By Anonymous - 07/01/2012 00:01 - United States

Spicy
Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news: I'm probably not the father. FML
I agree, your life sucks 53 373
You deserved it 4 397
Intimacy
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Top comments

bobbycorwen 5

That's great news for in the long run! For now, no. I am sorry she's a cheating *****. :(

263 10
kjcamaro3 5

No diaper changing for you...more good news!!!

250 8

Comments

kjcamaro3 5

No diaper changing for you...more good news!!!

250 8
IphonFML 6

i'll be seeing this in maury soon :)

22 2
ColdplaySucks 18

If you aren't the father, I think that outweighs the bad news for you at least.

15 1
shovels 0

A real man would consider the good news and bad news, in this case, switched.

36 17
bobbycorwen 5

Not everyone finds pregnancy good news.

19 6
BarDownDaily 12

Key word: Probably.

15 1
iliketurdles 7

KeyWord: ... Coldplay Sucks? Wait what? GTFO. Just GTFO.

6 32
RussianFox 13

At least now he can dump that lying bitch. Sorry OP atleast you dodged a bullet and didn't marry her.

9 2
Jiplo 18

i agree. and even more good news, she has to suffer for cheating! Go karma!

0 0
bobbycorwen 5

That's great news for in the long run! For now, no. I am sorry she's a cheating *****. :(

263 10
Furrywhiplash 14

Agreed. Plus it is better that OP found out now, rather than after they get married and he raises a kid that he only thinks is his

24 1
22jrdn55 15

This is a Maury's show or Jerry Springer kind of thing. OP- if you ever go on either shows, please say you're the guy from FML. FYL.

29 1
stevenJB 25

OMFG IT'S A CHOCOBO!!! :D

8 11
omfg_creepers 8

Give her some more bad news, she's a *****.

202 2
StoryOfTheYear 14

The Kardashians donated 20 bucks worth of games to a hospital. Brilliant! Where may I get more of this "mediocre news"?

5 7
StoryOfTheYear 14

Naww, that's bull-crap. He can't truly be homeless if he has a Ferrari to sleep in. *waits with troll net*

5 2
tripleshame 3

Hit him with a stick, he's not so tough. The mediocre news is in his cardboard treasure chest.

3 0
freakinglaugher 10

Don't hit a 'so to be' dad with a stick. That's right, Fiddo is the father. He's the only rich homeless man iv ever loved.

2 0
dontbeabeach 0

Talk about ****** there's a girl in are school that got pregnant

1 1
lolmigosh 15

So she's carrying an "unwanted miracle?"

44 11
bamagrl410 31

Isn't it sad how most people treat pregnancy like a terrible thing these days? Yay for traditional values.

19 8
StoryOfTheYear 14

^Uh hello? She has more than likely slept with another man and gotten pregnant while in a relationship already. I don't think anybody here means to say pregnancy in general is bad.

18 5
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

That's because most people can't afford to have children, and end up screwing themselves over and their newborn child. Sign of the times.

16 1
BeefyQueef 5

Like I always say, invest in tomorrow by aborting that baby today :)

7 38
BeaterOfTheDrums 15

Never joke about abortion. NEVER!

16 3
BeaterOfTheDrums 15

No.. Just no. Any jokes about abortion are not right.

12 2
SilentNicholas 0

He's not joking about abortion. He's saying she should get one if she can't afford to keep the baby

0 2
WCARlover 34

Bad news: she's a cheating *****, good news: you won't have to deal with her anymore:)

150 3
lakaiskate 12

Is it just me or are op's priorities backwards. Good news she's pregnant, bad news you may not be the father..

12 4
CheckItOutItsYou 7

No it's the girlfriend that doesn't have her priorities straight. OP is just repeating what she said

21 1
StoryOfTheYear 14

She doesn't have her priorities straight? What gives you that idea?

2 2
Dusty_Busters 15

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh! Nice

2 2
Right_Click 12

No sleepless nights and temper tantrums for you!! Muahaha. Wait, that's a good thing. Relax, OP. Let the strumpet deal with it.

31 4
ZDK5498 6

your girlfriend is a bitch and I would not care if she was good in bed or hot I would leave her ass!

0 4
drawmesunshine 17

Phew, that was a close one, OP. Sorry your girlfriend is a tramp, though.

23 2
GoW_Chick 14

Simple solution: Go on Maury and take a paternity test, you'll find out who the baby daddy is and you'll entertain trailer parks everywhere.

80 8
22jrdn55 15

"when it comes to one month old Jumbo, OP, you are NOT the father." *happy tears*

18 0
Poser1337 5

Be happy. At least she knows for sure you're not the father.

24 12
bobbycorwen 5

She doesn't. OP said probably.

9 3
Poser1337 5

Oh darn. I apologize. My mistake. :/ I'm guessing I'll be flooded with thumbs-downs now? Oh well, not like it matters.

19 6
bobbycorwen 5

I gave you a thumbs up for being a good sport.

14 4