acab93
United States
Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Dammit
Long Beach, United States
Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML
zac545
United States
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
Face
Australia
Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML
HamHanded
Ham-fisted attempt
Today, my loving but absent-minded father gave me a packet of ham for my birthday, which would be pretty shit even if I hadn't been a strict vegetarian for the last 27 years. FML
whymommywhy
United States
Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
Username
United States
Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML
erinbarto
Soon.
Today, I listened to my mom having a conversation with my dog, asking him if he ate my hamster. My hamster isn't even dead. FML
Anonymous
United States
Leftovers
Today, my daughter brought home her class hamster for the weekend. It escaped and we spent hours searching for it. We later found it in the fridge, eating our leftover pizza. I never knew hamsters had such a refined palate. FML
pigglepigglepiggle
United States
Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML
Top comments
Doortje 30
So you thought a ham was an animal? What did you think it looked like? What sound did you think it made?
ScaryyMary 14
Actually, ham is a fruit. Haven't you ever driven past a ham farm and seen the inbred Republicans plucking the ripe, juicy, pink hams from the tallest trees? I can take you to one, it's such an inspiring sight. Afterward, we can go snipe hunting, I know a GREAT spot.
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Comments (265)
sl1ck8427 0
you are retarded
Foltzie 0
Dude I came out of the womb knowing what ham was........
ashtonTS 0
Why? Cause your mom's ****** looked like a lacerated one?
ashtonTS 0
Why? Cause your mom's ****** looked like a lacerated ham hock?
cowgod123 0
hahahahahahah
splarf1991 0
are you blond? cause damn...
vettle 6
I'm speechless
seximexi911 10
haha it's ok, I'm sure all of us have our dee dee dee moments
bfunee 0
your a dult
fearnoevil175 3
hope you aren't jewish
LADYGAGAGOOGA 0
he won a car. the secret word was hamster
srharrison09 0
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! good one!
princessjasmine2_fml 0
Just wait until Texas starts to edit our public school's history books.