Today, my wife of 2 years told me she was pregnant, after we've been trying for ages. Excited, about to call my parents, my wife then told me, "Don't get your hopes up it might not be yours, the father could be 5 other guys." And then asked me what I'd like for dinner. FML
Add a comment - Reply to : #
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account
Sign in
Top comments
By
SparkleMotion44
| 0
divorce that whore brah
By
Jessi_the_sexii
| 0
answer: I want a divorce for dinner
COMMENTS
By
SparkleMotion44
| 0
divorce that whore brah
Reply
heyred
| 11
Twisted Canadian humor, I hope?
Reply
De3z
| 0
wow... I don't even no what to say to that... xcept I'm SO sorry you married a cheating whore bitch that gets knocked up by 1 of 6 guys and tells you like it's no big deal...
Reply
paprikacha
| 9
Yeah...I hope it was twisted Canadian humor too. Maybe the baby'll pop out looking exactly like him and she'll be all 'Did you think I was serious? lol' and everyone'll have a good nervous/relieved laugh together.
If not, it's time to throw that bitch in the road. -_-
If not, it's time to throw that bitch in the road. -_-
Reply
Tweety122888
| 0
wow really what a whore. get a DNA test right after the birth. you don't wanna pay for child support fir a child that may not ge even yours.
Reply
comatoast
| 0
I'm impressed that she has time between getting nailed by six different guys to even make dinner. YDI for having a huge whore for a wife.
Reply
godofcyanide
| 8
OP, it's called "sarcasm." Learn about it, and know that you have experienced it!
Reply
Einstein714
| 0
did she make you a sammich?
Reply
meelmo
| 0
lawl
Reply
missmontreal97
| 4
yeah.
she was either joking...
or if not,
divorce her.
whore.
she was either joking...
or if not,
divorce her.
whore.
Reply
xraytek
| 0
divorce her and never look back even if the kid is yours you don't want a tainted child that will remind you of your whore wife. you'll never love it. and get yourself tested for STDs you knows what 5 other guys are infested with.
Reply
That_Guy_Jake_JR
| 0
Sorry OP, hopefully it is yours. I don't need another kid to take care of -_-
Reply
godofcyanide
| 8
I disagree, 73. Get a sense of humor.
Reply
lildrummerboy47
| 0
wow and she doesn't see any problem with that? just tell her straight up that's it's a problem cause she clearly doesn't realize what a marriage is supposed to be about. give her hell. lol. fyl op and sdi if you give der crap for it.
Reply
trenton95
| 4
godofcyanide. dude your a retard. why would a wife just throw things like that around like it's just not right. you need to get a real sense of humor
Reply
nitaaxboo
| 0
wow what a hoe that's soo wrong leave her
Reply
mrguy266
| 0
I agree with 80, if she is being sarcastic, then he has a wife an awesome sense of humor. but it she is serious..well fyl.
Reply
chopra
| 0
ur wife is a slut
Reply
twinny_sc
| 13
Well...what did you want for dinner?
Reply
gingernator
| 0
well, i think the reason she did this was to get pregnant. since they have been trying for ages and no success, that means that the OP is sterile. so they still wanted a kid so she decided to go overboard and get nailed by 5 guys to ensure that she got pregnant. if she wasn't doing it for them and to get pregnant then she wouldn't have told him, otherwise she's the most honest whore in the world.
Reply
bamditzki
| 0
what a b...!
Reply
woofis
| 0
bukkake!
Reply
LexBvl
| 4
80, get a new face.
Reply
That_Guy_Jake_JR
| 0
111- You tell him to get a new face, but yours is a question mark.
Reply
Sharpie23
| 7
wow 5 other guys....wow
btw you better have told her to make you a sammich!
YDI for being fat
btw you better have told her to make you a sammich!
YDI for being fat
Reply
Larios222
| 1
keep it pimp hand strong and smack that hoe!!!
Reply
jjosies
| 1
so, whats for dinner?
Reply
Brittney_E
| 0
wow. fyl. so how awkward was it at the dinner table?
Reply
Hamsterzilla
| 0
eeww what a slut.
Reply
godofcyanide
| 8
111 - Thank you for the compliment. Please, keep them coming.
Reply
niles_f1
| 0
this could be a Maury Povich episode!
Reply
Canuck13
| 12
Is "cheated" from Ontario gonna have to choke a bitch?
Reply
theFMLwhore5
| 0
OP, she likes it the vagina abit to much..she's a slutty whore bag whore. lol
Reply
LinsKitty
| 0
lmfao @38
Reply
Ashley121645
| 0
what is she fucked op's relatives then fucked him INCEST yuck!
