acab93
United States
Today, I learned that ham is part of a pig, and not a completely different animal. I'm eighteen. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Dammit
Long Beach, United States
Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML
zac545
United States
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
Face
Australia
Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML
HamHanded
Ham-fisted attempt
Today, my loving but absent-minded father gave me a packet of ham for my birthday, which would be pretty shit even if I hadn't been a strict vegetarian for the last 27 years. FML
whymommywhy
United States
Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
Username
United States
Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML
erinbarto
Soon.
Today, I listened to my mom having a conversation with my dog, asking him if he ate my hamster. My hamster isn't even dead. FML
Anonymous
United States
Leftovers
Today, my daughter brought home her class hamster for the weekend. It escaped and we spent hours searching for it. We later found it in the fridge, eating our leftover pizza. I never knew hamsters had such a refined palate. FML
pigglepigglepiggle
United States
Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML
Top comments
Doortje 30
So you thought a ham was an animal? What did you think it looked like? What sound did you think it made?
ScaryyMary 14
Actually, ham is a fruit. Haven't you ever driven past a ham farm and seen the inbred Republicans plucking the ripe, juicy, pink hams from the tallest trees? I can take you to one, it's such an inspiring sight. Afterward, we can go snipe hunting, I know a GREAT spot.
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Comments (265)
Griggy 0
Are you ******* retarded?
Buggi_fml 0
Actually it's the butt of any animal thus turkey ham. I used to think turkey ham was a mix of the two but nope it's the turkey's butt.
katlynn_godwin 0
so where does turkey bacon come from?
jemm94 0
no it isnt, they make make turkey taste like other meats so people who dont eat that meat can still have the taste but from a turkey...
Grapist69 3
Really, ham comes from pigs?! I thaught it came from hamsters... No wonder i couldn't my brother's hamsters tasting like ham...
sourgirl101 29
Pork chops >baby back ribs >ham >Canadian Bacon >regular bacon. All pig!
THEmuffinpan 0
Your priorities are wildly off, miss. ^.^
Dianna_Mariee 0
Honestly, FML's like these are just spams and a waste. Recently, they've sucked. Especially this one. Woohoo..
allmidnighteyes 11
Then instead of bitching about it in the comment section, go in and help moderate, because it's the users who vote and choose which ones make it.
Dianna_Mariee 0
No shit Sherlock. Thanks for the advice.
idklalaalala 0
thats not FML that's ISS: I'm so stupid!!! I'm 12 and knew that forever
BeastNerd 3
#39 Wow. I honestly hope you’re just screwing with me. I’m twelve too, and I sincerely hope you can write better than those atrocious sentences.
thesinginguy 18
no you are not twelve it's more like... stuck up bitch.
salsalover_12 5
Awwwwwww,you're so smart for a twelve year old. That is absolutely adorableeeee. :D
litebluebaby 0
Your ******* stupid. This FML sucks. Bye Bye!
allmidnighteyes 11
"Your ******* stupid." Pot, meet kettle.
Troll1 0
spongeeebobble!!
Domo_Arigato7 3
Wow really? When I was like 8 I went all jewish when I found that out
smushies_fml 0
did you go to school ??
tacobird123 7
Well, you are from Texas. No kidding xD! but yeah c,mon my 5 year old brother knows that.