid. FML
Reply
palltaru
| 0
lol^^^
Reply
yesiyes
| 0
looooll :D
Reply
banana_buddy
| 6
WAIT HAM ISN'T AN ANIMAL!?!??! Then how do u explain the flying roasted pig legs with giant devil horns that go MOOINK MOOINK in my back yard every night????
Reply
ljr1094
| 7
Bahahahahaha
Reply
robotnhi
| 0
You were right OP. Ham is from hamsters and pork are from pigs. Dont let those humans fool you.
By
Doortje
| 29
So you thought a ham was an animal? What did you think it looked like? What sound did you think it made?
Reply
PeteyPablo12308
| 20
Duh!!! Haven't you ever heard of the wild and rare 'ham-bone'? What a beautiful creature...
Reply
cmac86
| 23
my thoughts exactly!
Reply
bariforlife
| 0
hahaha
Reply
sandythongs
| 1
it could be harvested from manbearpig im super dooper serial
Reply
kiss_1214
| 17
Lol southpark ex vice prez algore or however you spell his name XD
Reply
NikkiRainbow63
| 31
Or OP could be a total sicko and think it came from hamsters... and now that I said that, holy shit those would have to be huge hamsters... xD
Reply
teentee401
| 36
247: His name is Al Gore. First name Al. Last name Gore.
By
Scottz
| 0
Th!!!! n DMBSS!!! PLRS TQMB MH DWEZ!!!
Reply
Doortje
| 29
Seriously?
Reply
ryanst
| 7
..I think I just lost brain cells from reading this.
Reply
YtotsDI
| 0
whhaaa? hfbg jhuhr hukctvvhkbg hhhhhhggh
Reply
thisgirl2u
| 9
wht th fck r y tryng t sy ??? Seriously, doesn't it take more effort to remove the vowels? Because it took far more effort for me to try to read your sentence, I truly do not understand this new epidemic.
Reply
shaaayyee
| 0
.....and your calling OP the dumbass? hah. wooooww.
Reply
amrik
| 11
bro learn to type!!
Reply
uffiewuffie
| 0
You are retarded
Reply
Ninjasaurus18
| 9
... I am sorry, but your dumbass answer is not valid. Go to kindergarten, and come back later.
Reply
lilny5613
| 10
What? Could you please repeat that? The only language I speak is English
Reply
asinforasin
| 1
I didn't even attempt to read this, and I'm normally pretty tolerant of bad grammar/spelling....
By
TheDrop
| 0
i want a pet doplin
Reply
InBetweenDreams
| 0
Yeah, everyone knows doplins are the most fantastic animals ever. :) I want one too.
Reply
PeteyPablo12308
| 20
What is a 'doplin'???
Reply
Troll1
| 0
a circumcised unicorn
Reply
TheDrop
| 0
a doplin is you. a foot looking creature
Reply
allmidnighteyes
| 10
No, that's Sarah Jessica Parker.
Reply
stitchedXDteddy
| 0
lol
By
vip3r20
| 8
are you in ms rods class? lmao just wondering
By
ScaryyMary
| 14
Actually, ham is a fruit. Haven't you ever driven past a ham farm and seen the inbred Republicans plucking the ripe, juicy, pink hams from the tallest trees? I can take you to one, it's such an inspiring sight. Afterward, we can go snipe hunting, I know a GREAT spot.
Reply
midnightsun123
| 2
Haha fuck republicans xD
Reply
Dillonjjohnson
| 0
are you stupid? of course, probably voted for Nader
Reply
Frankinatore98
| 0
This comment just made my day, Democrat4lyfe :D
By
k246lol
| 0
lol
By
Ur1Temptazian
| 0
That's not FML...you're just an idiot!
By
mea_iloveskiing
| 26
Aww you thought it was part of a unicorn :)
p.s. How do you think we get cheese? :D
p.s. How do you think we get cheese? :D
Reply
idklalaalala
| 0
it grows on a bush...durrrrrrr
Reply
sneakysnake
| 0
You get cheese from cows...
Reply
matkeller
| 0
WHAT?! how come no one told me! sneakysnake you cheeky soul..
Reply
sneakysnake
| 0
Yeah, but #16 thinks that you get cheese from pigs
Reply
mea_iloveskiing
| 26
That's sad if you think so.
Reply
Spenerish
| 0
Don't mess with Texas! Remember the Alamo!
Reply
thew_fml
| 14
the texans lost at the alamo
Reply
archzinno
| 0
you remembered!
Reply
kprando25
| 8
iiCaptain, you sir are a bastard.
I am a Texan and I scored top of my class on the standardized tests in fifth grade. I bet that's more than you can say.
I am a Texan and I scored top of my class on the standardized tests in fifth grade. I bet that's more than you can say.