Reply
lilmisslovely13
| 15
OP if I were you, I wouldn't jump to conclusions. She might be serious, but she'd have to be pretty stupid to say it like that. My feeling is that she's joking. It's not funny, though.
Reply
thenextnash1
| 0
Learn humor
Reply
fatcow282
| 8
Your assuming. I honesly dk hope she was joking but if not that must suck
By
rockhound
| 0
dude, that sucks.
Reply
ImSoBaKed
| 0
hmmm... in my opinion, this sounds fake, but I could (highly doubt it) be wrong.
Reply
LookinLikeDrake
| 0
make sure that baby isn't yours and Toss that bitch so she can't leech via child support if she bounces with some other guys
Reply
mysfit
| 0
for sure! fuck that. sorry, op, that you found yourself with a slut. that sucks. but, yeah.. make sure to find out if the baby's yours or not and then leave the trash at the dumpster.
By
JRSOne
| 5
holla
By
JRSOne
| 5
some girls deserve to die. I have that tatted on my back. you should too
By
bobB700
| 0
slut. dump her
Reply
shanie123
| 10
agreed... better hope it's not yours
By
FFML_314
| 11
That's a bit extreme 5. Especially seeing as she's going to be a mother.
Anyway, OP I'm sorry about your wife being a cheating tramp. I hope you get the better sense to leave her ass.
Anyway, OP I'm sorry about your wife being a cheating tramp. I hope you get the better sense to leave her ass.
By
lilmami0823
| 0
DIVORCE tht nasty bitch!!! I kno she's ur wife but rly... DIVORCE tht bitch!!!
By
Jessi_the_sexii
| 0
answer: I want a divorce for dinner
Reply
lickmyjock
| 0
mmm I'd rather just snack on you.
Reply
xFalzz
| 0
That made me lol irl. :D
Reply
Jessi_the_sexii
| 0
sorry 16 ur not my typee lol
Reply
lickmyjock
| 0
fine you can have mr 17 Justin bieber instead.
Reply
Jessi_the_sexii
| 0
hes not my type either haha
Reply
xFalzz
| 0
21, u mad?
Reply
johnnyexpl0sion
| 0
really 21? getting mad some girl politely turned you down on fml? get a life kid.
Reply
lickmyjock
| 0
lol 26. and 30, you need a new sarcasm detector.
Reply
InDenial
| 6
Damn 30, you got owned by 31 and you haven't thought of another comeback yet.
Reply
roflinyourwaffle
| 0
40,
dude...i don't even...
dude...i don't even...
Reply
lickmyjock
| 0
you're not my type either 24 but ya still are pretty. :-)
Reply
ninomunoz
| 0
24 - Whoever took that photo of you did a really great job with the lighting. You're like half-brunette, half-blonde! And your eyes came out gorgeous, too. Is it a senior pic?
Reply
ohthebloodygore
| 16
Jessi- hah, all the guys crowd in you!:p
Reply
ohthebloodygore
| 16
On*
Reply
roflinyourwaffle
| 0
around*
third time's the charm.
third time's the charm.
Reply
johnnyexpl0sion
| 0
lol @ 40, how did I get "owned" by that statement? need a new sarcasm detector? wtf lol. also, i dont spend my every waking moment on fml. this is the first time i checked this post since i responded to it earlier.
Reply
ohthebloodygore
| 16
It's neither seeing as how it's the Internet, those terms refer to real life.
Reply
DevilDoll
| 0
I think she took it herself(:
Reply
rasellersjr
| 0
win
Reply
Jessi_the_sexii
| 0
my senior pictures are from 2 years ago, i took this 1 on the fourth of july i was outside and took a picture it looked pretty fly so i kept it(: no photo shop just luck 'o the draw
By
misfitSuperStar
| 0
She's NASTY dude!!! Did that not upset you at ALL??
By
jdfml90
| 0
It's times like these that... domestic violence is ok.
Reply
myschyveus
| 0
37, is contradictive hypocrisy a specialty of yours?
damn op, if she's not joking, I feel for you kid.
damn op, if she's not joking, I feel for you kid.
Reply
TheIrishJaneDoe
| 8
85: I don't see any contradictive hypocrisy in pendatik's comment. Self-defense is NOT the same thing as domestic violence.
Reply
bluelobster889
| 0
Word
Reply
dcea
| 17
no, it's not. never has been, never will be.