by tgd4444 / 07/23/2011 at 6:29am / Malaysia (Johor) / Miscellaneous
BluPenguin's comment : Fuck cops.
Today, I'm staying in a hotel where the lights are automatic. They turn on when something moves and turn off when everything is still. I'm a sensitive sleeper and I move in my sleep, so the light wakes me up. It's currently 2 a.m. and all together I've gotten about 20 minutes of sleep. FML
by someone / 07/23/2011 at 4:50am / United States / Miscellaneous
julielee509's comment : What kind of hotel is that?
by MaHalKiTa / 07/23/2011 at 3:49am / United States (California) / Geek
by oliveoyl / 07/23/2011 at 12:05am / United States (California) / Kids
Youtube00's comment : mommy, where the fuck is my milk?
by Anonymous / 07/22/2011 at 9:10pm / United States (New York) / Love
by jab43 / 07/22/2011 at 8:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I was discussing the traffic with my brother. He said the most common car colour is red. I said it was black. We ended up betting €100 on which three vehicles of either colour would pass by our house first. It seems a convoy of fire trucks had somewhere to be in a hurry. FML
by zerom / 07/22/2011 at 8:52pm / France / Money
Today, I went to see a movie I'd been waiting months for. A couple of women sat down a few rows in front of me with five infants. The infants cried and wailed throughout. I'm not sure I have any idea what was actually said in any of the dialogue. FML
by AceGeek / 07/22/2011 at 7:49pm / United States (California) / Kids
by coffee girl / 07/22/2011 at 4:31pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in a pool locker room, surrounded by semi-naked people. While changing into my clothes, I accidentally pushed a button on my phone, causing it to make the loud, unmistakable camera shutter sound effect. Everyone definitely heard it. FML
by Roode / 07/22/2011 at 1:36pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
by quickfingers100 / 07/22/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by TKDConnor92 / 07/22/2011 at 6:51am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/22/2011 at 2:29am / United States (Texas) / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…