Neighbours

Some fans take it too far

By Anonymous - 12/06/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I finally figured out what two kids in my neighborhood have been yelling for what seems like the past month. I don't know where they are exactly, so my efforts to get them to knock it off has almost made me go insane, all from hearing them yell "CHICKEN JOCKEY!" over and over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 337

You deserved it 62

Loitering

By Anonymous - 05/06/2025 06:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I forgot my keys when going out. Now I have to wait at the door for my family, standing in the cold for half an hour. My phone is dying, and neighbors keep giving me pitying looks. It's so awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 319

Amazing idea, idiot

By Anonymous - 31/05/2025 16:00 - United States - Augusta

Today, my idiot redneck next door neighbor decided to throw an empty whipped cream spray can into a fire to watch it explode and scare half the neighborhood. That idiot redneck next door neighbor is also my 65 year-old dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 87

Call CPS?

By ToxicNeighbors - 31/05/2025 12:00 - Germany

Today, my neighbour is a doctor and has a 2 year-old son. He has a stomach infection and has been crying non stop day and night for a week now. The woman is not taking him to the hospital or giving him medicines, because it's "just diarrhea" and will "go away." The crying is driving me mad. I can't sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 59

Praise the Lord

By Anonymous - 11/05/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, at 7am on a Saturday, my next door neighbor set up a preacher guy with a mic and large speaker. It's 2pm, and I can still hear him screaming about Jesus through my foam insulated walls and $300 noise canceling headphones. I can't sleep, and I'm injured so I can't leave home. That's my Shabbat ruined! FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 121

Close proximity

By Anonymous - 01/05/2025 09:00 - Germany - Jesteburg

Today, I am appalled that my neighbor was fired from his job. Not because I pity him, but because now he will not only light his stinking grill under my living room window every single night, but also play his radio outside all day long. Also right under my window. His garden is HUGE by the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 103

Arnold Layne

By Anonymous - 28/04/2025 12:00 - United States - Portland

Today, my cat brought me a “gift” by dragging in a sock from my neighbor’s porch. It was a child's sock. I took it back to them, but I'm pretty sure the neighbor now thinks I steal clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 103

Living alone, but not really

By Anonymous - 20/04/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I finally have my own space and was hopeful that I would get to improve myself in different ways, personally… except that the thin walls contradicts my personal goal during this moment of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 141

Shards

By Anonymous - 17/03/2025 15:00 - United States - Glendale

Today, I was mowing my lawn when I lost control along our lawn borders and ran over one of my neighbor’s many garden gnomes. It exploded into a pile of ceramic. I soon discovered it was a limited edition collector's item when the neighbor came out just in time to see me turning her prized lawn decoration into shards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 456

The noise of God

By Anonymous - 16/03/2025 19:00

Today, my neighbour shouted at me for starting my car early in the morning because "a decent, God-fearing man" has no business going places in the dark "when Satan is about his wicked business." I’m a priest and I have a funeral to prepare for this morning. That's about as un-Satan like as you can get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 70

Make yourselves at home

By unlucky neighbors - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - China - Shanghai

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 736

You deserved it 3 440

Stranger danger

By Dani - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I happened to make eye contact with a stranger standing on a balcony of the apartment building across the train tracks from mine. He ran his finger across his neck like a knife and winked at me. I'm afraid to go out again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 332

You deserved it 2 690

Hush!

By Anonymous - 03/03/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I received a letter signed “anonymously” by at least 6 of my neighbours that unless I do something about my loud nightmares they’re going to start calling the police every time it happens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 143

Whoomp whoomp

By Alice - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Happy Valley

Today, my neighbor's daughter started learning how to play the trombone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 547

You deserved it 5 467

Amityville

By bumpinthenight - This FML is from back in 2020 but it's good stuff

Today, I was painting my new house when my neighbor introduced himself. Mid-conversation, he said, "The lady who lived here was nice, but just couldn't get over her husband hanging himself in the garage. Or her son shooting himself in the basement." I'll never sleep again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 410

You deserved it 438

Welcome to the neighborhood

By Desperate housewife - 13/02/2025 22:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I tried to make a good first impression by bringing homemade cookies to my new neighbors. I dropped the entire plate of cookies on their porch, and the dog across the street immediately rushed over and ate them. My new neighbors were very polite about it, but I’m pretty sure they think I'm a psycho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 121

Good boy

By Anonymous - 07/02/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, someone has been knocking at my back door all day then running away, driving me mad. Turns out, next door has a new dog and the knocking was actually the dog wagging its tail hard against their back door. This means it won’t ever stop, it’s going to keep banging that damn tail forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 113

