Your everyday life stories

I replied with a simple "Oh really?"; pretty mid-ground comment if you ask me :) And she is a woman. In the office right now and she just smiled at me.

Anonymous - 03/11/2015 17:54 - United States

Today, I found out that aside from being savagely overworked and treated like shit for zero pay, another one of my responsibilities as an intern is to take the blame for my boss accidentally posting a link to a porn site on the company's Twitter account. FML

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Anonymous - 03/01/2011 10:29 - United States

Today, the alarm clock downstairs has been going off since 3am. The apartment belongs to two other students. They've gone home. Only 3 more days left to go. FML

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Harsh

blue - 25/08/2012 21:59 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my swimming coach made us swim fifty laps non-stop as punishment for his previous class being unable to swim a drill properly. They're 8-11 year olds who are still learning to swim. I feel like my arms and legs are filled with lead. FML

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Girl-of-very-little-brain - 29/12/2011 12:01 - Canada

Today, I woke up at midnight crying, stood up to turn on the lights and face-planted into my wall. FML

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Oh no, oh no no no

lauziej93 - - Spain - Logroño

Today, my mother-in-law became my boss. FML

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mandy_2480 - 19/02/2012 02:08 - China

Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML

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Anonymous - 17/08/2012 16:45 - United States - Brighton

Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML

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Tyler - 03/09/2012 09:37 - Australia - Killara

Today, I was walking down the street when I had a coughing fit. The next thing I know I'm being pushed about by a group of guys who were smoking, because they thought I was coughing deliberately to send them a message about smoking being bad. FML

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Anonymous - 30/05/2009 03:04 - United States

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

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Anonymous - 21/12/2011 02:01 - United States

Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML

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Never engage with crazy

fxck - 20/07/2012 22:45 - South Africa - Durban

Today, while walking home, I passed some guy loudly whining that foreign imports are destroying our economy, and that we should all be deported. When I pointed out that the mobile phone in his hand was clearly a Samsung, he turned bright red and punched me in the gut. FML

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Spinster - 30/09/2015 05:26 - United States - Brush

Today, I asked my boyfriend of 3 years what he thought about marriage in the future. "Who knows? We might meet other people soon." FML

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Anonymous - 09/05/2015 18:50 - United States - Humble

Today, on my first driving lesson, I crashed my instructor's car. I didn't even make it out of the parking lot. FML

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Byebye - 24/05/2012 19:30 - Netherlands - Sappemeer

Today, the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, because he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML

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lilykat84 - 29/07/2011 06:09 - United States

Today, I have a huge scab on my thigh. What from? My thighs rubbing together. FML

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lilykat84

lilykat84 4

Tuesday 18 September 2012 7:37

This is my FML.. that I wrote a while back ago! Just now commenting on it, ha. Anyways, yeah my thighs do rub together at times.. >.> It bites but sometimes powder helps a little. I learned the hard way that rubbing lotion (it was bath and body works lotion) on freshly chaffed thighs burns like hell. Truthfully I'm not THAT over weight. I would like to lose about 30 pounds though, but that'll have to wait until after February. Thanks for the comments though, some were pretty funny! ^.^