Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
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By
melonrind
| 8
Nothing like a nice steamy room that has the scent of poo lingering in the air to spice things up ;) Lock the door next time!
By
Klefhomacked
| 11
Water waster.
COMMENTS
By
shutup_matt
| 5
First
Reply
gojira666
| 7
Shut up matt
Reply
Axipiter
| 24
Here comes the undertaker to bury this one.
By
melonrind
| 8
Nothing like a nice steamy room that has the scent of poo lingering in the air to spice things up ;) Lock the door next time!
Reply
Pleonasm
| 34
Ugh, the heat makes the smell worse! I can't imagine what it must've smelled like!
Reply
LO388
| 7
You guys must be pretty new to your relationship if you have to pretend you don't poop.
Reply
1awliet
| 8
Some doors don't have locks.
Reply
guy24
| 9
Some people do not make strong bad smells when they do that.
Reply
Bullpine
| 11
Not necessarily new. I was still embarressed I'd make a sound over a year into my relationship.
Reply
skyttlz
| 32
My bathroom door doesn't even close :( you have to hold it with your foot or put the garbage in front of it.
Reply
nictransitglory
| 4
My wife still has an elaborate plan for when she takes her shits so I don't notice them. It's been over 5 years and I have no plans to rock that boat anytime soon.
Reply
walmartpaysme
| 15
OP may have had the cold on and not the heat.
Reply
BeachBoi_Alex
| 7
Mmn, Beef Stroganoff...
Reply
PinkieKeen
| 20
132
I'm paranoid of closing doors because I'm afraid ghosts will come out of the walls or the lights will burn out. You want the doors closed.
Wanna switch?
I'm paranoid of closing doors because I'm afraid ghosts will come out of the walls or the lights will burn out. You want the doors closed.
Wanna switch?
By
olpally
| 32
No Giggity here D: hey, everybody poops! Yes, even girls! Lol. Just laugh it off.
Reply
melonrind
| 8
Everyone shits but I still don't like to get hit in the face with hot stank air when my man is releasing the kraken ...
Reply
olpally
| 32
Yeah, that's pretty nasty... D: *gags*
Reply
CallMeMcFeelii
| 13
12 - That was probably the best phrase I've ever heard for taking a dump. "Releasing the Kraken" haha I love it. Might steal that phrase haha.
Reply
Calingaladha
| 21
Or the less popular"Nobody Poops But You".
Reply
gc327072
| 29
My favorite saying is "dropping a deuce"
Reply
Dreamkiller51
| 5
80- just kill yourself!!
Reply
Calingaladha
| 21
My favorite is "dropping the Cosby kids off at the pool".
Reply
hershekissez
| 4
Funniest comment I've read up here!
Reply
j_cat187
| 19
I still have everybody poops on VHS
By
Desfar
| 5
Why didn't you lock the door...?
Reply
gc327072
| 29
Then it wouldn't have been an fml!
Reply
Drigr
| 9
20 - except when its the boyfriend looking for some sexy time.
Reply
kiwienne
| 21
Pretty sure people like that lock the door if they're able to. They turn the handle to double-check if it's locked. Never ever forgot/didn't care to lock the door myself, and I'm pretty anxious about using the toilet around other people as well :)
Reply
onlychildFTW
| 33
Bathrooms have locks for a reason.
Reply
Hershey903
| 5
My bathroom lock is broken. Thank God i live alone.
Reply
japtap81
| 16
I don't have a lock on my bathroom door. But then again my bf would walk in anyway cuz his sinuses are so bad he rarely smells anything. I'm just not allowed to walk in on him when he's pooping.
Reply
Googolman
| 29
OP said she didn't want her boyfriend to HEAR. It doesn't matter if the door was locked or not; she was just using the shower to drown out the noise.
Reply
KrazyKatz3
| 26
Some bathrooms don't have locks. You just assume no one will walk in if the door is closed.
By
Irishgypsy
| 2
Basil, damn it. That's not the spice I was looking for.
Reply
mariof13579
| 4
Your comment was not what people are for as well.
Reply
BeforeItWasCool
| 12
Neither was yours, so it would seem ^
Reply
eirianna
| 0
These are not the droids you're looking for
Reply
Marcella1016
| 30
I thumbed him down on general principle after reading his profile picture.
Douche.
Oh, and his comment sucked, yadda yadda
Douche.
Oh, and his comment sucked, yadda yadda
Reply
walmartpaysme
| 15
Really 138? I know people that do that to their kids. It's fucked up. They care more about getting their damn weed than they do about making sure their kids get real food.
By
bunny911
| 16
Pretty sure this is the other side of the story from an FML that was posted a little while ago.
By
KiddNYC1O
| 20
Hhhnnnnggghhh... release this demon!!!
By
walmartpaysme
| 15
Awkward, OP. Tell him to knock next time. Then again I guess that would take away from the "surprise".
Reply
noonenoeone
| 22
10, looks like Walmart paid you to eat the cakes too.
Reply
walmartpaysme
| 15
Wow, really? Does that make you feel better, asshole?
Reply
walmartpaysme
| 15
Thanks FML team. :)
By
k_cayte90
| 2
Well, there goes any mystery that was left...
Reply
F0xyTurtle
| 8
Cp
By
shutup_matt
| 5
I WAS FIRST ON HERE BUT FML MODDED MY COMMENT
Reply
melonrind
| 8
Bc you said first like a d-bag...
Reply
TBelle4Ever
| 15
Because you said "First!" EVERYONE hates when people say that, so quit complaining! Not you 11
Reply
TBelle4Ever
| 15
Sorry 11, the mods must have removed the guy I was trying to respond to right as I submitted, so it submitted to you by mistake... Once again, Sorry