Not very neighborly

By Kris - 31/01/2025 00:00 - India

Today, I pretended to be on a work call to avoid talking to my neighbour. Mid-fake call, my phone actually rang. I had to answer it and have two simultaneous conversations while avioding eye contact with my neighbour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82

You deserved it 482

Googoo gaga

By Daisie - 24/01/2025 00:00 - United States - Santa Fe

Today, I spent way too long baby-talking my neighbor’s dog through the fence, calling him "the cutest, sweetest baby." It turned out that my neighbor was sitting on the other side of the fence the entire time, out of view, quietly giggling at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 410

Loyalty

By No way - 10/01/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I discovered my cat prefers my neighbour. I know this because she posted pictures of him on Instagram, captioned "My new baby." FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 190

Mamaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

By Anonymous - 08/01/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I mistook my neighbor’s karaoke party for a heated argument and called the cops. When they arrived, everyone was in the middle of a dramatic rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 607

Just corpsing

By Anonymous - 07/01/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I took a nap on my couch. I woke up three hours later to my neighbor knocking on my door, asking if I was OK because looking from the outside in, they thought I was dead. Guess I sleep like I’ve been hit by a truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 95

Busted

By Sometimes you gotta get tough - 02/01/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, after the seventh morning in a row where my son threw a fit because he wanted to wear summer clothes, I put him in shorts and a tank top and put him outside. He got the message and changed into long sleeves and pants. Ten minutes later, cops pull up. My nosy neighbor called CPS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 615

You deserved it 109

The dipshit in 4B

By DookDaSpook - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, while I was in a very important meeting on Skype, my apartment complex was evacuated due to the fire alarm going off. The reason was that my neighbor put a fork in his microwave due to him being extremely drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 897

You deserved it 1 384

Dogging at home

By Anonymous - 24/12/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my wife and I got freaky in the living room. Apparently we didn’t close the curtain all the way because three of our neighbours called the police. There was barely a 4 inch gap in the curtain. They must've had their noses right up to the window, or using binoculars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 133

Karen of the day

By Anonymous - 21/11/2024 06:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, my ultra-Christian neighbor called the cops on me (again). This time, it was because she could smell "weed" coming from my apartment. I was burning sage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 114

Metal Zone

By Anonymous - 10/11/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, our baby refuses to sleep through the night. My dad told us to play Heavy Metal because it put me to sleep as a baby. We are currently playing "Jekyll and Hyde" by Five Finger Death Punch on repeat and she’s been asleep for 7 hours. Unfortunately, the neighbours are furious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 208

Nice neighborhood you've got here

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my neighbours kicked my football back over the fence. They'd slashed it and taped a note to the remains that said, "Do it again and it'll be your face." Now I'm scared to play football in my own backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 887

You deserved it 4 115

Trash day

By AlfieBoyo - 06/11/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I got locked out of my house in my pajamas while trying to take the trash out. My neighbor offered to help, but only after taking a picture of me for "future laughs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 359

You deserved it 138

Trash talking little dude

By Proud momma - 03/11/2024 20:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my toddler learned the phrase “Shut up.” He now loudly says it to anyone who speaks to him, including our elderly neighbor, whose only crime was complimenting him on his shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 196

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The Top

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865 193

You deserved it 95 067

Today, after a year and a half of sticking to my new wife’s “no-sex-before marriage” rule while we dated, she brushed me off while I tried to consummate the marriage. Apparently, she’s not ready to have kids yet and “semen will get the sheets dirty.” Guess I’ll be jerking it on my honeymoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 859

You deserved it 810

The Top

Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 794

You deserved it 1 561

Today, my boss asked me to help train his son, so I put him to work cleaning tools covered in oil. He didn’t warn me his son has a violent temper, and would overreact at being asked to work for a living by dumping the bucket of tools on my head, breaking my glasses and concussing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 370

You deserved it 84

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. As we got to the ticket booth, a couple of girls queued behind us. My boyfriend graciously introduced me as his little sister, and invited the girls to join us. We've been together for two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 584

You deserved it 7 073

Today, I reluctantly went to a family get together. My nosy aunt decided to try to lecture me on why I should spank my kids. That’s great coming from a woman who was a teen mom, had kids with 3 different guys, and now has grown kids that hate her guts. Yeah I truly need lessons on how to be a mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 944

You deserved it 113

Today, I decided to act on my therapist's advice and ask my crush out. She turned me down because I'm apparently too much of a downer. The reason I have a therapist is because I'm depressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 052

You deserved it 1 256

Today, I was bored at work, so I started doodling a big muscly arm on my notepad, including bulging veins. After I returned from lunch, my boss called me into his office. Apparently the mail clerk saw and was offended. I was asked to explain why I was drawing a person's 'private area'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 478

You deserved it 7 756